Movie Backdrops

“Just when you think that a person is just a backdrop for the rest of the universe, watch them and see that they laugh, they cry, they tell jokes...they're just friends waiting to be made.” - Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein

There are many people in the world you pass by each day. As you drive down the street or walk through the store. So many different people going about their daily life.

You see these people, you smile and exchange quick greetings.

Day after day these people fill your world. They are part of all that happens around you. You can become oblivious to their existence in the background of your life. And the fact remains you are a movie prop existing in the background of their lives as well.

It would be great if we could stop and take a look at others not as a background movie prop but as a potential friend. A friend who has a good thing to say to you. Or maybe someone to offer their support when in need.

With so many people in this world, having a friend around every corner is a pretty comforting thought.

Create new friends from the everyday background of your life.

Every one of them will count as a great new addition to your life. And stay inspired my friends!

Welcome To The Gang

“Just when you think that a person is just a backdrop for the rest of the universe, watch them and see that they laugh, they cry, they tell jokes...they're just friends waiting to be made.” - Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein

There are lots of people in the world you pass by each day. As you drive down the street or walk through the store going about your daily life.

Those people you see; you smile and exchange a quick greeting.

Day by day these people fill your world and are a part of all that happens around you. It can become easy to be oblivious to their existence. The fact remains you become a "movie prop" in the background from their perspective as well.

Maybe we should stop and look at others not as "movie props" but as potential friends.

A friend who has a good thing to say or someone to offer support when in need. With so many people moving about in the world, having a friend around every corner is a pretty comforting thought.

Try to create new friends from the everyday background of your life. Every one of them will count as a great new addition to your life.

And stay inspired my friends!

Standing Together

“Together we stand, together we fall, together we fight and fight for it all.”
- Unknown

There are times of exhilarating fun and enjoyment in life. Friends playing cards while talking of events past and future. The laughing and cajoling as each connects with the other in a community of togetherness.

It is in those moments, those connections we forge a bond that will bring us through the tough times and the really tough times. It gives us the strength to lean on each other, to cry, to worry but also to hope.

It would be great if we could walk the same path forever.

We walk for periods of time with each other, supporting, carrying, encouraging and simply being there on the journey. Time, circumstance and life itself changes our paths and we are unable to do anything to prevent it.

What we can do is make the most of our time together.

To make them great times.
To make it time well spent.
To have been there for each other.

I sense the path changing and it increases my anxiety over what lay ahead. I have my friends still on the path with me and I will enjoy every moment with them. They comfort me as I know I comfort them. We each dream for a lifetime to walk together until we can no longer walk. And we know that our walk together will have been forged in eternity.

When we stand together, we may fall together but we will pick ourselves up and fight, fight, fight for it all.

Stay inspired my friends.

Being a Friend

Lessons in Friendship by Mark Palmer

“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” - Walter Winchell

Each of us have so much that we can give to others but tend to forget we have the ability to do so. It is an ability to brighten and make a difference in someones life. It is a small thing such as simply being a friend when others have left the room.

Being a friend can mean listening and offering encouragement.

Being a friend can mean lifting up that person when they are discouraged.

Being a friend can also mean being real in your answers to them. Which means being able to say "stop the self pity, get up and get moving."

Pure friendship is solid and supportive. You know that you could lose the person you are helping, but knowing that if it makes a positive change in their life, you're okay with that. This type of friendship works because it comes from your heart.

Why? Because it is about them and not about you.

Try to be a friend to someone and help them make a change in their life. Remember though, you don't change people, they change themselves. But being a friend will give them the ability to make the change in their own lives.

Stay inspired my friends.

Friends and Family

“I would rather walk with a friend in the dark, than alone in the light.”
― Helen Keller

The painting above is called "Luncheon of the Boating Party" by Renoir. I love the painting for its simple view of people gathering. There are formal and non-formal interactions going on. There is a sense of care and ease among those gathered.

It reminds me very much of a gathering you or I may have. A gathering of friends for a game of cards maybe. These gatherings throughout our lives are those in which we need family and friends to be part of.

We need them for the comfort and support they bring.

We need them for the advice and encouragement we can not get by ourselves.

It is the community of relationships we have that makes our lives better. On the spokes of your wheel, this is the social and family strength to move through life.

Take the time to meet with others and envelope yourself in the warmth of friendship. Your days will be better, your spirit will be lifted, and your life will be renewed.

Stay inspired my friends!

Friends Around Your Table

The friends around the table, St. Jacut

"Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival." - C. S. Lewis

As I sit writing this morning, there is a cool breeze through the open window. The sounds of the gathering day echo from the street below. It is my last morning in Curitiba, Brazil and those sounds are different but also quite familiar to the ear. While the language is Portuguese, the ebb and flow is very comforting.

A laborer power washing a building wall.

A woman shuffling her children into the car.

A plane in the distance approaching to land at the local airport.

The other is the sound of our families former neighbors and good friends Annie and Dave Spell. It is here to Brazil that they moved over a year ago. It is here that they now call home in Curitiba. It is amusing to me that I have flown 4691 miles in order to see my neighbors.

Yet friendship has that ability, to cross thousands of miles in separation or to simply cross the street. Friendship is a powerful part of our lives as humans.

In an article by Tarra Conte, she outlines five important values of having friendship with others.

Concern: a matter that engages a person's attention, interest, or care, or that affects a person's welfare or happiness.

Compassion: a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.

Honesty: truthfulness, sincerity, or frankness. You may have heard that this is the best policy, even if the truth hurts.

Understanding: a state of cooperative or mutually tolerant relations between people. The word "tolerant" in this definition made me laugh.

Support: to sustain (a person, the mind, spirits, courage, etc.) under trial or affliction.

For my wife and I, friends matter. And whether they be friends found around the kitchen table, neighbors living around the corner from you or living thousands of miles away in Brazil; our connection to others is what makes living life great.

I hope the same for each of you. That life presents you with a large basket full of friends, near and far. For you not only have friends, but you are also a friend to them.

Stay friendly my friends!

SIDE NOTE: Our friends Dave and Annie Spell are doing great missions work in Brazil, working with Ps Ronald Berg and the C3 Church Curitiba. If you wish to support their efforts, a small (or large) donation is greatly appreciated. For those in the United States, your gift is tax deductible.

Blow Thou Winter Wind

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ―Steve Maraboli

Only a few more days left in this year and for those in the northern hemisphere, winter's cold wind blows with a cold fierceness. It is a time when emotions can get the better of us. The lamentations of another year gone by can consume our thoughts of perceived failures.

It is easy to sit and question the wrongs we feel others may have exacted upon us. We can let past wrongs consume our future as the cold wind howls outside. Thoughts of how thankless and false love and friendship can be will creep into our minds. It seems as if all life is made up of human ingratitude.

We pull our coats tight in order to fight the winter winds. But the idea that people can be thankless is worse than the harshness of that same winter wind. We allow these thoughts to take over and debilitate us.

What should never be forgotten is that life is worth living. One should move forward, be happy, forgive and forget the failings of others. Forgive your own failings.

Shift your thinking and your world will shift for the better.

Blow, Blow, Thou Winter Wind
by William Shakespeare

Blow, blow, thou winter wind,
Thou art not so unkind
As man's ingratitude;
Thy tooth is not so keen
Because thou art not seen,
Although thy breath be rude.
Heigh-ho! sing heigh-ho! unto the green holly:
Most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
Then, heigh-ho! the holly!
This life is most jolly.
Freeze, freeze, thou bitter sky,
Thou dost not bite so nigh
As benefits forgot:
Though thou the waters warp,
Thy sting is not so sharp
As friend remember'd not.
Heigh-ho! sing heigh-ho! unto the green holly:
Most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
Then, heigh-ho! the holly!
This life is most jolly.

Stay inspired my friends!

Two Hands

"A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down." -Arnold H. Glasow

I have had friends through out the years of my life that would fit the above quote perfectly. These people are ones that I hold close in my heart although many of them I have drifted from. With family and job changes, the miles and time seem to fill the gap. But I can truly say that these friends have helped shape my life.

I recently read a story to which I can't find an attribution or even how true the story is. But it does speak of friendship and what one will do for the other.

In WW1 an English soldier watched in horror how his lifelong friend fell under gunfire. All the soldiers had to retreat. The soldier went to ask permission from the lieutenant to go and fetch his friend from the no-mans-land.

The lieutenant gave permission, but added: "It is hardly worth it. Your friend is probably dead and you may die too."

The soldier did not care about the warnings and miraculously he did reach his friend, lifted him to his shoulders and stumbled back. He was wounded in the process.

The lieutenant helped them to safety and noticed the soldier´s friend was dead. "I am sorry for your friend - but I told you it was not worth it. Your friend is dead and now you are also seriously wounded."

"I have to disagree with you. It was worth it", the soldier answered.

"What ever do you mean?" the lieutenant wondered.

"It was worth it", the soldier repeated. "When I got to my friend, he was still alive and said ´Jim, I knew you would never leave me.´

The friendships you receive in life are gifts. They keep you grounded when you begin to fly too high in self. They help pull you up off the ground when life is trying to bury you.

We know that these friendships will go through stages of closeness and also distance. But if you can point back to those that made a difference, then you are truly blessed.

For me I can count them on two hands. Two hands by which I can clench and stand my ground when circumstance tries to knock me down. Two hands to reach out and pull them up when they need me.

Remember your friends on this day, remember your friends tomorrow. Most of all, remember to be a friend.

A Friend

"But friendship is precious, not only in the shade, but in the sunshine of life, and thanks to a benevolent arrangement the greater part of life is sunshine." ~Thomas Jefferson

A friend from high school sent the following to me and found it a great way to start the week. Eric and I haven't probably seen each other since graduation in 1978. A long time to pass between folks, but great to know each is doing well. But onto the subject of friends and first the story.

~~~~~~~~~~

A man and his dog were walking along a road. The man was enjoying the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead.

He remembered dying, and that the dog walking beside him had been dead for years. He wondered where the road was leading them.

After a while, they came to a high, white stone wall along one side of the road. It looked like fine marble... At the top of a long hill, it was broken by a tall arch that glowed in the sunlight.

When he was standing before it he saw a magnificent gate in the arch that looked like mother-of-pearl, and the street that led to the gate looked like pure gold. He and the dog walked toward the gate, and as he got closer, he saw a man at a desk to one side.

When he was close enough, he called out, 'Excuse me, where are we?'

'This is Heaven, sir,' the man answered.. 'Wow! Would you happen to have some water?' the man asked.

Of course, sir. Come right in, and I'll have some ice water brought right up. 'The man gestured, and the gate began to open.

'Can my friend,' gesturing toward his dog, 'come in, too?' the traveler asked.

'I'm sorry, sir, but we don't accept pets.'

The man thought a moment and then turned back toward the road and continued the way he had been going with his dog.

After another long walk, and at the top of another long hill, he came to a dirt road leading through a farm gate that looked as if it had never been closed. There was no fence

As he approached the gate, he saw a man inside, leaning against a tree and reading a book.

'Excuse me!' he called to the man. 'Do you have any water?'

'Yeah, sure, there's a pump over there, come on in.'

'How about my friend here?' the traveler gestured to the dog.

'There should be a bowl by the pump.'

They went through the gate, and sure enough, there was an old-fashioned hand pump with a bowl beside it.

The traveler filled the water bowl and took a long drink himself, then he gave some to the dog.

When they were full, he and the dog walked back toward the man who was standing by the tree.

'What do you call this place?' the traveler asked.

'This is Heaven,' he answered.

'Well, that's confusing,' the traveler said. 'The man down the road said that was Heaven, too.'

'Oh, you mean the place with the gold street and pearly gates? Nope. That's hell.'

'Doesn't it make you mad for them to use your name like that?'

'No, we're just happy that they screen out the folks who would leave their best friends behind.'

~~~~~~~~~~ 

The story gives us one view to what friendship means.  That you would not leave them behind.  And we get faced with these types of decisions in our life.  Sometimes your hand is forced to leave a good friend behind should that person be pulling you down in life.  But you can always pull a friend up in life.  Its a choice that can be rather difficult to make.

In the email string that contained the story above also spoke to why someone would forward these stories.

- When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do? You forward jokes.

- When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep contact, you forward jokes.
- When you have something to say, but don't know what and don't know how, you forward jokes.

Of course there are lots of reasons, but keeping in touch can mean so much.  A simple hello, a quick 'thinking of you' or touching base with someone can lift them at a moment when you least expect.

So keep hold of your friends, try to keep them in your life as each of your journeys unfold.

Extra Kindness - Being A Friend

A large part of my life involves the encouragement of others and trying to lift them up beyond where they are or want to be. I just tend to think each of us can make life a little more pleasant for those we come in contact with.

And perfect, I'm not even close to it and understand that life isn't necessarily a pursuit of perfection. It is more of a pursuit and improving oneself, giving of oneself leaving things in the wake of your path just a little better.

One of my co-workers is involved with a group that is being phased out. He will and has moved on to another project, but with his remaining responsibility, he is doing what he can to help these individuals move on. The people involved losing their jobs are talented and wonderful people. Business has simply changed the course of their lives. Yet here, a single person in the bigger picture is taking the time to care and help.

This is what I mean, taking the extra effort to help others beyond your own circumstance. He will leave a lasting impression on those people. Something inside him is made of goodness and it may seem simple of me to say, but that goodness is worth so much more in the big scheme of our lives.

I was given a gift recently with a quote inside the front cover. It came as a gracious gift from friends on my wife and I. The people giving it have gone through some of the toughest times anyone should have to endure. We supported them in ways that only friends can do. Each of us need the support and kindness. Their thankfulness said it all in this particular quote which read, "In troubled times, the caring of a friend falls softly like a gentle rain."

Try to be a friend to those you meet, go just a step further to show kindness and thoughtfulness to others. It will be returned to you in ways you will never imagine.

To Light Your Way Home

From the folks at Apple Blossom Art

Coming home, it is a wonderful feeling when one has been on the road. Whether it be a short trip down the road to another city, or a long journey to another country, returning is always a comforting event.

As much as we try to expand our horizons with new experiences and places, we tend to be 'home bodies' at heart. Home is the one place where you will always find those closest to you. The wife or husband, father or mother, child or friend that know you most dearly.

When I travel, the vast majority of people that I run into are friendly, helping and genuinely ready to assist. But the hotels are different from my own house, the food is different from my wife's cooking and the sounds or atmosphere does not have the same familiar feel. Always I come back and can slow down from the hectic pace, to be amongst close family and friends.

In your daily life, many of the stresses you encounter can be absolved simply by coming home. Don't make your home a stressful one, try to make it a comforting one that nourishes and rejuvenates the soul. “The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned," was said by Maya Angelou. Build a home that you will always ache for when you are not there.

I myself am coming home and will write again as soon as I am able to. Enjoy your weekend and enjoy your time at home with loved ones.