Overcoming Anything

"Fear is your greatest obstacle - so question your fear. If it does not serve your greatest life then do not make it your master." ~Joy Page

As you go through life, there are going to be obstacles attempting to weigh you down. There will be things that try to slow you down. There will be people that try to stand in the way of your dreams. Take the life of a man named Barry Pincus. Born in Brooklyn in the early 40s, his parents divorced when he was just two years old.

As he grew up he learned to play piano and learned what he could of music. His mother then remarried when he was nearly 13. She married a man named Willie who drove a beer truck for the Schaefer Brewery. It was through his mother's new husband that a whole new world opened up. Willie had a record collection of Jazz and Broadway musicals that vastly changed the way Barry Pincus viewed his world.

As he grew up, Barry Pincus worked his way through Julliard's School of Music and worked in the mail room at CBS Television. Like many others, he started at the bottom in the mailroom and worked his way up. Life probably couldn't get any better for Barry Pincus some thought. But he kept his dreams intact and there was nothing that was going to keep him down. Even after marriage and an emotional divorce that would set many back, Barry Pincus ventured on.

He started work at composing music and performing at small gigs. He even wrote jingles for commericals to support himself and to feed his vision. Eventually he connected with a person by the name of Bette Midler and the two performed with Barry being the musical director. The two became a very successful pair and Barry Pincus gained popularity as well.

Barry Manilow is how Barry Pincus is better known. He is famous for his multitude of songs and very successful performing career. He did much of this in the face of harsh music critics. Many called his music 'sentimental garbage', a tough remark for anyone to face. But Barry Manilow persevered in his dreams and remains very popular today.

Barry Pincus could have 'folded his cards' many times when others set out to criticize and place those obstacles in his path. Your life faces many of the same challenges. Never give up. Always believe in your dreams, believe in your visions.

Overcome the obstacles in your life and find your greatest life.

Memories

"Things that were hard to bear are sweet to remember." ~Seneca

There are three dates that cling in my memory like many others.

20 Oct 1989

14 Oct 2008

04 Jan 2011

These dates mark the passing of a sister, a mother and most recently a brother. Each of them were mournful and hard just like the ones you have or may have to go through. But each of them also were and remain a celebration of the lives that they lived.

I remember the days of large family picnics where our large family got together with cousins and aunts and uncles. It seemed in those days everyone had large families. So the gatherings were large and wild and tiring and ... yes, I have some fond memories of those events.

I remember our own family gathered whether it be at a picnic table or at the dinner table. All of us together, even with the childhood bickering that could happen, I still relish those memories. The gathering of our family was always an event in my mind. It solidified who we were as a family. It made us a family.

After a day of flowers and cards, sweet chocolates and kisses, I'm reminded of the love and great time with those that have gone before me. It brings a smile to my face to remember each of them. It brings a smile to my face believing that the three are together with others at a large picnic. It brings a smile to my face knowing they are peacefully in my mind.

You have the ability to create memories that are lasting and loving. We create them each and every day. It does not happen just on Valentines Day. It happens each morning when you kiss your loved ones before heading out to work. It happens when you hug your kids when you see them. It happens when you sit down to a meal.

Memories are stored inside each of us, meant to be brought out as a reminder of the love we have and have been given. Yes, the bad memories do exist but are overpowered by the loving ones. Create memories for your life and in the lives of others.

Dean Martin sang a song called "Memories Are Made Of This" that is a nice reminder. Enjoy and then make some memories to be cherished and remembered for a very long time.

Love Is

One of the greatest love poems in the history of human existence. It actually comes from the Bible (1 Corinthians 13) and is often referred to as the love poem.

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Have a happy and loving Valentines day everyone. And a very special Happy Birthday to my daughter Shirin. Happy Birthday Momma Fletcher.

Face to Face

"Pity may represent little more than the impersonal concern which prompts the mailing of a check, but true sympathy is the personal concern which demands the giving of one's soul.." ~Martin Luther King, Jr

Main Entry: impersonal
Part of Speech: adjective
Definition: cold, unfriendly
Synonyms: abstract, bureaucratic, businesslike, candid, cold turkey, cold-blooded, colorless, cool, detached, disinterested, dispassionate, emotionless, equal, equitable, fair, formal, impartial, indifferent, inhuman, neutral, nondiscriminatory, objective, poker-faced, remote, straight, strictly business, unbiased, uncolored, unpassioned

Every day it seems that our lives become much more impersonal with the use of email and social networks. The idea of a face-to-face conversation even is terrifying to some people. We walk around all day looking at our Blackberry or sit at dinner playing with our iPhone. I am certainly one that has to work at setting those devices down and simply talking.

An example of the impersonal nature of life comes in the form of our housing mortgage problems. Yes, you can say that many lenders and borrowers were like 'drunken sailors on shore leave' (apologies to the Navy for using this euphemism).

Everyone was lending money, everyone was borrowing money and much of it outside of their means. And when things turned sour in the economy, the worst of these were first to go. But then the people that had qualified, were making payments, were doing everything right lost a piece of the American dream.

Their hours were reduced, many lost jobs due to the economic downturn and many started to do what they could to uphold their end of the deal. The banks, the mortgage lenders, the money side of this equation started feeling the pinch as well. They were looking for any means to shore up their losses and clean up their books. So many started calling in these loans.

Now I'm over simplifying but on the surface, the cards started to fall all around many people. The worst part of it was the impersonal nature in how it was done. The form letters informing people that they were 'seriously' in arrears. The increasingly tough letters to back people up against the wall. Take it or leave it deals.

All the while, a friendly ending to each saying thank you for your attention to this matter. They even provided phone numbers that when you called would proclaim, "we value your business." All very impersonal, all very stale and no one that you could speak with face-to-face.

Now my wife and I have never fallen into this situation. But the stories we have heard, the stories we have read tell a tale of people just trying to do what is right. But those same people were getting a cold, stale look in return.

Yes, again there are those that over borrowed, those that tried to take advantage of the system. But many were just trying to achieve their dreams. And it is the impersonal nature in which lenders and mortgage holders reacted that contributed as well.

To sit down in front of someone, face-to-face and have a discussion about a situation goes much further. Tension can be the beginning, but once two people look each other in the eye, the healing begins. When you put down the phone, when you stop typing those emails, and talk; things begin to get accomplished.

All of the gadgets we have in life are fantastic and do a lot of great things for our lives. But the most important thing in life is two or more people gathered. Talking to each other, sharing a meal, sharing their lives with each other.

Think about it and then have a face-to-face conversation with someone.