What Time Is It?

Busy couple of days here and travelling tonight so I may not get to write for another day or so. I recently accepted a new job position within my company. Its a different kind of job but similar in nature to what I do now. I have been somewhat hard pressed to explain why I am making this change.

There are plenty of reasons why and of course the new challenges that I'll be faced with are exciting. A musical group from the 70's called YES wrote a song called Time and Word that has a lyric in it that tends to explain it. The lyric goes, "There's a time and the time is now and it's right for me, It's right for me, and the time is now."

The time is right for me and I'm making movement in my life, I'm making a change. It is the same thing I've said many times to many of you. To change your life, you need to create movement. There will never be a better time then now to do so. For me, that time has come.

Every Woman

A small change of pace today and thought I would share with everyone. I got this of course from a woman - my wife. So for all the women out there, words of wisdom to help guide your life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
EVERY WOMAN

SHOULD HAVE...
A set of screwdrivers,
a cordless drill, and
a black lace bra..

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
One friend who
Always makes her Laugh..
And one
Who lets her cry...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
A good piece of furniture
not previously owned by
Anyone else in her family...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE
Eight matching plates,
Wine glasses with stems,
And a recipe for a meal that will
Make her guests feel honored.

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE...
A feeling of control over
Her destiny...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
How to fall in love
Without losing herself...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
How to quit a job...
Break up with a lover...
And confront a friend without ruining the friendship...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
When to try harder...
And when to walk away.

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
That she can't change
The length of her calves,
The width of her hips, or
The nature of her parents...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
That her childhood
May not have been
Perfect..but;
Its over...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she would and wouldn't
Do for love or more...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
How to live alone...
even if
She doesn't like it...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
Whom she can trust,
Whom she can't,
And why she shouldn't
Take it personally...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
Where to go...
Be it to her best friend's kitchen table..
Or a charming inn in the woods...
When her soul needs soothing...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she can and can't accomplish
In a day...
A month..
And a year...

Changing Winds Of Attitude

This past weekend I was relaxing outside the hotel I'm staying at. It was actually quite pleasant and a nice breeze was blowing through the palms. This was one of those moments I've talked about, getting your mind clear of the past weeks issues and concerns.

As I was watching the palm leaves move and sway to the whims of the breeze, it occurred to me that all of us can effect others in a similar manner. As we go about each day, we interact and impact other peoples lives. Causing their attitudes and beliefs to move and sway just like the palms leaves.

The winds of attitude flow in and out of you, causing changes in both yourself and in others. Whether you enter those lives like a raging hurricane or as a gentle breeze, the impact you have is genuine and real. When you enter your day, remember that your attitudes will flow through those around you.

John Steinbeck wrote, "Men do change, and change comes like a little wind that ruffles the curtains at dawn, and it comes like the stealthy perfume of wildflowers hidden in the grass." You can be the gentle wind or the essence of change upon someones life. Your life will be changed as well, so enjoy the breeze.

Extra Kindness - Being A Friend

A large part of my life involves the encouragement of others and trying to lift them up beyond where they are or want to be. I just tend to think each of us can make life a little more pleasant for those we come in contact with.

And perfect, I'm not even close to it and understand that life isn't necessarily a pursuit of perfection. It is more of a pursuit and improving oneself, giving of oneself leaving things in the wake of your path just a little better.

One of my co-workers is involved with a group that is being phased out. He will and has moved on to another project, but with his remaining responsibility, he is doing what he can to help these individuals move on. The people involved losing their jobs are talented and wonderful people. Business has simply changed the course of their lives. Yet here, a single person in the bigger picture is taking the time to care and help.

This is what I mean, taking the extra effort to help others beyond your own circumstance. He will leave a lasting impression on those people. Something inside him is made of goodness and it may seem simple of me to say, but that goodness is worth so much more in the big scheme of our lives.

I was given a gift recently with a quote inside the front cover. It came as a gracious gift from friends on my wife and I. The people giving it have gone through some of the toughest times anyone should have to endure. We supported them in ways that only friends can do. Each of us need the support and kindness. Their thankfulness said it all in this particular quote which read, "In troubled times, the caring of a friend falls softly like a gentle rain."

Try to be a friend to those you meet, go just a step further to show kindness and thoughtfulness to others. It will be returned to you in ways you will never imagine.

Birthday Greetings

Happy Birthday to everyone that is having a birthday today. Most importantly, my wife - she is celebrating one and as with anyone you love, call that person, make it a point to wish them a healthy and love filled day.

Many of us attempt to minimize our own birth date, but as Ellen Glasgow said, "It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me." Remember someone and send them a card, a phone call or even a visit to remind them of how special they are.

So Happy Birthday to my wife and to everyone else on this the 30th of May, 2007. May there be many more for you and may there be many more for us.

How To Achieve Success

"Don't wait until everything is just right. It will never be perfect. There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions. So what. Get started now. With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful" -Mark Victor Hansen

Each day many people struggle to be successful in life. It might be in getting that promotion or just that right partner. It might be writing a book or building a new career. Always getting deterred by one thing or another that is preventing you from achieving what you want.

Age will tell you that the 'time' will never be correct. It also tells you that you will never be fully prepared for the change. Many people never realize this and grow old never grasping that which they want or succeed in accomplishing it.

Adlin Sinclair, a businessman and motivational speaker said, "you are the embodiment of the information you choose to accept and act upon. To change your circumstances you need to change your thinking and subsequent actions." There's that word again, change. I've written of that many times, change your way of thinking.

And for goodness sake, just go for it...try something new, make movement in your life. Waiting for the perfect time will cause you to simply wait a long time. A long time that you could better use in accomplishing your goals. The type of attitude you present to your task will be an indicator of success or failure.

It will not be the result of poor timing because now is the time. Start moving with a positive attitude to your goal. "For success, attitude is equally as important as ability." is a quote I read somewhere but not sure whom to attribute it to. But the attitude that you bring to the table is just as important to the success you may have.

So start today, begin with one step, one email, one written page towards your goal and build upon it. The time will become right for your your success.

Sowing Positive Seeds

Each day we have the possibility of taking the gifts given to us and sowing them in others. As the painting above called "Sowing Seed" by Louis Hébert shows, our lives are much like the one that sows seeds. The sowing of seed is done to replenish the landscape and provide nourishment once again where there was none

You have that ability to sow into others lives, both good and bad. By the bad, I mean there are those that can have a tremendously negative effect on others. This past weekend, a young couple was driving by my home in a van. The young girl was driving and saw me as they slowly drove by. Whether they were married or not, from half a block away I could hear the young man yelling obscenities and hurtful things. The look upon her face was one of despair and pain.

Like the withered plant which is lacking in water and is being choked out by the weeds, my guess is the young man was like that weed destroying the roots of her existence.

Yet to sow a positive wave upon others is much like the careful tending of a garden. Watering when appropriate, clearing the field of weeds and allowing the plant to grow. When this is done, we reap the fruit of having given of ourselves to another. In love, knowledge or money, the sowing of each will be returned to you tenfold.

Be a sower of the positive, plant the seed of knowledge or love or even money into the lives of others. Your life will be enriched by the process and life will grow in abundance.

Change Your Life

“Whatever you hold in your mind will tend to occur in your life. If you continue to believe as you have always believed, you will continue to act as you have always acted. If you continue to act as you have always acted, you will continue to get what you have always gotten. If you want different results in your life or your work, all you have to do is change your mind.” -Unknown

When you live the same way and think the same way and believe the same way - your life will tend to remain the same. So if you are looking for change in your life, you will need to change the way you think. An example of how this can happen is given by Dawn Fields in an article titled Change the Way You Think and Change Your Life.

Ms. Fields provides the story of a man that wanted to become a writer and why he initially failed. She also provides four easy steps to follow. The steps are easy to remember, but it takes work to follow and stay with them. But if you do, chances are change will come your way and you will find yourself in a better place.

Over ten years ago, I made a change in the way I was thinking and doing things that set me on a course to where I am today. It effected family and friends but it also had an impact on new people we encountered along our path. Today I am looking to change once again, to change the way I think about my career. Those around me will be effected but like before, new people will be impacted by this change as well.

I look forward to this change and have learned to flow with change. Life will create change for you whether want it to or not. But you can also create change within your life by adopting a new way of thinking. Change the way you think about your life, adopt a new attitude and live a great life.

Mothers Day Revisited

I will start today asking each of you, "did you call your mother yesterday?" Or if she is no longer with us, did you stop and think of her? It is one of those things that as a child, you can never forget what she has done for or gone through for you.

Motherhood is one of those things in which one person (your mother) gives of herself to you. A serving attitude all in the course of raising her child. In return she will reap the benefit of undying love and adoration.

Mothers are as total as the sky;
Older than the earth, and more enduring.
They're rooted in our hearts like ancient trees,
Halfway down to seething lava seas;
Emblazoned on our sail, and on our mooring.
Returning home, we dwell within their sigh:
So maddening, so rich, so reassuring.

Happy Mother's Day to my Mom and all of the moms out there. And yes, I did call her yesterday!

To Serve Another

“The most infectiously joyous men and women are those who forget themselves in thinking about and serving others” -Robert J. McCracken

Within our life time, each of us will need to place our needs or wants to the side. It may be at a point when we have kids or some other obligation. This may be due to unforeseen circumstances or by choice, either way, you will be in a position requiring effort to help other first.

“Balance, peace, and joy are the fruit of a successful life. It starts with recognizing your talents and finding ways to serve others by using them.” -Thomas Kinkade

When this happens, you will have moved from a 'taking' environment into a 'serving' environment. This does not mean that you lose everything and nothing is gained. Far from that, you will reap benefits of having this serving attitude. It will impact you and those that you are serving.

“Happiness... consists in giving, and in serving others.” -Henry Drummond

Find a serving attitude in your heart and you will be rewarded with a fuller life. It is in the giving of yourself that your success will be measured.

Take Time For Yourself

So many times we are 'running so fast' trying to accomplish all of our daily routines. From getting ready for work, the kids off to school, important tasks at work to the evening activities, it can a very full day. Mixed in with all of this ordinary ritual of your day are the 'problems' and the 'planning' that you encounter or need to think about.

These 'things' you need to think about are those that will help your life move forward. All of the other things going on are part of that but are mostly the routines of the day. To move your life forward, you have a need to clearly think about any problems in your life. You need to clearly think about the future of your life. This can be difficult in between getting a child on the bus and getting to the train station in time.

So what should you do? Plan to take time out each day to reflect. Take just seven minutes to do this from your busy schedule. Why seven minutes? It is an odd number that is easy to remember, it is a 'lucky' number in some beliefs. Seven corresponds to the seven days of the week, the seven planets, seven rungs of perfection, seven spheres of celestial stairs, the seven petals of the rose, the seven branches of the shaman's cosmic tree and so on.

Seven denotes the fullness of the planetary orders, the fullness of the energies and principles in spiritual order. Seven was the Ancient Egyptian symbol of eternal life, and symbolizes the dynamic perfection of a completed cycle. Seven conveys the fresh start after a cycle has been completed and of positive regeneration.

Okay, so I made my point about the number seven. There are many different reasons why I chose seven minutes, but mainly just to give you a time frame for thought and reflection. That's the only reason. As a person in this life, we do not have all of the answers. We can not fix everything on our own. But daily we need to stop and think about where we can find help.

Each of us need a few moments to see where we can find guidance and reflection. Whether this be spiritually, intellectually or even physically, it is okay to look to others for help if that is needed. It also allows you time to think about what the need might be.

Take seven minutes each day, reflect upon your life and start to move your life forward. You will begin to see things more clearly and your life will change.

How To Avoid Road Rage

“Anger is a momentary madness, so control your passion or it will control you.” Horace (Ancient Roman Poet. 65 BC-8 BC)

My recent article on road rage spurred several responses about how one can control themselves. So over the weekend I read a few articles and thought I would share them with each of you. Anger that develops from within your vehicle is oddly enough something we would normally never allow to surface in other social situations.

And yes, driving is a social situation. It is a gathering of people in vehicles using the same roadways, attempting to reach a particular destination. There are laws and rules to driving which vary slightly from one place to another. There are also unwritten laws of courtesy and willingness to 'let it go'.

The AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety studied more than 10,000 incidents of violent aggressive driving committed between 1990 and 1996, it found that at least 218 people were killed and another 12,610 injured when drivers got angry. Many drivers involved in these incidents are men between the ages of 18 and 26, anyone can become aggressive if they let their anger take precedence over safe driving.

The AAA Foundation study found that men, women, and people of all ages can drive aggressively if they are in the wrong mood or circumstances. when drivers explained why they became violent the reasons are often incredibly trivial: “She would not let me pass,”“They kept tailgating me,” or, as this one driver accused of murder explained, “He practically ran me off the road — what was I supposed to do?”

(Source: ROAD RAGE - HOW TO AVOID AGGRESSIVE DRIVING)

So what can you do to avoid allowing yourself to start or become involved in an incident?

1. Don't offend: you know what they are, the same things that irritate you. Cutting people off, driving slow in the left lane, tailgating or making gestures. If it irritates you, chances are pretty good you doing the same things irritates others.

2. Don't engage: the old saying that it "takes two to tango." Another driver may start it, but if you respond or retaliate, then your as much at fault. Just refuse to be drawn into it, be the bigger person. The other person may be fuming, but you remaining calm and steer clear of the situation. As the article says, would you want your pilot on the plane flying and acting this way?

3. Adjust your attitude: make the drive more pleasant, it isn't a contest. The first one there is not what its about. And maybe there is some reason that person nearly drove you off the road...a bee entered the window and startled them?! Put yourself in their shoes and even if no, it isn't worth doing something you will likely regret later.

If you think you need help, find it before you go too far and commit a much greater offense. Avoid being an aggressive driver and learn how to avoid becoming a victim. There is a lot more to life then stressing behind the wheel of a car. Be safe.

Road Rage - Why?

A recent news item in the Atlanta area told of a tragic death. A death that could have happened in any populated area, any city or country. Another death that happens in our society whether from illness, murder, drugs among all of the deaths that happen.

This type of death though tends to mystify me, road rage. A strange event that seems to develop from our inability to control our emotions or attitude while driving. Matthew Joint says, "in its broadest sense it can refer to any display of aggression by a driver. However, the term is often used to refer to the more extreme acts of aggression, such as a physical assault, that occur as a direct result of a disagreement between drivers."

A young father driving with his wife and young child is involved in a road rage incident with another man - he ends up dead of stab wounds. I'm not passing judgement on either person for that is the job of the court system. I do know from all accounts that 'road rage' involves two people. In most cases, each person has a part they played in a situation escalating.

Each of us have been involved most likely in some form of driving 'lapse of mental control'. It is some sense of 'territorial' behavior when we get within a car that causes us to loose a certain amount of reason. We are a better driver then everyone else, or we take offense at another's driving habits. Most incidents never grow beyond your own thoughts. Many times the other driver is unaware of your irritation.

Once the other driver is made aware though, by either a look or gesture from you. It may even be you becoming aggressive by deciding to 'retaliate' in some form with your own driving skill. It is this point which you have crossed and now the chances of this escalating into road rage have increased.

This increase can result in possible car damage, yelling at each other or possibly physical altercations. The ultimate ending being someone dead from the senseless actions. Stop and think for a minute, does it really make sense to let it get this far? If someone cut you off in traffic, tailgated too much...whatever the case may be, is it worth the potential pain. A young wife and daughter living in pain, another person now changing their own life forever.

To read more about this and what you can do to change your habits and avoid these types of incidents, see the following article Aggressive Driving: Three Studies. Stay alive, stay stress free and change your way of driving...there's a lot more to life.

Life Will Change

A recent quote from actor Tim Allen said, "change is all we really have so why do I let it get to me? Because something in me wants stability, but it is never stable, is it?" All of us look for consistency in our lives. We like the idea of things getting to a likable level and want it to just remain there.

Think of it as driving down the freeway in your car, a vacation trip long overdue. You have set the cruise control at 75 miles per hour, the sky is blue and spring has blossomed with flowers and the green of a new summer all around you. The love of your life is riding with you, maybe the kids or friends are there. Even your music is just right, things are all well. Your biggest wish is that the entire trip continues in this manner.

But then traffic begins to build, the cruise control no longer is an option. Road construction ahead and someone needs to use the rest room as well. What about something to eat, we're all getting hungry and tired. Things change, life changes things, it just happens...that is life.

How we deal with change is the determining factor in how we succeed or fail. By understanding that change will occur on a very unexpected schedule, you will be able to adapt and move on. Not all change is bad remember, but it shakes things up and makes you adjust your life. You can fight change, try to hold things the same. Doing so can be like building sand castles in the surf of a beach. A losing battle that frustrates and fails to accomplish your fight to keep life the same.

Some of the change is predictable or at least foreseeable. Good friends of ours have great change in front of them for their son. The son will have to live the major change and adapt to living in a completely different way. Their story could be any kind, you could plug most any story line into it and the simple fact of change remains. Their lives will have pain and sorrow but then attitude will take hold.

They will have to be strong and positive for the son, for themselves. It will be necessary to find the good things and the long term possibilities that this change brings upon them. Fighting against the tide will only weaken them and not give that support the son will greatly need. With family and friends in support, our friends will change themselves through this experience. They will let go of past hurts that prevented them from taking the positive approach to life and change.

Movement is occurring for them at this time, movement is occurring for you as well. Change will happen as sure as the sun will rise in the morning. Embrace change and find stability for yourself within it.

Influence Upon Change

“We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty.” Maya Angelou

There are days when you get bouts of reflection regarding people you know. Family, friends or co-workers. Each of us tend to develop thoughts and beliefs about those people, looking to see what they will become.

It may be a troubled teen that just seems to fight against understanding. Or the co-worker that just doesn't understand the meaning of succeeding in their job. Each of them on a path that you have no control over. As I have written before, you dictate your own attitude and path within life. There will be influences upon your life, but you have choice.

That influence I speak of is also something that each of us possess and on others. You can have positive influences and negatives influences upon others. Choose the positive ones and watch that person change over time. You'll be surprised by all of those changes that it takes to create this new person.

Yet when it happens and you see the grand butterfly of a person's life unfold, it will be due to all of those changes, all of those influences by many others including yourself.

What If It Were You

Today I am back from a great vacation that was good to have. It was full of everything you would expect and all of the other things that life throws at us as well. We made a trip to Gettysburg, Pennsylvania to visit the historical battlefield from the U.S. Civil War. Other locations were visited as well, we passed the Blacksburg, Virginia site of the horrible shootings and other many things observed and enjoyed.

I also had the unfortunate opportunity to witness a head-on accident between a car and motorcycle. Myself and a few others got out, called emergency officials and assisted in any way that we could. I can not tell you if the motorcyclist survived his injuries. From what I observed, he would have been quite lucky if he did. My prayers and thoughts go out to him and his family as well as those also involved in the accident.

It surprised me observing all of this how many people simply left the scene. Many apparently not wanting to get involved, too busy to be concerned with the event that occurred. I direct this last statement to those that were direct witness to the accident. As busy as our lives are, we still need to have concern for our fellow human. It makes me wonder if these are the type of people one could depend upon for anything.

Life is taken away from us in many unexpected ways. It is something that a large majority of us have no control over. Yet for the living, how we respond to the death of another says much about our own character. A small level of compassion can go such a long way in the comforting of those that remain. As I have heard said, "prayers are for the deceased, sympathy is for the living."

Take a moment to think about how you might respond in an emergency. Even though it is tough to know exactly what that is, try to. Doing so now could make a difference in a real situation. As I would hope, if I were in need, out there are people willing to care and take action. Be a person of action to help others.

Virginia Tech in Memorium

Trying to make sense of the senseless is a very difficult thing to do. The recent events at Virginia Tech underscore how cruel life can be. The unexpected nature of life throwing pain and sorrow at each of us in varying degrees will make us question the senseless.

The responsibility of this tragedy lay with the person whom committed it. People that were directly effected and died much too soon. Your faith and beliefs will provide you with the ability to find some comfort. You will learn about yourself, devastated families will learn about themselves and others remotely effected will learn as well.

How one moves on from an incident such as this will be worked out individually among all of the survivors. Just know that life will continue and you must move on beyond it. This does not mean to lose the great memories of those victims of a senseless act. There will be heart ache and grief for many that will eventually subside. I only hope that each of the families directly effected, the suvivors that are healing right now and those traumatized can find some amount of strength in the days to come.

In memoriam for those that lost their life, I list the victims. My prayers and words of strength to their families.

Ross Abdallah Alameddine, 20
Christopher James Bishop, 35
Brian Bluhm, 25
Ryan Clark, 22
Austin Cloyd, 18
Jocelyne Couture-Nowak
Daniel Perez Cueva, 21
Kevin Granata, 45
Matthew Gwaltney, 24
Caitlin Hammaren, 19
Jeremy Herbstritt, 27
Rachael Hill, 18
Emily Jane Hilscher, 19
Jarrett Lane, 22
Matthew La Porte, 20
Henry Lee, 20
Liviu Librescu, 76
G.V. Loganathan, 51
Partahi Lombantoruan, 34
Lauren McCain, 20
Daniel O'Neil, 22
Juan Ortiz, 26
Minal Panchal, 26
Erin Peterson, 18
Michael Pohle, 23
Julia Pryde, 23
Mary Read, 19
Reema Samaha, 18
Waleed Mohammed Shaalan, 32
Leslie Sherman, 20
Maxine Turner, 22
Nicole White, 20

All of these people were beautiful and wonderful. With the loss of each one, the stars will shine a little brighter and the sun a little brighter as each one of them will be shining down upon each of us.

Today & Tomorrow

I will be vacationing for a few days and will write again upon my return. Until then, I leave a quote for you to think about today and dream about tomorrow.

“Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...” Ralph Waldo Emerson

Spring Is Near

We are approaching the end of a winter season in the northern hemisphere. The spring of a new season is coming quickly. Maybe not quickly enough for some and the 'weather man' may contradict it. Yet spring is coming as sure as time continues on.

Doug Larson, an English middle-distance runner who won gold medals at the 1924 Olympic Games in Paris said, “Spring is when you feel like whistling even with a shoe full of slush.” It is this optimism that brings you through the rough times. It strengthens you to take full advantage of the better times that await.

When we wallow in despair and anger, we weaken our mind and body. If this carries over into those times when life isn't quite so bad, then we are not in a position to take advantage of opportunity. Keep your head up, work through the coldness of winter and prepare for the spring of a new life.

Change will occur with the coming season. As you see buds of new opportunity, ready your mind and attitude to change with it. There will be great things happening for you when you create movement this coming spring time.

Hope For Tomorrow

The Entombment of Christ by Carravagio.

For Christians around the world, today is Good Friday. The day that remembers the crucifixion and death of Jesus at Calvary. This is a holy day observed by most Christian religions.
Mainstream Christian churches view Christ's crucifixion as a voluntary and vicarious act, and one by which, along with resurrection on the third day, death itself was conquered.

Others religions have their holy days as well, each of us with some central faith in purpose and meaning of our lives. Even non-religious people have their beliefs in some type of reasoning. We must have and hold onto the realities of life but we also have to create faith within ourselves. One that will allow us to look into the unknown, the future or to even set a goal for our life.

I normally do not bring my religious beliefs into full view within my writings. My wish is to have something to say to everyone of every dimension. To offer words of encouragement and hope to anyone that happens upon my site. Today though, I proudly display my religion and faith. For me, this weekend is about hope and faith in a greater tomorrow.

"It was very early on the first day of the week and still dark, when Mary of Magdala came to the tomb. She saw that the stone had been moved away... and came running to Simon Peter and the other disciple... Peter set out with the other disciple to go to the tomb. They ran together. Simon went right into the tomb. Then the other disciple also went in; he saw and he believed. Till this moment they had failed to understand the teaching of scripture that he must rise from the dead." (John 20)

Brand You

Recently I read an article regarding job loss and how you can 'bounce back'. I have had friends lose their jobs and seen the various results of it. Myself, I have been blessed to work at the same company for over 20 years. This is no small feat given the job arena these days.

In fact, today's generation can expect to change career jobs 3 or more times in their working life. Much of this is due to new opportunity or the inevitable 'downsizing' that many companies regularly go through. Call a layoff whatever you want, it is still a layoff and people lose jobs and lives are thrown into turmoil.

So what can you do if it happens? The first thing you can do is to 'anticipate your dismissal' by staying tuned to what is going on around you. This does not mean being paranoid about your job performance and rumors. It does mean watching the direction of the company, understanding what is happening at a much higher level. Is the company doing well in sales, in the market place. Is your job vital to the longterm growth of the company. Can you position yourself to be an asset as opposed to an expendable if a layoff occurs? Are you working on improving the market brand called 'you' - more later.

But the inevitable happens and you find yourself on the outside looking in. Just know that you are not alone. Many people go through this so don't be embarrassed to talk about it. Go ahead and 'embrace the situation' because the loss of the job is out of your control now. Its okay to get angry as it is a part of your own healing process. Just get over it and move on, you have a life ahead of you to live.

So now what do you start doing? Well, start by 'choosing your referrals carefully' before jumping into the resume and job application process. If your former employer (direct supervisor) and you are on good terms, ask them what they would say if a potential employer called. If its bad, then you should find someone else to act as a referral.

Remember, you are currently in a sales job and the only brand you have to sell is 'you'. Tom Peters calls it Brand You and its your life and career we are talking about. A good way to think about it is to look at some of the top performers that are known by a single name. Madonna, Sting, Bono, Cher and the list goes on. The name is said and you know what and who that person is. You need to define yourself and sell yourself as you would the world's greatest product.

Now the resume, 'list all jobs on your resume' - even the ones you may have been fired from. But just list the start /end dates and not why you left the job. Use your interview to explain why you left a particular job.

And finally, 'spend your time between jobs wisely' and not in self pity or wild abandon. If you were laid off due to lack of skills, then take the time to learn some new skills. It will certainly help during a new job interview to state, "I have taken the following classes during this time to help improve my skill sets." And know what your skill sets are, you're going to be asked. Knowing your own pros and cons goes back to BRAND YOU and what you can offer to a potential new company.

Expanding Your World

The following pictures are from a recent trip to Brussels. I feel privileged to have the opportunity to travel in my job function. I have seen so much of the world yet so little of it.

In every location that I go, there is a bit of it that I try to experience and bring back with me to share. It is my hope that my children will be able to personally see the places I have been. To experience the wonder of what this world has to offer.

If you can not travel, you can travel on the internet to far off places and see what different cultures and environments are like. You can expand your world by looking. Our time and technology have given us the ability to see things that older generations could only see in more limited formats.

The ability to move about and around the world are easier. There is a great landscape of discovery for each of us to grab hold of. It is said that the only great undiscovered area are the oceans. But not for you or me...we have a whole world that we have not seen.

Find new ways to search out this world, the landscape, the architecture and the people. You'll find so much to see, so much to enjoy when you expand your world of vision.

Voices Of The Fallen

You consider your life and the troubles you may have. You wonder why things are always happening to you, why your life is so tough. There are so many things that can trouble us in our daily life.

But each of us see the news each day concerning the war in Iraq. It can seem like a distant event occurring so far away from our daily lives. But each of those American service men and women are just like you and me. They are fighting many different radical groups among Iraqi people that simply want to have a life at all.

Due to this distance, we don't see the connections beyond the politics of war and the thirty second sound bites or even commentary from the experts. Yet a recent issue of Newsweek Magazine called Voices Of The Fallen gives you another view on what is happening half a world away. The emails and letters from soldiers that eventually died reveal pieces of the war that a news story simply can not.

You find all levels of opinion and commentary just as you would walking down the street talking to people. I am proud of what these individuals, the soldiers along aside their Iraqi Military counterparts - trying to provide a more stable and brighter future for the Iraqi people. And when I think about how tough my day was, I can stop and remember what a tougher day these others have had.

Stop yourself and consider what you have in life. Think about others that do have it so much worse. Think about where you are on that scale to place it into perspective. Be thankful for what you do have and then work towards a better future, a better life.

Influence Upon Others

"Your life can and is an influence upon those who need it most." - Joseph Primm

Yes, that is me quoting myself above. I've quoted many a person in my writings and have always felt a privilege to learn from those small bits of wisdom. There have been many times that I have written saying you need to step out in faith.

There will be those times when you simply can not see tomorrow clearly. You have prepared and done things to set yourself up for success. But tomorrow has what I've read is a certain amount of randomness to it. You can only try to prepare yourself to be in as good of a position (economically, socially, physically) to overcome - or take advantage - of what tomorrow brings.

The rest becomes faith in what will happen. Your faith is derived from what ever your philosophical or theological teachings have given you. You believe in yourself and move forward with your own wisdom. I believe my life as is your life can and is an influence upon others. We step out each day knowing that we can contribute to others.

It does not mean that we should force upon others that which we believe. We simply provide influence and example to others. The act of doing will help others to better their own lives should they choose to make a change. Remember that even the most successful among us are not the happiest, nor the poorest the saddest.

Only you can decide what the definition of a 'better life' is for you. And to understand where you are in life, you study the example of others. You learn what ways of living can improve those areas of life that you want to change. So for others, providing example and influence upon others will help get people where they want to be.

The influence you have upon others works in reverse as well. Others have influence upon you as well. The good, the bad - each can push us towards either direction. Exact the good parts of your life around others, learn from the good of others all in a manner that will better your life.

So I've gotten a bit deep and probably not extremely clear in the idea. Simply put, that which you do has influence upon others. Be a good influence to others. Those that need it the most will be enriched the most.

Live A Long Life

A fellow employee where I work sent me the following. I share it as good advice and hope when it comes to his type or any type of sickness. Think long term folks, we are not invincible...so take care of yourselves and live a long life.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please allow me to take a few moments of your time.

As another year has gone by, I feel it is time to once again speak up in regards to my bout with cancer some 28 years ago.

The story starts at a bowling alley of all places. I had a passion for this activity in my earlier years, bowling in multiple leagues several nights per week (not much else to do on the frozen tundra of Iowa in the winter months). On this particular evening as I released the ball I felt a pain in my groin but only passed it off as "a pinch".

I noticed some swelling over the next couple of days and as a result I made an appointment with my local physician. Little did I know at the time it was the single most important thing I could have done at that point in my first 33 years. The doctor immediately referred me to a urologist specialist, Marvin Jungling. During the first appointment the doctor looked me directly in the eye, after a short exam, and said "95% chance it is malignant and you have a 90% chance to survive because you came to see me".

I shall never forget those few words and the profound affect they had on me and my family. I was sent home to "prepare" over the weekend. On March 25, 1979 I went to surgery. The result was the removal of my right testicle; it was malignant as tested at the University Of Iowa Hospitals. I spent the next couple of days looking at the family as they came and went through blurry eyes brimming with tears at the thoughts of the possible outcome. I thought about my 4 children ages 11,8,4 & 3 and thinking what if I don’t get to see them grow up???

On the third day I said to the doctor that I would beat this thing or die trying. Marve looked at me and said; "you just beat it" the first step is the will power to fight. Over the next 8 days I started my recuperation only to find concern that the cancer could have spread to the lymph system. This put us back in surgery with what is referred to as a lumpectomy.

The doctor removed 31 lymph nodes in an 8 and one half hour surgery. The results were 3 nodes with some microscopic spots, not good news, but not as bad as your mind always thinks of. As a result after 17 days in the hospital, I went into a chemotherapy program as a precautionary procedure. I had five days of chemo the first week of the month; the plan was for this to last approximately a year.

At this point I have to say this was the low point of the whole experience. I was never so sick, or felt so helpless against a liquid that could just knock me down and render me almost helpless to the constant nausea that came along with the 15 minute IV drip.

A couple of months later a third exploratory surgery was performed on the right side. My first good news came in the form of a "no problems found". This truly signaled the turning of the corner in my quest to regain my health. First it was the "cat scan" at the 3 months, then 6 months followed by each year for the next five years. At the end of the 5 years a doctor down in Virginia looked at me and said I did not need to bother coming back for the tests anymore.

WHAT a relief, I did go back at the ten year point just for a sanity check.

Well it is now 28 years later, and I share this with all of you because; I made a promise to myself that if I could be spared I would continue to tell my story and provide any assistance I can to anyone who is going through this situation. Please, if you do not have yearly check ups and physicals make the appointment and do so starting today.

The single most important message is SELF DIAGNOSIS. If you are not familiar with how or where you should check, ask a doctor. The internet has some very good articles on how to perform these examinations, but I would ask that this be done in preparation for your visit to a physician.

I offer any assistance I can provide. If you are going through it, or know someone who maybe just needs an understanding person to talk to, do not hesitate to get them in touch with me. I will always make myself available. I want my experience and outcome to offer hope to those that may be facing some hard decisions.

Please feel free to distribute to any person or organization that can benefit from this message.
Thank you for your time

Bill Callen
EMC Corporation
Senior Manager / Symmetrix Technical Support, Level 2, US

Roll On Easier

I have spoken previously of a method that you can use to measure your life. It is called the Wheel Of Life and I was introduced to it by a friend of mine, Dean Sweetman. You can search the web and will likely find many sources that came from Buddhist traditions.

There are other forms both complicated and intriguing that you may find as well. The one taught to me is simple in form and in understanding. A wheel with six spokes that when perfectly round will allow your life to move easily. As an out of round wheel is hard to turn and slows you down, that particular part of your life needs to be worked on.

In previous articles I wrote of these spokes and I'm pleased that Dean is working this into a whole series. It is my hope that he creates a book so that he can offer it to others. But don't think it is a 'pump you up' motivational event full of heart pounding excitement. No, the idea is just a simple way for you to look at your life, to keep it in balance and to help you provide measurement of how well your life is going.

The great thing about it comes from self evaluation, measuring yourself in such a manner that honesty inside you must come forth. When you visually see the six spokes and connect the dots, the shape that takes form may be a football. Footballs when they bounce are unpredictable and never roll straight. A three-legged starfish shape may appear and three points do not roll all that well. Or even a flat-tire shape. You begin rolling but then hit the flat spot on the tire, you struggle again to get moving.

As you view the shape of your life, visually you can see what it is that slows you down each time. And when you do find a deficiency in your life, fix it now. If not, as you attempt to roll through life that area of the wheel will return.

As I'm writing this, don't envision me in a monks robe with candles spread about and chanting. It is a functional method that helps me honestly look at my life. It helps me to smooth out the rough edges and to expand my life.

Expand and improve your life, roll on easier.

Goals: Tips On Achieving

Joy Browne writes a great article in Parade Magazine called How To Set Goals - And Reach Them. She offers a few ideas that you can use to reach a vision or dream. I have written previously and expressed to many others that you need to establish goals and when doing so, write them down.

There is nothing more powerful then looking at a piece of paper with a goal written upon it. That piece of paper can be a powerful voice to you every time you read it. I have heard others speak of placing these written items on the bedroom wall, the bathroom mirror, steering wheel of the car, as well as your computer terminal at work.

The tips Ms. Browne writes about are;

- Avoid New Year's-type resolutions
- Be Specific
- Think in steps
- Figure out your tactics
- Limit the number of goals
- Build on your skills
- Embrace change

Ms. Browne is a clinical psychologist and is well respected in her field. I suggest you read the article to learn more. I will talk more about goals and living your life with change. You can achieve things in life, you can achieve a great life. But it will take change, it will take movement by you. Grab the chance to move now.

Travel Safely

For those that do not travel a lot may not have some of the 'built-in sensors' as someone that travels quite a lot. Myself, most of the traveling has always employed various ways of making sure I'm safe. There is always the possibility of something happening, whether it be in your own country or when traveling abroad.

A recent article in Executive Travel Magazine, psychologist Terry Riley provides twelve travel tips. The tips talk about 'traveling overseas', yet I've always felt regardless of where you travel, it is always a good idea to be careful in unfamiliar locations.

So here are Mr. Riley's twelve tips. For more, find and read his books 'Travel Can Be Murder', 'C.H.A.R.M. School' and 'The Complete Travel Diet'.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
12. Don’t go.
Granted, this is really a ‘don’t travel’ tip, but it bears mentioning. If you genuinely feel that you could be in danger by traveling to your destination, don’t go. Applying some creativity may lead you to find another way to accomplish your business goal without having to make an in-person visit. It’s not worth risking your life to advance your career.

11. Know where to go and how to get there.
Before you leave home, contact a friend, colleague or government official who is familiar with your destination and can give you the skinny on how to get around. Study a map of the area to plot out your routes ahead of time, and take the map with you. (Important corollary to this tip: Know what places to avoid and how to circumvent them.)

10. Pack a “survival” kit.
My kit includes a small flashlight (in case of power failure), duct tape (to prevent smoke from entering a hotel room where I might have to await rescue from a fire) and, of course, a cell phone (that will work at my destination).

9. Get your rest, and avoid alcohol and other drugs.
Travelers who are confused, tired, drunk or doped up are easy prey. Combine any of these vulnerabilities and your chances of being victimized increase substantially.

8. Keep a low profile.
Affluent Americans and employees of American corporations are prime targets when traveling internationally. Don’t advertise your wealth, citizenship or company affiliation. Leave expensive jewelry at home, cover your identification and remove your company’s logos from your clothing and luggage.

7. Travel light, and keep moving.
Criminals prefer stationary and slow-moving targets—the expression is “sitting ducks”—so you want to be able to move smartly along your way. Carry only what you need in transit. If you have excess luggage or cumbersome items to transport, ship them in advance.

6. Make eye contact.
Develop a habit of looking around and making eye contact with others—especially those behind you. A strong deterrent to crime is the possibility of being caught. A criminal is way more likely to be caught if he knows he can be identified.

5. Stay with others.
Criminals prefer lone targets. There is safety in numbers, even if those numbers include strangers.

4. Protect your identity.
When you make reservations, use only your first initial and last name. Even if you’re a cautious traveler, few things will disarm you more than a stranger calling your name. While you are trying to figure out how you know the guy who called out to you, he may be figuring out how to snatch your goodies. And, if you are a woman, using only your first initial means advance notice of your gender is denied to anyone who may be lying in wait.

3. Trust your instincts.
Listen to your internal danger alert system, and act on its warnings. In most cases, it won’t let you down.

2. Never trust others to manage your safety.
You are ultimately responsible for your personal safety while traveling.

1. Never trust others to manage your safety.
This tip is so important it bears repeating: Only you are responsible for your safety -- no one else.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“When you travel, remember that a foreign country is not designed to make you comfortable. It is designed to make its own people comfortable.” Clifton Fadiman

What Secret

Recent articles have started to surface regarding the 'power of positive thinking' life style and beliefs of people. Most of these have come about due to a book and subsequent new movie called "The Secret". It is a movie that some have described as "a movie so powerful that it can change the course of your life." There are those with an opinion of differing belief about living a more positive life.

The book itself teaches that the "principle explains that we create our own circumstances by the choices we make in life. And the choices we make are fueled by our thoughts—which means our thoughts are the most powerful things we have here on earth." The argument against the book is that it is simply a form of 'new-age' hucksterism.

I have a tend to agree with some of the arguments regarding the material. There seems to be a bit of 'over-commercialism' and 'marketing hype' going on. Heck, I myself tend to become a bit 'flowery' in my own writings but I try not to let it overshadow the basic message. I also don't agree completely with all of the teachings but I would allow you the time to read and judge for yourself. I believe there is a place to find common ground in its message.

This means striking a balance between both ends of the opinion scale. To take advice on the merits of common sense and reality. There are many things that I say in my own writings that are wrapped into the ideas contained in Rhonda Byrne's book (The Secret). She has a much bigger stage to speak from at this point but my own stage is available to those seeking something more as well. It is up to you, the reader, to choose the source which best speaks to you.

When you are searching for a change in life, being positive about your life is not a bad thing. It comes in all different shapes and forms. The basic principle for me is if you are a more positive and happier person regardless of present circumstance; others will be more apt to come into your world. A simple human truth is that we much prefer to be around happy people as opposed to cranky ones.

And in the bigger world, cranky people come in many different levels of success. The same way happy people do...successful or not we can learn from those we chose to be around. Opportunity will seem to gravitate towards happier people. The only reason I can surmise is that a happy person is more apt to see the opportunity as possibility. While the cranky person will find reason not to involve themselves.

As for 'The Secret' itself, is it really a secret? Not really but it is a pretty good title to capture the attention of millions of people. It is a good book that I do think you can learn lessons from for a better life. It can help you bring balance to the six spokes of your life. Learn from many different sources, for it is in the search of betterment of your life that reveal to you that which truly makes you happy.

Power Of Belief

"Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us." - Wilma Rudolph

There is an underlying thought among many people that our dreams have no relevance to daily life. Without the power of dreams, withouth the influence of our own spirit we will never move forward or gain more in life.

Our ability to motivate ourselves and others is a tremendous thing that you must take hold of. Be willing to believe in your dream, to hold onto it and reach for that which awaits you. Others will catch the spirit of your belief and begin to believe in themselves.

Faith Begins With One Step

Martin Luther King, Jr. once said, "Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step." This faith is one that you have to define. Mine is in a God and the fullness of what I believe he has to offer. Your faith may be defined in other ways, but to succeed in life, you do need to have something that will sustain and motivate you.

A friend of mine just recently found a new job after being out of work for many months. There were many things that life threw at his family over the course of this time. Health, money and home all were attacked by the troubles that plagued him. Many job interviews and coming so close yet being informed by the potential employer they had chosen a different direction.

Yet my friend maintained faith, perseverance, honor and his sense of humor. I'm sure during the quiet hours of night that depression would attempt to take hold. Yet he has weathered the deep canyon of life. When its walls seemed much too high to scale, he kept on and kept that faith. Today life is beginning to become more clear and the climb out of this deep area is becoming easier.

I'm sure he still feels that he has a long way to go. But from my viewpoint, he has come a very long distance already. I have great respect and admiration for this man as an example of carrying his faith the entire distance. To paraphrase from the quote above, "...the end doesn't have to be in site, just the beginning of the path." Begin your journey and if needed, pave your own path.

Don't Be Afraid

This was passed along to me and I thought to share with each of you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.

You'll cry because time is passing too fast and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

Don't be afraid that your life will end. Be afraid that it will never begin.

Attitude For Life

This has been around for a long time but I like repeating it from time to time. It is an essay of sort regarding how one can approach life. Most certainly there are circumstances within our life over which we have no control.

We do have power over our own attitude and how those circumstances effect us. It is with that power that one can overcome obstacles or at the very least 'ride through' those tough times.

So read on and see if you can capture the spirit of its meaning. Adapt it within your own life. It will not keep the good or bad from happening. What it will do is allow you to adjust your own path through what life throws at you.

Attitude

The longer I live
The more I realize the impact of attitude on life.
Attitude, to me, is more important than the past,
Than education,
Than money,
Than circumstances,
Than failures,
Than success,
Than what other people think or say or do.

It is more important than appearance,
Giftedness or skill.
It will make or break an organization,
A school, a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day
Regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.
We cannot change our past.
We cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.
We cannot change the inevitable.

The only thing we can do
Is play the string we have.
And that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10 percent what happens to me
And 90 percent how I react to it.
And so it is with you.

- Charles Swindoll

Series Of Misfortunes

“My life has been full of terrible misfortunes most of which never happened.”
Michel de Montaigne (French Philosopher and Writer. 1533-1592)

I recently took my sixteen year old son to the funeral of another sixteen year old friend. A very nice young boy that was in an unfortunate accident. Two of three boys were killed in that accident and those lives remaining were changed forever. The driver of the other vehicle is the son of friends that are close to my brother-in-law.

There was no fault of this other driver and the young man driving the vehicle in which the three boys were in simply over-corrected when his car went off the side of the road. Unfortunate circumstances that brought time to a stop much too early for these two young boys.

Montaigne wrote that his life was full of terrible misfortune. Misfortune as having been party to an accident, having a friend die tragically or other life changing events. But your life is not a series of misfortunes. Do not let the hard things in life convince you that all of life is bad. Take this as a life changing event. Carry on the memory of who that person was, what the event meant and create something bigger and better from it. That something is your life, to carry on in a greater manner.

Bad things will happen in life and it is we who choose the path to follow afterwards. Create a path of greatness from the lessons of misfortune. Remember with fondness the memory of those gone before you and hold onto the dream of a bright tomorrow.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My heartfelt prayers and condolences to both families. Your pain and sorrow will ease in time. Take hold of the loving memory that each of your sons gave to you. Let it be a gift from each of them to last your life.

JOHN MICHAEL SEFCIK
John Michael Sefcik, age 16 of Buford, GA, died Tuesday, February 20, 2007 from injuries sustained in an automobile accident. Mr. Sefcik is survived by his father and step mother, John and Liuba Sefcik, Buford, GA; Mother, Carmen A. Sefcik, Germany; Brother, Timo Sefcik, Germany; Brother and Fiancé’, Rouven Sefcik and Alicia Newman, Dover Air Force Base, Delaware; Step Brother, Sasha Alov, Buford, GA. Many Aunts, Uncles and Cousins. Michael was born in Pruem, Germany while his father was serving in the U.S. Military and lived in the metro Atlanta area the past 6 years. He was a student at Mill Creek High School.
Hamilton Mill Memorial Chapel (www.hamiltonmillchapel.com)

PAUL COLEMAN
Paul Coleman age 16 of Buford died Tuesday, February 20, 2007. Paul is survived by his parents Jon, Jr. and Ronna Coleman, of Buford; Paternal Grandparents- Jon, Sr. and Pat Coleman, of Hampton, GA; Maternal Grandparents- Don and Donna Townsend, Of Texas. Paul was of the Baptist Faith and attended Mill Creek High School.
Tapp/Tim Stewart Funeral Home (www.stewartfh.com)

Why Don't He Write No More

It has been a few too many days since I've written. Even though I do not consider myself a writer, I can feel sort of what it is like to have 'writers block.' With my work and all that goes on in life, my mind has drifted to other parts of that life. Yet I do find myself wondering how many of the great writers may have dealt with this.

Even many of the inspirational speakers that weekly get up and speak to thousands of people must go through periods and seasons. Just how many ways can you describe the benefits of living life in a positive way? Examples abound out there and I read as much as time will allow.

The stories, the anecdotes or even the occassional comic are all intended to give you different perspectives of attitude. I have been struggling to find a way to place these stories to book. Is there a formula that works for many of you. Should it be 365 days of attitude, a book, a daily calendar or attitude fortune cookies?

Maybe those of you out there could help me. I'm looking for a publisher or how to contact the appropriate ones with the idea. I'm looking for affirmation that there would be interest out there. And maybe I should take my own advice and simply step out there and simply do it.

Send me your comments and I'll get my 'inspiration' back soon enough. Writing today is the first step in starting it all back up again.

Doors Of Change

Picture source, Life In Italy

Flora Whittemore - “The doors we open and close each day decide the lives we live.”

There are many doors you choose to walk through each day. Varying shapes and styles, of colors and age. Some are grand elegant doors and others are broken.

You get to pick most of these doors through which you travel each day. Sometimes, the choices are limited and at other times, only one is there to go through.

So you choose, go through or turn back. Like the building by the crossroads I have spoken before, it may start with only one door, but going through it will open your eyes to so many more choices.

(Read Tuesday, March 21, 2006 - Life At A Crossroads)

It takes a bold first step to open and walk through that one door. Then it becomes a series of opening and closing doors. Trying never to look back but to move forward with each bold decision that you make. Reach out and turn the door knob to change in your life.

A Dog's Day

Today was a great day and is one of those days that you just feel good about your life. Our family has been 'dog-less' for a couple of years and it was simply time to lighten our home up again.

This particular girl was adopted through the local humane society near where we live. These animals are foster cared for until a suitable family can be found. It isn't a simple "come in and pay your money" exercise either. A reasonable amount of interviewing is performed. These people that perform this service are folks that deeply care for the well-being of these abandoned pets.

As pets go, they can be very good companions and there is evidence to suggest better health when a loving pet is around the home. If you have the right temperment and get a general good feeling when your pet is near, then stress can be relieved. This alone will help with your heart and other stress-related issues.

So is a pet right for everyone? Probably not, but for us it was time. For many others it may not be the right time. If you are not able to adopt a pet, then consider supporting your local chapter. Its a good way to help out a great cause...its a good way to feel good about yourself.

Little Truisms

Here is a little something that is making the rounds on the internet. It has some nice little truisms to live by. Enjoy and have a great weekend everyone.

ONE.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO.
Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE.
Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR.
When you say, "I love you", mean it.

FIVE.
When you say, "I'm sorry", look the person in the eye.

SIX.
Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN.
Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT.
Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE.
Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN.
In disagreements, fight fairly. Please No name calling.

ELEVEN.
Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE.
Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN.
When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN.
Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN.
Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN.
When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN.
Remember the three R's:
Respect for self;
Respect for others;
Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN.
Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN..
When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY.
Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY ONE.
Spend some time alone.

Burning Yourself

A recent article in Readers Digest - "Burned Out", a story unfolds regarding how we tend to be the 'do all' people. Between family activities, trying to get ahead at work, being the charity worker and getting to the gym to stay healthy - there just doesn't seem to be enough time during the day.

Yet it isn't time that is a factor. The same amount of seconds, minutes and hours still exist within a 24 hour period as did when time was first measured. As individuals, we are the ones that fill up the seconds of our day. And as you may have noted, I said the 'seconds' of our day. For those that are nearing burnout have pushed themselves to the point of having to count the seconds.

With the stress comes increasing mental and physical fatigue. Your job suffers, your friends suffer, your family suffers and you suffer. There are many symptoms and signs that any short search of the internet or talking to your family doctor can help reveal.

While the Readers Digest article concentrates on 'burn out' at work, stress and 'burn out' can happen to anyone that stretches themselves too thin, trying to be the 'all and everything.' To overcome burnout, the article suggests the following eight recommendations. For more detail on each, I'd suggest reading the article.

- Make time for yourself
- Develop a method to calm yourself
- Analyze what you love and hate about your work (or whatever it is your are doing)
- Settle for less than perfect
- Take good care of yourself
- Cultivate a support network (those fish net connections I've talked about)
- Set limits (saying 'no' is a valid answer)
- Plan for the future

American author Natalie Goldberg is quoted as saying, “Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath. Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. Nothing is that important. Just lie down.” Maybe take seven minutes out of your day...and yes, that is only 420 seconds...to relax and think about it.

Mending Fishing Nets

"Repairing Fishing Nets"
- photography by Don Kon

Your life is like a series of connections, like the knots of a fishing net. Each knot is a relationship with another person. As these knots or connections grow, the larger the net becomes. Your impact on other peoples lives grows as well.

But you can't simply create a connection and forget about it. Each knot of the net has to be tended to. When a weak spot develops, a hole can develop. Not only your relationship but a piece of your life slips through.

When this happens, what is left will be difficult to gather back in. So mending and caring for each connection is important.

These relationships are more important than having all of the money in the world. These relationships define who you are. An old saying goes something like this, "he who dies with the most toys wins." But the reality of it is that "he who dies with the most toys still dies."

Tend to your life net connections, those relationships that will improve your life and others. The net will be there when you fall and help you when you recover. It will impact and connect many people to many others. It is your impact on other lives that will mean the most when life ends...a lasting memory to guide others when you are long gone.

Seventh Day

A day of relaxation, a day of reflection and a day to rejuvenate for a new week. You take time out through out your week to catch your breath. It is a necessary part of everything we do in life. The frustrations can build due to work, family issues or the everyday things that life throws at you.

With good attitude and a cheerful spirit, most days pass with an ability to see it through. You may even find yourself using my belief in a 'seven minutes a day' to stop and reflect. But on the seventh day, which may be a Saturday or Sunday, it may be any day that fits into your life schedule. The seventh day should be used to stop and regroup your self.

I would not be so bold to say that life goes after others, it comes after me and those around me as well. Each of us has to take time to re-gather our thoughts. To build ourselves back up for another round of taking on life. It gets easier as you go on in life. You find moments during the day that you can use, those seven minutes, that will work well for you.

The English author Ashleigh Brilliant once said, “Try to relax and enjoy the crisis.” Life is a series of mini-crisis as some may say. I say if you take time out each day and also provide a day for yourself, life will be much grander. Take time for yourself and you will be better prepared to impact others.

After The Job

Last night, I attended a gathering of people to help celebrate the retirement of a long-time co-worker. This man worked for nearly 25 years at the same company as me, having put in seventeen previous to this one at a different company.

He is a man that I had interactions with at various points in my own career with each of us at different positions along the way. He was always there with a smile, a bit of cheer in his voice and from what I could tell, goodness in his heart.

As it is with retirement and people moving on from the life of a career job, each of us will move on to new things in our life. The people you once worked with will slip into the past with our memories. We will remember each other and from time to time reconnect. Yet having known each other enrichens our lives. It helps shape who we've become and what we will continue to be.

As you go about your work day, know that one day you will retire or move on to other things. Create goodness in all that you do. It will impact those you work with for a life time. Thank you Ray for the daily smile and good word. Enjoy your life and the memories will live on.

“Life's truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way.”

Keeping A Dream

“Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained.” - Marie Curie

A couple of good friends of mine here in the Atlanta area are guys that inspire me with their level of perseverance. Guys that I look up to as examples of not letting life beat you down. To continue on despite the difficulty.

Both were hit by the down swing in the job market a couple of years ago. The experts say the job market has rebounded but its certainly a different market. Many that were let go were older employees with higher paying salaries. When the various industries started hiring again, they were looking for young people and much lower salary costs.

In trying to get rehired, each of these individuals has continued to look, to try and reinsert themselves into their fields of experience. Both were very good and the circumstances each faced were beyond their control. So they keep doing what it takes to survive, not only for themselves but mainly for their families.

It can be painful to watch their struggle to regain what was lost. Yet I would never suggest that pain is even close to what they are going through. And every time I see these individuals, they are positive and continuing living each day. My wish is for each of them to find their way back into what it is they each do so well.

For each of us, they are great examples of perseverance in the wake of adverse conditions. Life has an odd and non-discriminatory way of placing burden upon people. Keep after your dream each day.

Have Faith

"When you get to the end of all the light you know, and it's time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: either you will be given something solid to stand on, or you will be taught how to fly." - Edward Teller



You must have faith in yourself and in your beliefs that all will work out. If not, you will never begin your first step down any path. Start your journey now and learn to believe and trust. Step out into the unknown and achieve.

-the artist is Kevin A. Williams

Healthier Lives

“Our bodies are getting healthier and we're living much longer and the biggest threat now to being able to function well and productively when we're older is in the functioning of the brain.”
- Ian Robertson

Living a longer and healthier life is something we as men fail to acknowledge early enough in life. But with more information, we can each take care of ourselves much better. A recent article in Best Health Magazine regarding maintaining a healthier heart, also provides a list of the best medical tests for men.

I've provided a list and the article indicates that catching a problem in its early stages is now possible with new technology. But most of these tests won't get prescribed by a doctor unless you ask for them. So here they are, treat your body and then treat your brain. How to treat your brain...look up what each of the tests are and read about them.

30s

Fasting Blood Glucose - once a year
HIV ELISA / Western Blot - once every five years
High Sensitivity CRP and Homocysteine Tests - every five years
Testicular Exam - monthly
Body Mass Index - every three years, or whenever you gain weight
Full Lipid Profile - at least once every five years
Blood Pressure - once a year
Dental Exam - twice a year

40s

Carotid Duplex Ultrasound - once at age 40, then as necessary depending on results
PSA - once a year
Dermatological Exam - annual self-exam; professional exam every five years
64-Slice CT Scan - once at age 40, then every five years or as necessary depending upon results
Glaucoma Test (Tonometry) - one every two years

50s

Colonoscopy - once every 5-10 years or as necessary depending upon results
Hearing - every three years

Unknown Kindness

There are days when you wonder what all of the fuss is about. Having a positive attitude, being a generally nice person and just doing good in your life. You smiled and thanked the person behind the counter at the gas station. They frowned and probably gave you that "you're weird" look. Maybe everyone you come in contact with just isn't on that same good feeling level that you are.

It hardly seems worth staying on the positive stream of life. If nobody else is getting on board, why should you keep on trying. It must mean that life isn't all that great and you might as well join the frown crowd. But persevere in your way of life, happiness can be and is a way of life that everyone can enjoy.

What you do today, the way you treat others will impact those yet unknown. That attendant may simply take the smile and pass it on. It will silently slip from them with the next person they assist. They won't even realize where it came from. The person receiving it will smile back, touched by the small act of kindness. So was it worth it? You smiling regardless of what you received in return made a change in someones life. Someone you didn't know, someone that will never know it came from you.

"We cannot live only for ourselves. A thousand fibers connect us with our fellow men; and among those fibers, as sympathetic threads, our actions run as causes, and they come back to us as effects." - Herman Melville

Greater Intentions

One of the people I have been reading lately is Dr. Wayne Dyer and pulling words of attitude and inspiration from what he says. To introduce you to him, I've linked to a video called Power of Intention. It is a rather long video (1hour 14min) but is a great way to start you on your own journey finding a greater attitude, a greater purpose and a greater life.

Believe In

One of the pleasures of my job is getting to meet people from all around the world. The varied places that I travel allow me to connect with different cultures and different attitudes. So when I am going about my day, I try to impact as many people as possible in positive ways.

Passing along a smile or kind word is a simple thing to do. Or many times, the universally appreciated 'kind' ear to listen to them. Maybe is only brightens their moment or 'nudges' them in the direction of a greater life. Some times it impacts their life in life changing ways.

Most of the time we will never know. But the 'not knowing' is where the 'believing' comes in. Believing that you do help and impact peoples lives. That you do help create change in their world.

It is then up to that individual to accept your positive message or gesture, to make movement and begin to believe as well.

Inspiration Offers

Inspiration comes in many forms and it comes at different times. I am no different than many of you in this respect. Dr. Wayne Dyer calls it being "in-spirit." There are many that would scoff in the belief in the 'spirit of ones self.' For me it is a driving force in who and what I am. Spirit of ones life comes in many different forms and variations.

In what ever form it comes, the spirit of ones life should be a driving factor in all you do. On average, we are only here in the physical for a mere 75 to 80 years. That is not a whole lot of time in the greater perspective and I have belief in something beyond our physical understandings of life. That certainly there is more to our existence then a biological one.

If I am wrong in believing that, then I have lost nothing. I lived a happy and content life or to say it another way, "he who dies with the most toys still dies." All of what I am saying here is not to debate religious beliefs of life and death. Nor is it to argue the philosophical beliefs you may have regarding the same.

What the intent is to offer my thoughts on what works for me. What gives me inspiration to live a happy and content life. To make this life a little better for those that I come in contact with. To impact them so that life can be greater for all around. Sounds simplistic and utopian, which is not the intent because I do understand the realities of life.

Just be inspired to do something good, to experience inspiration in all of its different wonders. Your life will be better, those around you will be better and success and achievement can follow. Remain 'in-spirit' as often as you can, learn from what it offers your life.

Staying Connected

One good suggestion for a prosperous life is to stay connected with good people, successful people...positive people. When you seperate yourself, when you allow yourself to be cut off from good influences, you become easy prey for negative experiences and negative people.

Those that would like to bring you down will have an easier time of it. This is because there are no positive influences that can protect you with advice and support. Your life becomes susceptible to those that would weaken you further.

Do your life a favor and run towards connection with positive and caring people. Surround yourself with those that can lift you. Do not be deceived by the negative for it clouds itself in very deceptive ways. The best way to combat the negative is to gather with those that have goodness in their life. Learn from the multitude of positives that do exist in your life.

As my friend Dean Sweetman has said, "this life isn't a trial run, this is it." Be bold and strong with the good that life has to offer.