Burning Yourself

A recent article in Readers Digest - "Burned Out", a story unfolds regarding how we tend to be the 'do all' people. Between family activities, trying to get ahead at work, being the charity worker and getting to the gym to stay healthy - there just doesn't seem to be enough time during the day.

Yet it isn't time that is a factor. The same amount of seconds, minutes and hours still exist within a 24 hour period as did when time was first measured. As individuals, we are the ones that fill up the seconds of our day. And as you may have noted, I said the 'seconds' of our day. For those that are nearing burnout have pushed themselves to the point of having to count the seconds.

With the stress comes increasing mental and physical fatigue. Your job suffers, your friends suffer, your family suffers and you suffer. There are many symptoms and signs that any short search of the internet or talking to your family doctor can help reveal.

While the Readers Digest article concentrates on 'burn out' at work, stress and 'burn out' can happen to anyone that stretches themselves too thin, trying to be the 'all and everything.' To overcome burnout, the article suggests the following eight recommendations. For more detail on each, I'd suggest reading the article.

- Make time for yourself
- Develop a method to calm yourself
- Analyze what you love and hate about your work (or whatever it is your are doing)
- Settle for less than perfect
- Take good care of yourself
- Cultivate a support network (those fish net connections I've talked about)
- Set limits (saying 'no' is a valid answer)
- Plan for the future

American author Natalie Goldberg is quoted as saying, “Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath. Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. Nothing is that important. Just lie down.” Maybe take seven minutes out of your day...and yes, that is only 420 seconds...to relax and think about it.

Mending Fishing Nets

"Repairing Fishing Nets"
- photography by Don Kon

Your life is like a series of connections, like the knots of a fishing net. Each knot is a relationship with another person. As these knots or connections grow, the larger the net becomes. Your impact on other peoples lives grows as well.

But you can't simply create a connection and forget about it. Each knot of the net has to be tended to. When a weak spot develops, a hole can develop. Not only your relationship but a piece of your life slips through.

When this happens, what is left will be difficult to gather back in. So mending and caring for each connection is important.

These relationships are more important than having all of the money in the world. These relationships define who you are. An old saying goes something like this, "he who dies with the most toys wins." But the reality of it is that "he who dies with the most toys still dies."

Tend to your life net connections, those relationships that will improve your life and others. The net will be there when you fall and help you when you recover. It will impact and connect many people to many others. It is your impact on other lives that will mean the most when life ends...a lasting memory to guide others when you are long gone.

Seventh Day

A day of relaxation, a day of reflection and a day to rejuvenate for a new week. You take time out through out your week to catch your breath. It is a necessary part of everything we do in life. The frustrations can build due to work, family issues or the everyday things that life throws at you.

With good attitude and a cheerful spirit, most days pass with an ability to see it through. You may even find yourself using my belief in a 'seven minutes a day' to stop and reflect. But on the seventh day, which may be a Saturday or Sunday, it may be any day that fits into your life schedule. The seventh day should be used to stop and regroup your self.

I would not be so bold to say that life goes after others, it comes after me and those around me as well. Each of us has to take time to re-gather our thoughts. To build ourselves back up for another round of taking on life. It gets easier as you go on in life. You find moments during the day that you can use, those seven minutes, that will work well for you.

The English author Ashleigh Brilliant once said, “Try to relax and enjoy the crisis.” Life is a series of mini-crisis as some may say. I say if you take time out each day and also provide a day for yourself, life will be much grander. Take time for yourself and you will be better prepared to impact others.

After The Job

Last night, I attended a gathering of people to help celebrate the retirement of a long-time co-worker. This man worked for nearly 25 years at the same company as me, having put in seventeen previous to this one at a different company.

He is a man that I had interactions with at various points in my own career with each of us at different positions along the way. He was always there with a smile, a bit of cheer in his voice and from what I could tell, goodness in his heart.

As it is with retirement and people moving on from the life of a career job, each of us will move on to new things in our life. The people you once worked with will slip into the past with our memories. We will remember each other and from time to time reconnect. Yet having known each other enrichens our lives. It helps shape who we've become and what we will continue to be.

As you go about your work day, know that one day you will retire or move on to other things. Create goodness in all that you do. It will impact those you work with for a life time. Thank you Ray for the daily smile and good word. Enjoy your life and the memories will live on.

“Life's truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way.”