"I'm okay in my skin, you know... I'm okay with who I am." ~Dana Plato
So many years ago, I had quite a bit of shyness in my personality. I'm not quite sure where it came from as I remember in my mind not being that way in the early days of elementary school. Then for some unknown (and not really important) reason I remember third grade being the point of rising shyness.
I think much of it came from becoming self-consciousness. I know I had become aware around that time of many physical differences being pointed out by other kids. And no, I'm not blaming anything in my life on my childhood or others. It is a realization that came to me sometime back that actually helped me put it all to rest.
The bright red hair I had became a source of discomfort and torment. Although the 'old women' always thought it was cute. My thin and gangly body that really was not athletic despite my best efforts added to the discomfort of growing up.
One could probably say that I developed very thin skin over those years. It also was the excuse I used for not enjoying so many of those years in my youth. Wasted time, wasted opportunity as I look back on it. I only have myself to point at for those years gone by. But when the day came that I let it go, that I became "comfortable in my own skin" was the day that life changed.
We each can become comfortable by better understanding ourself. The more you understand why you react, why you feel, why you are who you are, then the comfort begins to take over. I guess a lot of that really causes one to become more self-confident which then brings on the comfort.
In Psychology Today there is an article by Barton Goldsmith that provides ten steps to help you build that confidence. And as I say, you can read these articles over and over, but until you start moving or actually doing these things, nothing will change.
Today I still have tendencies to be shy and lacking confidence, but I have also learned to recognize these things. And in knowing that, I can quickly work to overcome them so that I never miss another day to enjoy. Become comfortable with who you are and enjoy each of your days as well.
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