Road Rage - Why?

A recent news item in the Atlanta area told of a tragic death. A death that could have happened in any populated area, any city or country. Another death that happens in our society whether from illness, murder, drugs among all of the deaths that happen.

This type of death though tends to mystify me, road rage. A strange event that seems to develop from our inability to control our emotions or attitude while driving. Matthew Joint says, "in its broadest sense it can refer to any display of aggression by a driver. However, the term is often used to refer to the more extreme acts of aggression, such as a physical assault, that occur as a direct result of a disagreement between drivers."

A young father driving with his wife and young child is involved in a road rage incident with another man - he ends up dead of stab wounds. I'm not passing judgement on either person for that is the job of the court system. I do know from all accounts that 'road rage' involves two people. In most cases, each person has a part they played in a situation escalating.

Each of us have been involved most likely in some form of driving 'lapse of mental control'. It is some sense of 'territorial' behavior when we get within a car that causes us to loose a certain amount of reason. We are a better driver then everyone else, or we take offense at another's driving habits. Most incidents never grow beyond your own thoughts. Many times the other driver is unaware of your irritation.

Once the other driver is made aware though, by either a look or gesture from you. It may even be you becoming aggressive by deciding to 'retaliate' in some form with your own driving skill. It is this point which you have crossed and now the chances of this escalating into road rage have increased.

This increase can result in possible car damage, yelling at each other or possibly physical altercations. The ultimate ending being someone dead from the senseless actions. Stop and think for a minute, does it really make sense to let it get this far? If someone cut you off in traffic, tailgated too much...whatever the case may be, is it worth the potential pain. A young wife and daughter living in pain, another person now changing their own life forever.

To read more about this and what you can do to change your habits and avoid these types of incidents, see the following article Aggressive Driving: Three Studies. Stay alive, stay stress free and change your way of driving...there's a lot more to life.

Life Will Change

A recent quote from actor Tim Allen said, "change is all we really have so why do I let it get to me? Because something in me wants stability, but it is never stable, is it?" All of us look for consistency in our lives. We like the idea of things getting to a likable level and want it to just remain there.

Think of it as driving down the freeway in your car, a vacation trip long overdue. You have set the cruise control at 75 miles per hour, the sky is blue and spring has blossomed with flowers and the green of a new summer all around you. The love of your life is riding with you, maybe the kids or friends are there. Even your music is just right, things are all well. Your biggest wish is that the entire trip continues in this manner.

But then traffic begins to build, the cruise control no longer is an option. Road construction ahead and someone needs to use the rest room as well. What about something to eat, we're all getting hungry and tired. Things change, life changes things, it just happens...that is life.

How we deal with change is the determining factor in how we succeed or fail. By understanding that change will occur on a very unexpected schedule, you will be able to adapt and move on. Not all change is bad remember, but it shakes things up and makes you adjust your life. You can fight change, try to hold things the same. Doing so can be like building sand castles in the surf of a beach. A losing battle that frustrates and fails to accomplish your fight to keep life the same.

Some of the change is predictable or at least foreseeable. Good friends of ours have great change in front of them for their son. The son will have to live the major change and adapt to living in a completely different way. Their story could be any kind, you could plug most any story line into it and the simple fact of change remains. Their lives will have pain and sorrow but then attitude will take hold.

They will have to be strong and positive for the son, for themselves. It will be necessary to find the good things and the long term possibilities that this change brings upon them. Fighting against the tide will only weaken them and not give that support the son will greatly need. With family and friends in support, our friends will change themselves through this experience. They will let go of past hurts that prevented them from taking the positive approach to life and change.

Movement is occurring for them at this time, movement is occurring for you as well. Change will happen as sure as the sun will rise in the morning. Embrace change and find stability for yourself within it.

Influence Upon Change

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” Maya Angelou

There are days when you get bouts of reflection regarding people you know. Family, friends or co-workers. Each of us tend to develop thoughts and beliefs about those people, looking to see what they will become.

It may be a troubled teen that just seems to fight against understanding. Or the co-worker that just doesn't understand the meaning of succeeding in their job. Each of them on a path that you have no control over. As I have written before, you dictate your own attitude and path within life. There will be influences upon your life, but you have choice.

That influence I speak of is also something that each of us possess and on others. You can have positive influences and negatives influences upon others. Choose the positive ones and watch that person change over time. You'll be surprised by all of those changes that it takes to create this new person.

Yet when it happens and you see the grand butterfly of a person's life unfold, it will be due to all of those changes, all of those influences by many others including yourself.

What If It Were You

Today I am back from a great vacation that was good to have. It was full of everything you would expect and all of the other things that life throws at us as well. We made a trip to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to visit the historical battlefield from the U.S. Civil War. Other locations were visited as well, we passed the Blacksburg, Virginia site of the horrible shootings and other many things observed and enjoyed.

I also had the unfortunate opportunity to witness a head-on accident between a car and motorcycle. Myself and a few others got out, called emergency officials and assisted in any way that we could. I can not tell you if the motorcyclist survived his injuries. From what I observed, he would have been quite lucky if he did. My prayers and thoughts go out to him and his family as well as those also involved in the accident.

It surprised me observing all of this how many people simply left the scene. Many apparently not wanting to get involved, too busy to be concerned with the event that occurred. I direct this last statement to those that were direct witness to the accident. As busy as our lives are, we still need to have concern for our fellow human. It makes me wonder if these are the type of people one could depend upon for anything.

Life is taken away from us in many unexpected ways. It is something that a large majority of us have no control over. Yet for the living, how we respond to the death of another says much about our own character. A small level of compassion can go such a long way in the comforting of those that remain. As I have heard said, "prayers are for the deceased, sympathy is for the living."

Take a moment to think about how you might respond in an emergency. Even though it is tough to know exactly what that is, try to. Doing so now could make a difference in a real situation. As I would hope, if I were in need, out there are people willing to care and take action. Be a person of action to help others.