Raising the Bar

“One of the most important phases of maturing is that of growth from self-centering to an understanding relationship to others. A person is not mature until he has both an ability and a willingness to see himself as one among others and to do unto those others as he would have them do to him.” - Walter Scott

One key to living a positive and fruitful life is to move away from being self-centered. When you understand that your life is and has impact amongst everything and everyone around you, then you will begin to live a more enjoyable and fulfilling life.

There is a tendency when living a self-centered life to blame every and anything else for our own woes. It is always someone else or company or object that is the cause. The blame game starts to become very trendy in your life. The current object of blame in society becomes your object of blame. It becomes something to accuse of all your troubles.

So it can be an odd feeling to fully grasp the idea when you step out of a "me only" life into acceptance of your part in a bigger world. It is a big step when you end up taking responsibility for your own actions and woes. Everything around you has an impact and influences your life. But the key is how you choose to react to all of the stuff which will and does happen to us.

Once you have taken the path of responsibility and accepted to be in charge of your own attitude, only then will life begin to turn for the better. Once you do, stay committed to that new life. Be the better person.

Be the one that raises the BAR for others.

B-elief A-ction R-ealization of expectation in your life.

Stay inspired my friends!

Responsible Surprise

"You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of." ~Jim Rohn

There was news story a couple of years back from the Atlanta (Georgia, USA) area about a public official who 'took responsibility' after getting called on it. There was a certain appearance of favoritism by police in the handling of the matter. One could likely assume that a regular citizen would have been hauled into the police station without hesitation.

But it was not the handling of the elected officials police warrants that caught my attention. It was the failed personal responsibility of the elected official which resulted in there being outstanding warrants in the first place. This person had written roughly $1000 dollars worth of bad checks. As the story indicated, this person "wrote four bad checks - each for $300 to $400 - at the Costco in Duluth in January 2007."

To put this in context, that was three years prior to the warrants being revealed. The county in which the warrants were issued, were filed January 2008. It was now January 2010 and this commissioner was 'surprised' by the warrants. Do 'bad checks' just disappear in such a way that you would never have known you wrote them? Did the retailer never attempt to contact you or your bank about them? Nothing?

There were probably reasons behind this elected official's issue. Many of those reasons were deflections of it being their own fault. My point though is not to judge this person or ridicule them. My point is to let it serve as an example regarding personal responsibility.

This particular person was given a 'pass' to straighten out the issue. We all deserve a 'pass' to try and work things out as long as we truly take responsibility and correct those things we have done wrong.

Life can be difficult and I am hopeful for all people having a great life. But life also requires us to take personal responsibility for it.

Take responsibility for all you do. Even when the surprise comes along, stand up and take hold of it.

And stay inspired my friends.

Economics of Life

"You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of." -Jim Rohn

With all of the economic troubles piled on top of so many other issues, it will be easy for many people to give up. There will be a lot of folks that take the problems as the source of all their pain. They will say that, 'if only the economy were better; if only my job paid more; if only, if only."

It is a lot to deal with and your ability to fight through it is magnified. But as my friend, Dean Sweetman states, "let us make this the year of the non-victim." Meaning that in spite of all obstacles, don't let yourself become a victim to the circumstances. Take responsibility for your own actions during troubled times and rise above complaint.

The baby boom generation and those generations since, are far removed from the depression era folks. A time when much hardship fell upon people, yet they struggled through. Each took responsibility upon themselves as opposed to waiting for others to act on their behalf.

Yes, certainly there were those standing idly by waiting for a hand out and believing that it was someone else that needed to lift them up. But what was true back in the 1930s is true today; you are responsible for you.

The government will do what it believes right in helping so many people in need. There will be charitable organizations that try as best they can to lift up those most in need. In the end though, it will take you rising above complaint by ridding your victim mentality. Only then will you lift your life to something better.

The economy of the United States and of many countries around the world are troubled. As an individual, that much is out of your control. But you do have control of your life and what you can do. So much of our success depends upon your attitude and by how well you get through your circumstances in life.

Know that much of it is out of your control on a macro-level. But you do have control of your life and your ability to change it. Be a 'non-victim' this year and see your world transformed.

Stay inspired my friends!

Calling for Help

"Responsibility's like a string we can only see the middle of. Both ends are out of sight.." -William McFee

It was March 13, 1964 on a New York street when Kitty Genovese was slowly and brutally stabbed to death. There were by police accounts at least a dozen people in the neighborhood that heard her screams. Over the course of a 90-minute period, her attacker was frightened away at one point, only to return and finally kill her.

Yet not once during that period did any neighbor assist her, or even telephone the police. Later reports from witnesses indicated they thought it was merely a lovers' quarrel. In many respects the responsibility we have for ourselves and for the needs of others can fall short. In this case, Kitty perished and we provide excuses for doing nothing.

Does this story illustrate that we should take the law into our own hands?

No, but what the story does illustrate is that we as individuals need to do "something" when we see, hear or witness a wrong being done. The problem is that too many of us are wrapped up in our smartphone ear plugs, watching the latest video of a cat doing something silly.

In the above incident, it prompted two psychologists, Darly and Latane, to study the conditions under which people may or may not offer assistance to others in an emergency. They staged an experiment around a woman in distress. They found that 70 percent of the people who were alone at the time called out or went to help the woman after they believed she had fallen and was hurt. Interestingly though, when there were other people in the room only 40 percent offered help.

When others are around, apparently it is not my problem.

Too many times we fail to take responsibility for what is happening around us. And I do not mean to say that we have to solve all of the ills that exist in every corner of the world. But we should be responsible humans, watching out for each other and not just ourselves. Life is not a series of personal song playlists and funny cat videos.

Life is an interaction of humans, taking care of each other. We are responsible for our own actions of course, but we are also responsible people. That means all of us have a responsibility to serve, protect and nurture those around us.

But why you might ask?

Only because it might be you calling for help one day.

Stay inspired my friends.

Do The Right Thing

"Each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible. " -Viktor E. Frankl

I am finding it hard to understand what I am hearing in the news lately. Now granted it is unlikely that I can know what is in another person's heart. Also know that I'm really working hard not to get judgemental about what I am going to say here.

The story surrounding what happened around and on the grounds of the Penn State football facilities is horrifying enough. A sexual predator destroying the lives of eight or nine young boys that we know of. It will be very hard and a long process for those young men to go through in recovering from his sordid actions.

What bothers me also are the actions, or in-action of people that could have stopped him sooner. As far back as 1998 there were people that could have done something. Recently a head football coach, a man that leads college-aged men onto a playing field, teaching them to do the right things in life, didn't do that. He simply told a higher authority in the college and then washed his hands of it.

These were horrible, despicable and illegal activities; informing legal authorities was the responsible thing to do. Now we have the uncovering of a supposed cover-up and even more grief for the young boys that were molested. The sexual predator has been arrested, the head football coach says he will retire at the end of the season.

The right thing to do happened though, he was fired along with the University President by the University Board of Trustees. No more leading men onto the field of play, no more roles in being responsible for their success due to his failure to be responsible. That has taken away any privilege he may have felt or wanted in retiring on his own terms. He lost that when he failed to do the right thing.

This story is not one that I want to make all about a football coach losing his job. The story is about those boys molested by a man entrusted that did very irresponsible things. The lives harmed could have been limited if others had done the right thing. By choosing wrong, even more lives have been altered and harmed as well.

We don't always get it right, that I get. Each of us have choices to make in life. Sometimes those choices are right and sometimes we make the wrong ones. If we hide things in the dark, they only fester like an open wound, never to experience true healing.

In the end, we must do what is right, what is responsible and what will move life forward.

Enter At Your Own Risk

You've seen them, disclaimers ranging from the simple to the most complicated legal jargon one could imagine. Many times these are meant to protect the 'issuer' from any responsibility. Seems a little odd that someone would put forth something and then not want to take any responsibility for it. Here you go Mr. Customer, this really isn't very safe but please buy it and if it causes harm, well its not our fault.

One then has to think about the other side of this coin we've created. A product designed to remove stains in white clothes. Of course, its bleach. Yet someone decides that if it works on clothes, maybe it will clean the ink stains on my arm. They use it in an improper manner getting a rash or burn on their skin. They blame or take legal action. Well Mr. Seller, you didn't tell me I couldn't use it that way and its not my fault.

In Ireland, there is an old castle in Blarney that I have visited many times. As you approach the doorway to go in the actual castle, there is one of those typical "ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK" signs. The kind that many of us simply ignore. But as you walk through this place, you really could quite easily hurt yourself. It is unlike in the U.S. where these signs are posted. And with that there is every conceivable safety device to keep you from harming yourself.

I find it amusing because the sign in Ireland is more real and forces you to truly accept responsibility. Yes, you could hurt yourself but we are allowing you to see this magnificent old building. Whereas in the U.S., you are warned and all the safety devices are there but it exists to protect them from the legal fight that will occur when you get a splinter from dragging your hand down a wooden banister.

There are many versions and variations that swing from one end of the spectrum to the other. What I marvel at is that we work so very hard at avoiding personal responsibility for things. I'm not suggesting that there are no valid reasons on either side, but I do believe again that personal responsibility needs higher consideration.

Personal responsibility is something each of us should have and consider in all that we do. If we are the producer of something, are we doing everything we can to ensure it is safe and appropriate. If we are the consumer of something, are we using it in a safe and appropriate manner. It also goes for decisions and actions we take in life. Are we taking responsibility for our own actions whether it be our attitude, our work or our family?

The only thing we had no choice in was being born. But living life itself is full of risk. All of us live that life and "ENTER AT OUR OWN RISK" until the day we don't. Assume responsibility for your own life. Choose to live life with a great attitude and willingness to make it better for others. The 'risks' are well worth it.

One Small Cigarette Butt

“You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself. That is something you have charge of.” -Jim Rohn

You have seen it most anywhere that you go. Cigarette butts laying near the intersections of our roads, along the curbs of sidewalks and tossed down the alleys of our cities. It is a habit of so many people to toss these out the window. It makes one wonder if those particular cars came without ash trays. Again, if they did, we have all seen someone pulling up and dumping their ash tray on the ground.

It may be that these people believe cigarette filters are biodegradable. In fact, cigarette butts are not biodegradable in the sense that most people think of the word. The acetate filters can take many years to decompose.

According to the CigaretteLitter.Org folks, "What happens after that butt gets casually flicked onto the street, nature trail, or beach? Typically wind and rain carry the cigarette into the water supply, where the toxic chemicals the cigarette filter was designed to trap leak out into aquatic ecosystems, threatening the quality of the water and many aquatic lifeforms. Cigarette butts may seem small, but with several trillion butts littered every year, the toxic chemicals add up!"

The Ocean Conservancy compiled results of a shoreline cleanup day conducted by volunteers in 68 countries. It covered a combined 34,000 miles of shoreline and collected 7 million pounds of litter, 80 percent of which had been washed from land into the water. Of the 7.7 million items of debris collected worldwide in 2006, cigarettes and cigarette butts accounted for roughly 1.9 million, the sixth consecutive year they have topped the list.

Within cities, the cost to clean up these small and seemingly insignificant eye sores is astounding. In San Francisco, annual clean up costs run close to $11 million; a cost that is shared by taxpayers. It is $11 million that could go to parks, school funding or other needed public services. But there are many that only consider themselves.

In surveys, many smokers blame their littering behavior on a lack of well-placed bins for cigarette butts. Yet, would these same people toss a cigarette out at the curb of their home. There is no handy trash bin available along their driveway at home, so is it littered with cigarette butts. Somehow I doubt that is the case.

Ashtrays have been available in cars for quite a few years. The excuse of no nearby trash bin doesn't work for the car driver. Although the mindset not to dirty their own property, the one that keeps them from dirtying the ash tray in their car is the same one that thinks nothing of tossing a cigarette butt elsewhere.

The point here is not to pick just on smokers as there is plenty to go around. The point is to take responsibility for life around you. That we each need to look beyond our own self and see how everything we do impacts others. Taking others into consideration in making decisions improves life for all. It improves your life even greater then being self-centered. It isn't all about you. It is about all of us.

There will be disagreement from others and those that look outward will continue to do so. The idea is to stop for a moment and think about your actions. Taking responsibility in this small area will mean responsibility in bigger areas of your life. Be a bigger, more responsible person and see it change your life for the better.