Rolling It Up The Hill

This week we are sharing some older posts that received attention by many of my readers. Here is one from July 28, 2010 titled "Journey Onward".

"The will to persevere is often the difference between failure and success." ~David Sarnoff

In Greek mythology Sisyphus was a king whom was punished by being made to roll a huge rock up a hill, only to watch it roll back down. He repeats this throughout eternity.

The shear will to keep performing this task has many different meanings but maybe it is in the struggle itself towards greatness that is enough to fill your heart. In other words, maybe it is the journey that should be enjoyed.

We persevere throughout our life to reach a goal, dream or final destination in life. What we fail to do many times is to enjoy that wide spectrum of activity between starting and achieving. It can be in the doing of life that provides us with the most enlightenment and enjoyment.

The achievement itself is wonderful but many times it simply becomes another step to something even greater. The journey continues beyond the achievement and it is perseverance that will keep us moving forward.

Enjoy your journey and persevere throughout the process which will be difficult at times. Achievement will only be temporary, the real reward is in the journey itself.

Your Patience Appreciated

So enjoy some older posts, like this one from November 16, 2010 titled "Waiting for a Tow Truck".

"We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery." ~Charlie Chaplin

The other day I was sitting in a restaurant eating dinner with my wife. We were dining on the patio area with big thick glass walls dividing us from the plaza which stretched some distance to the street. The time was rush hour near a particularly busy area of Los Angeles, which sounds odd because I feel every area in Los Angeles is quite busy with traffic.

As the cars filled the lanes to go straight or to turn left, each was trying to simply get home from a long day at work no doubt. Then as circumstance always seems to happen, a car broke down in the turn lane. A ruin to the driver's day and quickly becoming the same to drivers behind him.

With so much traffic on the street, cars quickly piled up behind him wanting to turn left. He was several car lengths from the light, so as those in front would clear, those behind him would vent frustration by honking their horn. Some would find a clear opportunity and move out into oncoming lanes to get around, others would try to squeeze back to the right to get around. But no matter what happened, no one was getting out to help this man.

You could hear the shouts of some, the horns of others and the driving habits of those getting around that the source of their problems for the day were this one man.  Yet twice we saw people stop to offer help. One young lady going so far as to put herself in a bit of a dangerous position with the amount and speed of oncoming traffic.

Yet from what we could tell at a distance is that the man waved off help as he had apparently called for a tow truck. Waiting and waiting was going to be his penance for having car trouble, at rush hour and inconviencing so many other people.  The horns, the gestures and the wait were his to endure.

The tow truck did arrive within the hour and pulled him to safety, freeing up traffic to go about its busy day. And what became of the man we will never know. But it likely ended as you might expect; a tow bill, a car repair bill, late getting home, tired and exhausted.

What of those other people that mocked and ridiculed him with the gestures and honks of displeasure? Did their day really improve by taking it out on this one lone driver? Was this broken down vehicle a planned event to be the reason for a bad day? Did these people acutally end up feeling better? It is unlikely that they did for the broken down vehicle was only a distraction.

What of the few people that did offer to stop and help? I'm betting that their day actually improved. I'm betting that it eased some of the burden in their day. Even those that didn't stop but were mindful and empathetic to the situation; they likely had an easing of their day.

The idea of helping others, in any shape or form is ingrained in our human nature. Some of us repress it as a horrible thing to have. Yet others embrace it and understand the power of helping others. Another person's misfortune is not our gain, but an opportunity to lift yourself while lifting another person. It makes you a better person, it reflects a better side of who you are and other people notice.

Would I be inclined to one day meet one of the irate people that flashed a demeaning gesture? Or would I rather meet the person that stopped to offer help to another person in need?

Think about how you would react in your busy day. Not only stuck in traffic, but in the grocery line, at the bank or even with your children brushing their teeth before bed. Patience, understanding and kindness will take us much further towards a successful life then the alternative.

Be the Difference

"Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does." -William James

My message to you today is what William James says so succinctly. You do make a difference. You can get up, go out into the world and change people's lives for the better. There is no one stopping you from doing this. It starts with you making the decision that all possibility exists. You then start movement in your world to do it.

Very few people have that one huge idea that comes to life and immediately impacts huge numbers of people. What happens is that it starts small, like a seed beginning to germinate. A rose bush can be grown from seed, but it takes time. It takes roughly two years for a rose seed to germinate into a seedling that can be replanted for growth. It takes time to nurture and grow what will be a great thing.

For you, it means starting with the simple gestures of kindness to those you come in contact with. It means being a better person to your family, your friends and to those you do not even know. This develops your character such that it becomes a natural thing that you do. It becomes a part of your everyday behavior.

Your idea starts small, you begin serving meals at the homeless shelter and over time it grows into a community outreach that impacts thousands of lives. Your small thought starts by teaching computer skills to single Moms or single Dads. Teaching them skills that will better their lives and give them the ability to succeed. This idea grows into an organization backed by large corporations wanting to help you change lives.

It starts by writing a blog that inspires people to do great things in life. As you notice, it all begins with one and multiplies to many. Your impact may seem small, but it becomes huge over time.

Be a person of impact, whether it be on one person or a million. You can make all the difference.

Walk a Mile

Walk A Mile Photograph -Nada Frazier

“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.” -Jack Handey

There I was, driving to the funeral home, thinking about the passing of a friend. Road construction was blocking my right lane, so dutifully set my left turn signal on and began to move into the left lane. Yes, I thought I looked well enough but apparently it startled the gentleman and his wife.

I stopped as did the traffic due to the red light in front of us. Me partially in his lane and he pulled up along my side wildly yelling something at me. So I rolled down my window, as did he, to offer him an apology. Thus began a 60-second lecture on my driving habits, nearly killing his wife, and never taking the time to hear my apology.

His window went back up, the light turned green and traffic began to move again. As Murphy's Law dictates, I followed him for the next mile or so. It did not give me much of a chance to calm my nerves. But after he pulled into a shopping center, I began to think of my friend recently deceased and let the incident roll off my back like water from a duck.

Later that evening during a memorial service I reflected upon the incident among other things. I learned that one thing my departed friend would say is, "don't react, just respond." It seemed appropriate because unknowingly that is what I had tried to do; respond to the situation while the 'offended driver' reacted to the situation.

It reminds me that if we simply stop to consider the journey someone else might be on before 'reacting' maybe we will respond differently to the situation. In my life I have failed to do just that and later realized there was something else, another story to be told.

This particular incident does not excuse me from my poor driving decision. We each get distracted by life, our job, our relationships, our finances, our health and our smart phones. There are reasons for our behaviors and until we consider there might be other reasons, we are reacting in the dark. When we acknowledge the possibility of someone else, we can respond in the light.

It doesn't take literally 'walking a mile in someones shoes' to fully understand the impact of simply responding as opposed to reacting. But you will begin to live a more relaxed and happier life when you take others into consideration.

As for the upset driver, apologies for my abrupt driving as I was distracted. I also apologize because you may have been stressed over going to the mall. A presumption on my part but hey, its possible.