Stand and Speak

Have you ever considered what your body language might be saying when you are speaking to others?

When you are speaking to others, the content of what you are saying may seem very good and potentially very informative. But the way you move and gesture accounts for so much more. It is said that our words account for only 7 percent of your effectiveness when speak according to Albert Mehrabian. In his 1971 book, Silent Messages, Mehrabian set three elements of communication or importance to giving a presentation. These are also considered in the "7%-38%-55% Rule".

1. Verbal ability (7%) - this is your content or knowledge of the subject at hand. The percentage is what the listener's perception is of you.

2. Vocal ability (35%) - how well you speak, including tone, pitch and inflection. Again, the percentage is what the listener's perception is of you.

3. Visual presence (55%) - how you physically look while presenting is a large percentage of the listener's perception of you.

What this basically means is that listeners make a quick judgment about your credibility and level of expertise based upon how you look and sound. Certainly goes against the old adage of not to 'judge a book by its cover'. But human nature is what it is. So working on both your visual and vocal ability will get you much further.

Some of the basic guidelines I've found are as follows. These guidelines assume you will be standing, but you can modify them if in a sitting position. For more detail on these items, see Sheri Jeavons article in Executive Travel magazine, July, 2007.

- Look at one person when you make an important statement. Then slowly move your eyes to each of the people you are speaking to. Slow, decisive eye contact communicates confidence. It also help you think more clearly and slows your speaking pace.

- As you look at someone, physically address that person by turning your entire body towards that person. This will send a message that you're confident, strong and in control.

- Stand tall with your weight evenly distributed between your feet. Slouching or shifting your weight from leg to leg indicates uncertainty. By standing tall, it says you believe in what you are saying. It will also help your upper body stay relaxed and open.

- Avoid leaning on things such as a table, wall or lectern. Also avoid any behaviors that could be perceived as distracting such as playing with change in your pocket or such.

- Keep your hands free of objects (notes, pens, etc.).

- If you walk around while talking or presenting, stop at times and directly face someone to address them (and others) for a few sentences. There should only be three reasons to walk around during a presentation. a.) Walk to a computer to change slides; b.) Walk to the screen to point at something important; c.) Walk to a listener to address that person directly.

- Vocal projection also demonstrates enthusiasm and knowledge. Your voice should be strong and with "an element of variety". Use first names, telling stories and possibly reliving moments that relate to the subject.

Be confident in delivering your message or in speaking to others. It will increase your ability to get your message across. People will be more drawn to your message as well. Enjoy and have fun with your speaking.

And above all, stay inspired my friends.

Hello...Can You Hear Me?

"The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place." ~George Bernard Shaw

Hello out there, can anybody hear me? For that matter, am I listening to know if I can hear anybody out there?

Communication is such a key element of our life's journey. As I was researching for this article, I wanted to understand why often times communication between two people can seem to go so badly. In Merriam-Webster's dictionary, communication is defined as; a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior.

So this would mean we relate to each other through the spoken word, the written word, hand gestures, body movement and also non-verbally. Each of these methods are varied in their application and delivery. They vary from culture to culture, city to city, and even family to family. We all have a learned concept of what communication is and means.

Ignoring those differences in what each of believe is "communication" leads to misunderstandings, arguments, divorce, lawsuits and even war. I certainly wouldn't leave out all of the other things that cause disagreements such as money, possessions, sex, or many other causes. But today we focus on communication.

Not being able to learn how to communicate with other people only increases your chances of having problems with those other people. Like a good or bad attitude, it really starts with you.

Are you willing to slow down and listen? This is probably one of the things I work on the most and most of us need to work on as well.

Think about the old toy you may have created as a child. Two tin cans connected by a long piece of string to create a Tin Can Phone. While it may seem like a silly example, it took cooperation on both ends to get it to work.

For one, both people had to ensure the string remained tight between the cans. If one person leaned in, the string would slacken and nothing could be heard.

Second, if both people started talking at the same time, nothing could be heard. Like a walkie-talkie, the communication is half-duplex, which means only one person can talk and the other has to listen.

Lastly, the person speaking has to speak clearly while the person listening really has to listen carefully. Remember that this is a tin can phone so the quality isn't very good.

But then again, most of our daily conversations with other people is like a tin can phone conversation. Too many times we are talking at the same time and not listening. Too many times we are not speaking clearly enough or in a way to make ourself understood. Too many times we are not cooperating with each other in this two-way conversation. And too many times we simply are not listening closely or with enough attention.

This is when communication breaks down.

So how do we improve our communication with each other then? I think you will find your answers in most everything I said above. There are no easy fixes because a list of "things to do" is not the only answer.

Practicing good communication skills is a start. More important though is learning to slow down and listen more carefully. This doesn't leave out the person talking because speaking clearly, writing, and gesturing are important as well.

Good communication starts with you. You can begin the steps to improve communication between yourself and others. Good communication is a skill that will help as you live the journey of your life....your best life.