Monday, June 22, 2015
Don't Feed The Anger
"Flying off the handle sometimes causes hammers and humans to lose their heads, as well as their effectiveness." - William Arthur Ward
There have been many stories in recent weeks in which people have lost their cool and struck out in anger. Some of these stories have been related to rightful or wrongful involvement of law enforcement. Other stories have been of hateful, terroristic people doing unspeakable harm to others.
Yet there are even more daily stories, some reported by the new but many that go unseen except for those near and close. These are stories of simple everyday anger boiling to the surface. These stories are of anger, hate and rage and come in many different forms.
Anger can turn into rage which can lead to pain for all involved.
A question you might ask yourself is what possesses people when they get behind the wheel of a car? A story in the Glendale, California News-Press told the story in which a man was stabbed after an incident of road rage. Most certainly these incidents are typically fueled by both parties. But why do we carry a large "chip on our shoulder" when driving our car?
There are many reasons, but I believe it comes from anger.
Not necessarily anger coming from the other person's actions, but anger generated from what is going on in one's own life. In the example of road rage, the anger could be stirred up by the stress of traffic after a long day at work. We are tired, we may not have gotten the raise we had hoped for or needed.
It could be one of a hundred other reasons which have placed that seed of anger inside of us. We then get behind the wheel of our car and the anger spills over to be taken out on another person. That other driver is just some non-descript person who happens to be in the sights of your anger.
An unsuspecting stranger who is probably having a bad day as well.
Anger is "...an assertion of the individual's most basic right to being an individual," as described by Dr. Stephen Diamond. When all else seems to be out of your control, job, bills, relationships, traffic; we can let forth anger to stake our ground.
We reach a point of lashing out and try to take back what we feel is lost.
And anger is never about the other person, place, or thing. Anger is our reaction to those things. Those things do not dictate our anger. We dictate our own anger and emotion; we control our own attitude.
You get to choose how you will react.
Many times it take simple self-control; stopping and counting those ten seconds, or taking a deep breath to fight back the anger. But if you find that you simply can not control your anger, then you need to find professional help.
Anger unchecked can have devastating consequences for both you, your loved ones and others who cross paths with. Just think of the lives impacted by the road rage incident in Glendale, California. Lives directly and indirectly altered by unchecked anger. Think of the bigger issues causing anger which are in the news.
Anger only begets anger.
Don't feed your anger.
Starve it in any manner that you can. For if you do not, the anger will feed on you and consume your life.
Stay inspired my friends.