Fourth Down and One

"To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing." -Unknown

The two teams were in overtime, playing a heated rivalry football game. The score was knotted together at twenty-three to twenty-three with plenty of momentum on one side. The offense had fallen upon a fourth down with less than one yard to go for the first down. The ball was on their own twenty-nine yard line.

Here the easy decision could have been simple, punt and wait for another chance. The hard decision though was to try and go for it. If they made the first down, momentum would have clearly swung their way. If they did not make it, the opposing team would have an easy field goal and win.

The teams lined up, excitement grew as the quarterback barked out the call. Huge men came crashing together trying to outdo the other as the running back took hold of the ball. Into the mix of bodies he went, trying to search out those few precious feet. To no avail, he was stopped short of the first down marker, short of the goal that would allow them to continue.

The opposing team had stopped them on "4th and 1" and went on to kick the game winning field goal. One team victorious and another defeated. All of this drama played out for a mere two or three feet.

Sometimes we get that close to our own goals in life. One, two or three feet is all that seperates us from achievement. As we make our final push to cross over that line, we get pushed back, defeated and rejected. It seems during those few moments that all is lost.

But not all is lost, there is hope, there is strength in knowledge of what went wrong. There is greatness in moving forward and trying again. The obstacles in life we face sometimes get the better of us. Even when we felt we were unstoppable, even when we had the greatest of confidence in our own ability, the opposition will win sometimes.

So you withdraw, replan and then reattack the goal. You jump back into it with new experience and understanding. You keep trying.

Life and Camping

Camping Under The Stars 3 - Wayne England

"At the height of laughter, the universe is flung into a kaleidoscope of new possibilities." -Jean Houston

There is the story of the famed and fictional character Sherlock Holmes and his partner, Dr. Watson. If you have not read or seen any movies about them, I encourage you to read some of the stories.

One such story has our famous Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson going on a camping trip. After a good meal and chat around the campfire, they laid down for the night, and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?" Holmes asked,Watson pondered for a minute.

"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke. "Watson, you have missed the point. Somebody has stolen our tent!"

Sometimes we get caught up in the vastness of all that is going on in life. The twenty-four hour news giving us the latest happenings. From a bridge across the St. Croix River in Minnesota to couples rushing to marry in China on this the eleventh day of the eleventh month of the year 2011.

With all of this going on, the simple answers, the simple news might just be what is going on right in front of us. Don't get caught up in the magnitude of that is going on. The world is not "going to H-E-Double Hockey Sticks" as some might say. Life is just happening, just as the millions of stars have been in the sky for millions of years.

Take a moment and laugh. Take a moment and relax. Take a moment and just enjoy it.

Do The Right Thing

"Each man is questioned by life; and he can only answer to life by answering for his own life; to life he can only respond by being responsible. " -Viktor E. Frankl

I am finding it hard to understand what I am hearing in the news lately. Now granted it is unlikely that I can know what is in another person's heart. Also know that I'm really working hard not to get judgemental about what I am going to say here.

The story surrounding what happened around and on the grounds of the Penn State football facilities is horrifying enough. A sexual predator destroying the lives of eight or nine young boys that we know of. It will be very hard and a long process for those young men to go through in recovering from his sordid actions.

What bothers me also are the actions, or in-action of people that could have stopped him sooner. As far back as 1998 there were people that could have done something. Recently a head football coach, a man that leads college-aged men onto a playing field, teaching them to do the right things in life, didn't do that. He simply told a higher authority in the college and then washed his hands of it.

These were horrible, despicable and illegal activities; informing legal authorities was the responsible thing to do. Now we have the uncovering of a supposed cover-up and even more grief for the young boys that were molested. The sexual predator has been arrested, the head football coach says he will retire at the end of the season.

The right thing to do happened though, he was fired along with the University President by the University Board of Trustees. No more leading men onto the field of play, no more roles in being responsible for their success due to his failure to be responsible. That has taken away any privilege he may have felt or wanted in retiring on his own terms. He lost that when he failed to do the right thing.

This story is not one that I want to make all about a football coach losing his job. The story is about those boys molested by a man entrusted that did very irresponsible things. The lives harmed could have been limited if others had done the right thing. By choosing wrong, even more lives have been altered and harmed as well.

We don't always get it right, that I get. Each of us have choices to make in life. Sometimes those choices are right and sometimes we make the wrong ones. If we hide things in the dark, they only fester like an open wound, never to experience true healing.

In the end, we must do what is right, what is responsible and what will move life forward.

Asteroids and Opportunity

 

"Sometimes you have close calls and don't think anything of it, but it's a near miss really." -John Dilling

It was a close call last night (11/08/2011) at 6:28 PM on the east coast of the United States. Actually a close call for all of the planet. A rather large and imposing asteroid came within 201,700 miles of hitting the Earth. That is closer to the Earth than the orbit of the Moon.

This deep space visitor named 2005 YU55 paid us a visit and many of us didn't even realize it passed by. NASA sent microwaves onto the asteroid from a radio telescope near Barstow, California in order to reflect and receive greater details about the asteroid. I am pretty sure there were many other agencies doing the same thing.

This isn't the first time it has passed by and it will not be the last time. Its elliptical orbit takes it deep into space and was only discovered in 2005. Hence the name given as "2005 YU55" and this is the closest it has come for at least the last 200 years. It won't come close again for at least another 100 years according to scientists.

What amazes me is that we have "near misses" everyday in many different ways. Things happen in our world and life that we are totally unaware of most the time. There are ripples of life flowing through out our days that we ride through without a moments notice. Only when we start worrying about them do we feel the anxiety.

We could worry about any and every thing going on. A tree bending in the wind might fall and do damage. The tire on our car might go flat while driving down the freeway. The sun might explode, the earth may stop rotating, the 2012 predictions might come true, or any one of a million things.

You have to keep living life and let a large part of that worry go. Maybe that worry you are doing is keeping you from meeting opportunity in life. Maybe those near misses are opportunities you failed to encounter because you were sitting alone, hiding from possibility.

Your movement in life creates the chance you will meet up with great things. The intersection of inspiration and achievement can not be entered by doing nothing. The road to it may have some hardship and pain. But that road will also teach, strengthen, and grow your life. That road will prepare you.

Don't allow yourself to miss out on possibility in life. Don't let those near-misses happen. The asteroid "2005 YU55" may one day turn from a "near miss" into a "direct hit" with the earth. But we can not sit around and worry, we have to get on with the business of living life.

Stay inspired my friends.

Five Steps

"You just have to keep on doing what you do. It's the lesson I get from my husband; he just says, Keep going. Start by starting." -Meryl Streep

In a previous article titled In-Between Bits, I wrote about how nice it would be to start towards a goal and than immediately cross the finish. There would be so much we could accomplish if we could do away with all of the "in-between bits" of life.

If we are unable to skip all of that, maybe there is an easy way to get to where we want to be. So I started searching for ways to get me faster from the START of something to the FINISH of it. I wanted to know what the shortest distance was between having a goal and achieving it.

Somehow I stumbled upon the realization that there are only "five steps" to accomplish anything. There were of course three-step programs, seven-step plans, ten-step courses, and even one-step curriculums to get you there faster.

By far it seemed that the shortest route would take five steps though. There are five steps to fighting stress, five steps to accomplishing my goals, and five steps safer health care. Lucky for me, there are five step programs to better fitness, or to building my network of business contacts.

I found five steps to choosing child care and my grown adult children would be bemused to wonder why I'm looking for child care, (just doing research). There are only five steps to painless inventory management. I can only imagine what pain must be felt when trying to manage inventory.

To help me write better, there are five steps to writing argument essays, which will convince you I am correct in what this blog article is saying. Or I could take five easy steps and solve Europe's debt crisis.

There are only five steps to configuring privacy on Google Plus, great putting in golf, marketing my website, or to giving quality interviews. And if it were to happen by some strange medical oddity, I can be ready in five steps to have a healthy pregnancy

What is it about the number five? What is so significant about this one number?

The number five in religion is referred to as the Five Holy Wounds or Five Sacred Wounds that are believed to be the five piercing wounds that was suffered during the crucifixion of Jesus.

In ancient Greece, philosophers such as Aristotle believed the universe was made up of five elements: water, earth, air, fire, and ether. In radio communication, the term "five by five" is used to indicate perfect signal strength and clarity.

If you look at the keyboard (non touch screen users), nearly all devices with a numeric keypad (telephones, computers, etc.), the five key has a raised dot or raised bar to make typing easier. Knowing where that key is you can easily find the other numbers surrounding it.

I dug even deeper and found that a large majority of mammals, amphibians and reptiles have 5 fingers and/or toes on each extremity. Heck, we as humans have five appendages from the torso: two arms, two legs, and a head.

There are five oceans in the world, the Atlantic, Arctic, Indian, Pacific, and Antartic. We have five senses: Sight, Smell, Hearing, Touch, and Taste. And there are five basic tastes: Sweet, Salty, Sour, Bitter, and Savory.

Maybe not perfectly and possibly with an accent, but I can say five in different languages such as Spanish (Cinco), French (Cinq), Italian (Cinque), German (Fünf), and Dutch (Vijf).

Confucius even said, "To practice five things under all circumstances constitutes perfect virtue; these five are gravity, generosity of soul, sincerity, earnestness, and kindness."

After all of my research though there was an important and overriding thing I learned. Regardless of how many steps we believe are needed to accomplish something in life, there is one that is the most important. That one and most important step is your first one.

So whether you are looking to start a five-step, ten-step or even do the two-step (random two-step dance video), begin your journey with that first step.

Shiny Things

“It is not needful for our dreams to be very grand nor very big. It is only needful for our dreams to be very shiny.” ― C. JoyBell C.

We have some very good friends that are absolutely wonderful people. We share meals and coffee, laughter and pensive moments both with this couple. They are just what friends are supposed to be.

A couple of months ago, the wife part of this couple had cancer reappear after laying dormants for twenty plus years. It has been a roller coaster of emotions and health to say the least. With the radiation treatments she is undergoing along with her chemo, the inevitable loss of hair has started.

So one day my wife and her were talking about the loss of hair. She was tired of the clumps and general care needed. For most every woman I have known, hair is a very personal thing. But to combat it, she had made the decision to shave it all off. Jokingly she told my wife that a hair appointment would be made for her as well.

My wife got to thinking about this and thought maybe this could be a nice way to show support for our friend. Again, doing something such as this is not something anyone would take lightly. My wife thought heavily and seriously about her decision. She made her decision to stand in support of her friend, it was final.

So all of her beautiful blond locks were removed and her hair was shipped off to another great place called Locks of Love. I recommend you find out more about this organization to see the great work they do.

As for my wife, she now has a shiny skin-covered noggin that beams forth in beauty. If you look up the definition of the word noggin, it not only means "one's head" but it was originally meant to describe a "small cup or mug."

This got me to thinking that my wife's gift of shaving her head was not just a shiny bald head in support and encouragement of her friend. It was more like a "small cup" of kindness filled with great promise and miracles. It is a shiny cup filled with dreams and visions for a long and wonderful life.

Just maybe it is not the shiny new head but this shiny cup of wonder that each of us need to carry around in life. A small or large cup of hope, kindness, promises and dreams that will lift us beyond what is trying to hold us back today.

I say order up a cup of the shiny dreams you want fulfilled in your life. Carry it around with you and see that miracles can occur.

Getting Over the Bridge

"When a decision has to be made suddenly, experience and gut feeling is sometimes all you can go with." -Joseph Primm

Here I was coming up I-278 towards the interchange with I-87 near the borough of Manhattan in New York City. If I successfully navigated this during rush hour, I would successfully make it out to my hotel in Teterboro, NJ. I wasn't worried because getting lost doesn't phase me too much, just the idea of not figuring it out would have bothered me.

So negotiating the various lanes, lack of signs and a 'general' map of the route, instinct had to work. I had prepared or so I thought, the maps looked rather easy but sometimes reality is a bit more harsh. Life tends to be that way most times as well.

We plan and plan, writing down on paper those goals in perfect order. If we do this first, exit to the right here and cross over the bridge to the next step; then everything will work out perfectly. But than you come to the interchange of I-87 and I-95, looking for exit 7S. Check out the map and then see what the reality is.

You and I both have had dreams for what we wanted our lives to be. Each of us held onto those visions and were working slowly towards them. Life than got in the way, the reality of circumstance and failed decisions.

What do you do when that happens and life needs you to be in the left lane when in fact your trapped in the right hand lane? What do you do when all of a sudden there are multiple exit choices and no proper signs to guide you? What happens if the GPS on your life conks out and a decision has to be made now?

You trust in yourself and simply make a decision. You go with that and adjust from it. The traffic in my life prevented me from going the original direction I wanted to. I couldn't get over into that left lane and my life took a vastly different course. So I took the road handed to me, adjusted my plans and moved on.

The destination may look different, but it is one filled with happiness and contentment. I made a decision not to force myself back into the left lane. My experience and gut feeling told me to go ahead and stay in the lane and take that course. It took me to where I needed to be, it got me across the George Washington Bridge and my best life.

You can achieve your best life, a happy life even when faced with making a quick decision. Let your instincts guide you when needed, prepare at other times, but take the road and let it lead you to your destination in life.

Look Up

"Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling." -Unknown

During a business trip to Teterboro, New Jersey one recent day, the location of my hotel was near the local airport. This airport is not a large commercial airport but does serve a lot of private jets and planes. It seemed as though every time I walked to the parking lot to get in the car or returned from somewhere, a plane was overhead.

I thought to myself that there seemed to be an awful lot of people heading one place or another. It also had me looking up quite a bit. And when you are looking up, you are seeing the brilliant sun and and an endless blue sky. If I held my head down and looked to the ground, all that I could see was the dirty asphalt.

What occurred to me is that by looking to the ground, nothing can inspire us. But if we look upward, possibility exists, soaring above us, to be reached only if we look up and see that it is there. Reaching for it becomes the next hurdle, but until we look up we will never know of that possibility.

So look up, see what exists and then reach for it. An old saying that the 'sky is full of possibility' really is true.

Shot Heard Round

"They certainly give very strange names to diseases." -Plato

Today I choose to whine just a little bit. I'm not looking for sympathy or even empathy for that matter. I just want to tell you about a little issue with my shoulder.

I have developed a bone spur in my left shoulder along with some amount of arthritis in it. The pain is not so bad these days with the treatments but it still aches. A couple of days ago, my doctor injected the shoulder joint with cortisone which seems to be having a pleasing effect.

What I found funny was that the pain exists on the front of the shoulder. The injection was given in the rear of the shoulder. The doctor explained that it gets to the same place, but that it bypasses where most of the nerves are. That means less pain when the shot is being given.

My theory is that the shot is done from the back so that I can't see the needle going in. I doubt that I would be squeamish about it, but then again maybe I would have screamed at the sight. Either way, the shot seems to have done what it is supposed to.

If you ask me how I am doing, I will likely say much better and thank you for asking me. What you also may hear me say is that my medical issues are nothing compared to others. I feel blessed with the health my wife and I have. There are so many people out there with greater pain and worries.

We have friends that are under going many different medical treatments. One just underwent back surgery, another suffers debilitating arthritis and a close friend is undergoing radiation and chemo treatments for brain cancer. Is my little shoulder problem a big thing? No, not in the grand scheme of things.

What I feel many of us need to do is look at our issues in the bigger context of life. Is the need to worry over Kim Kardashian divorcing Kris Humphries more important than going to visit a friend in real need. Maybe we should put our little issues aside and decide that other people are in need. The needs of those people outweigh the pettiness that we sometimes dwell in.

All of us want attention from time to time, but you'll receive more in return by reaching out a hand in kindness to others. Take a meal to a family that is struggling or go visit a friend that is pushing through a medical issue. You could even take a friend out for coffee that has been caring for another person.

There is so much you can do that it will be like a shot heard round the world. People will know of your kindness, people will start repeating your kindness, and pretty soon your own world will be filled with kindness.

My shoulder, it is no big deal. I have way bigger things in my life to attend to.

New Books, New Stories

"Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit." -Khalil Gibran

As the days pass, I will begin to build up to the announcement of my new book. The manuscript is with the publisher and potentially a few edits and changes to make, are all that stand between now and publication. This book marks a slight shift from the past couple of books, CHANGED LIVES and LIVE THE JOURNEY.

In my new book called LOVE IS, the intent is to take you through a series of stories that will give you new perspective on what love is. There is a wide variety of good and many not so good definitions of what love is on display and talked about these days. This book should bring it all back to an easy and healthy way to know and understand what love really is.

Yes, I still use my own life experiences to illustrate what love does in life, the lessons learned, and the power of love in our lives. I also bring it around to one of the greatest love stories ever told. You will recognize it and in my book I attempt to break down the meaning of each sentence for you.

The name of that love story will have to wait, but if you think about it, you'll know which one I'm talking about. If not, once the book is out, you can read and find out what a huge impact love, the right kind of love, can have on your life.

Stay inspired my friends and if you are looking for a great read today, check out @DavidSpell new book Street Cop II (Reloaded). Read stories from a 30+ year career to find out what serving and protecting really means.

Can I Live forever

"I intend to live forever. So far, so good." -Steven Wright

I have wondered from time to time, what it would be like to live forever. Or live for at least one-seventy five years as Abraham, from Bible stories did. Maybe two-hundred or more years would be sufficient to see tremendous change. And then again, maybe only ninety years will be enough.

My grandmother lived to be 93 years-old and I remember how she was enthralled by the changes she had seen. She was born at a time when telephone service was in its early infancy. She died when the first cell phones were coming out. Moving pictures went from silent films to the big screen and back down to the small screen with VCR tapes. Even the cameras used to record them could be held (on your shoulder) and instantly seen. Not to mention television sets, cars, the moon, and so many things.

What I believe would be hard if living longer would be the loss of family, friends and familiarity with every day life. Of course good health would be essential and money. Heck, who is going to hire a one-hundred twenty year old man even if I do have my wits about me. Life would be a gradual adaptation to seeing so much change.

Don't get me wrong, I will live as long as God gives me to live. I am happy for each day and each moment with my wife, kids, grand kids, and friends. The experience of life is a joy to behold and whether it is sixty years or six-hundred, I will be thankful for each of them.

The important part of living forever though is living the years you are given such that the memory of you lives on. If the life I live is a good one, as good as one can strive for, then you do live on forever in the minds and hearts of those that knew you.

My own mother lived to be almost seventy-eight years of age until Pancreatic Cancer left its mark on us. We firmly believed that she would live into her nineties and beyond. She was that rock-solid to us and invincible. She lived though for others, for her children, for her family. And she enjoyed life even with all of the heart-break and pain that comes with simply living.

The interesting part is that she continues to live on inside each of us. She lives in the stories we tell our children and grand-children. She will live on in the stories that they tell the generations. So in a way, she is living forever and so far, so good.

He Is My Son

"It takes a long time to grow young." -Pablo Picasso

I remember a boy sitting in a laundry basket, smiling from ear to ear.
He may have been one year old or two, but this I know, he is my son.

He was proud of his trick, having gotten into the basket to surprise Dad.
So proud of him and everything since, for he is my son.

Years flow by like cool mountain streams, winter's store of snow racing towards the sea.
Each drink of water quenches the soul, for he is my son.

As time runs on and age consumes, rocks will wear and new flowers bloom.
But forever it remains, for he is my son.

Happy Birthday my son.

Temptation

"Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call to duty." -Earl Wilson

I guess it happens to all of us. We could be walking down the street and when we turn the corner, we find temptation standing right there in front of us. It is seductive and does very well at playing to the inner most parts of us.

Recently it happened to me and did so in such a quiet and sneaky way that I am still surprised. You see I am one of those people that like cars but not enough to pay the large sums of money required for a new one. So I tend to buy a car that is a couple of years old and drive it for quite some time.

I took our 2004 Chrysler Concorde in for some new tires, which turned into a stripped lug nut bolt. From there I went to the dealership for a new lug nut and bolt replacement. Of course the brakes were getting a bit thin so I decided to have the front brakes replaced and yes, the front rotors as well. It was all going well until they brought the car around front and the brake pedal sunk to floor and they needed to use the emergency brake to stop the car.

Back in the service bay it went to find that the rear seal of the master cylinder had broken. The ensuing explanation of what and how that could have happened took place. My only reaction was just how much and lets get it fixed. I've gotten to a point in life where I can't change what just happened, I just need to deal with it and move forward.

The dealership offered a free rental car and thus the temptation began ever so quietly. When I had walked in originally for repairs, the service manager and I spoke about the new 2012 Chrysler 300 vehicle. For me, it piqued my interest and we had a nice discussion about them. Now I found myself riding to the car rental facility in a courtesy vehicle, the drive and I also talking again about the 2012 Chrysler 300.

There was paperwork and a bit of a wait and it shouldn't surprise you, they provided me with a 2012 Chrysler 300 of course. I slipped in and grasped the steering wheel, adjusting the seat perfectly to accomodate my frame. The satellite radio kicked out a concert hall sound as I placed the transmission into reverse. The large screen lit up with a view of the ground behind, no need to turn my head as everything behind me was perfectly clear.

Onto the highway I turned and the car's Hemi V-8 engine lifted and pulled me forward down the road with the greatest of ease. As I had expected, this car was all that I had expected. The seduction of a new car was taking hold of me. Temptation had me looking at financing options. The three sirens were clearly tempting my spirit.

Yet I found myself and looked beyond the temptation of a new car. The car payments, the insurance costs, worrying about this and that when it comes to keeping a new car looking new. There are other things higher on my wife's and my priority list. This car was trying to push its way to the top and nearly made it there.

We are all tempted by the slick marketing advertisements and the material want for new things. The yearning for these items usually starts in our emotions, which can be quite powerful. But you also have to step back from teh temptation, examine the reality of it and the longterm consequences of it. For us, buying a new car wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. It would mean placing other things lower on the list, reprioritizing.

When I stepped back though and looked at what was really important in our lives, the car just didn't match up. The temptation almost worked, but understanding that once the emotional excitement drifted away, the temptation ended up holding no power over me. I ruled the day and made the right choice.

Don't let temptation pull you into the rocks like a crashing wave. Settle back and consider beyond the moment of excitement. Take a clear view of what you want in life and avoid the sirens. You will find life a whole lot better without the aggravation of a hangover from choosing a wrong temptation.

Color Outside The Lines

"We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them." -Albert Einstein

As I write this article, I am a couple of days past having submitted the manuscript for my fourth book. You will hear more about the book as the days progress, but writing it had the usual ups and downs. I am not a very disciplined writer in respect to creating an outline to frame a story. I do get a general idea in three or four parts of how I want the story to flow. But then I simply begin writing, letting words flow from inside like water flowing from a spigot.

Sometimes though, the spigot gets turned off with barely a drip of water. The flow stops and you could definitely call it "writers block." It is a frustrating thing to go through because the harder you try, the more void that occurs. It happens to many people so I know that I am not unique in that sense.

It was interesting recently to find that a sister-in-law of mine, very talented in the arts, was having something kind of similar happening. We were gathered as a family due to the recent passing of my mother-in-law. The siblings and their spouses all sat around eating, drinking wine, and talking about our lives with Mom. So I was surprised to hear my sister-in-law indicate that she had gone dry in her creativity. She was struggling to find the inspiration that would turn the spigot back on.

A brother-in-law offered a very good idea that can push you to creativity as well. The method is to force yourself into a deadline. In example, I had a deadline in order to get my manuscript completed. That can be a very good motivational thing, but a lot of times it doesn't unleash the creativity of the writing. I could tell that deadlines were not what she wanted or needed at this point in her life.

She then told us a story about her mother. One day when she was quite young, Mom was sitting with her at the table, chatting as a mother and daughter do. Mom was coloring in her daughter's coloring book. The story sounded as if they were talking about life in general and as they talked, the coloring Mom was doing was outside the lines.

Now most of us have taken crayons to a coloring book when we were young. We are instructed to stay inside the lines and use the various colors to fill in the picture. But this time Mom was coloring the areas outside the lines. I had to stop and think about what my sister-in-law was saying.

It occurred to me this was an expressive way of saying, "think outside the box." Step back and look at things differently from what conventional wisdom tells us to do. In my regular job, when troubleshooting a technical problem, when all logic fails, I employ this same method. You might call it "whacky" thinking or even "crazy" ideas, but it works. Like a broken record, trying the same thing over and over keeps you in the same spot.

I told my sister-in-law to keep after it, the creativity will come back. Take a piece of paper, just start pushing ink lines across the empty space of white. Crinkle up the paper, unfold and neatly fold it, wet the edges, and maybe end up throwing it away. Just change up what it is you are doing.

My own writers block got solved during the writing of my book by simply writing random words. I began typing cryptic and nonsensical phrases, and then printed it out and drew on it. An example is shown below. Don't ask me how it works but it works for me.

It takes several of these to get it happening again. Sometimes it is other things, but what it takes is thinking outside the box. Trying something different can be the thing that sparks a change. What we need to do though is change it up, don't sit and wait for it to happen. Movement causes change, movement will give you the chance to intersect with opportunity, and movement will keep your life moving forward.

In-Between Bits

"Between you and every goal that you wish to achieve, there is a series of obstacles, and the bigger the goal, the bigger the obstacles. Your decision to be, have and do something out of the ordinary entails facing difficulties and challenges that are out of the ordinary as well. Sometimes your greatest asset is simply your ability to stay with it longer than anyone else." -Brian Tracy

There you stand at the start line, anticipation and excitement building up inside of you. Those around you are murmuring the same thrill of the race to begin. The general tone of the crowd begins to build in crescendo, everyone waiting for the starting gun to go off.

Bang!!

Away everyone takes off and immediately they cross the finish line. That finish line tape breaks as all of the runners shout in joy. The band plays and the crowd cheers in approval.

Think of what it would be like to get rid of all the bits in-between the start and finish line. What if we set a goal in life, started and could finish it right away without having to deal with all of the ups and downs in-between? What if you could snap your fingers and you would be done?

I'm not sure we would really gain all that much. The first couple of times would be pretty cool one could suppose. But we would lose our ability to grow, to learn from all that happens in-between. Pretty soon I'm sure you would become bored with life in general. We are born and than we die; no sense messing about with all of that stuff in-between right?

It is great though that life isn't that way. It is great that we have to live all of the in-between bits. We have to struggle in order to appreciate the success. We have to endure some pain in order to experience the joy. We get to live life and all that happens from start to finish.

While the start of something is exciting and crossing the finish line is exhilarating, the tough part is what happens between the two. We can easily allow discomfort to takeover and allow us to abandon our dreams. You are running the race and someone yells "free ice cream" and we pull off course, distracted from the finish. Well, you get my point.

All of that stuff in-between is the really important part of achieving any goal or dream. Starting is easy and crossing the finish line is easy. Keeping yourself motivated and inspired is the hard part. It will be a roller-coaster ride, painful, joyful, easy, hard, and you name it.

You will finish though, you will break the finish line tape. The band will strike up a song, the crowds will cheer, the trophy will be presented and pictures taken. But before you get there, keep moving forward, keep advancing, keep overcoming anything that stands between your start line and that glorious finish line.

A Glass

"Optimists find joy in small things. They enjoy sunsets, a good conversation with a close friend; and they enjoy life in general. They are more concerned with having many small joys rather than having one huge joy." -Robert M. Sherfield

Not too long ago, I read an article written by Jane Pauley in which she writes how she does tend to be a 'doubter' as opposed to an optimist. She indicates that if she could choose, she would choose to be an optimist. And she really kind of thinks that she is more of a realist as opposed to being a pessimist.

My thought is that a pessimist believes the grass is dry and dead. An optimist believes the grass is always lush and green. The realist simply knows where the fence is that divides the patches of earth. I believe you can be a optimistic realist, which means there can be pessimistic realists as well. So I choose the optimistic side of the fence.

I guess what this gets down to is do you fret over the little obstacles in life? Do you wait and wait, worrying until the time is perfect to get past these obstacles? After all is said and done, most experts agree that once you have gathered information and mulled it over for some amount of time, just do something.

So here I am telling you to just do something, but it takes a positive attitude to give you that courage. The optimist is more likely to jump in the boat, oars in hand and try. A pessimist is unlikely to give it the old 'trial and error' college try.

In order to try and think more positively, here are three tips:

1. Give Thanks: Terry Paulson, Ph.D., author of The Optimism Advantage: 50 Simple Truths to Transform Your Attitudes and Actions into Results, says to tell others what you're grateful for. When you share positively, the whole energy of your attitude changes.

2. Keep Moving: Moods can spiral downward, therefore you need to stay physically and mentally active according to Margie Warrell, author of Find Your Courage: 12 Acts for Becoming Fearless at Work and in Life.

3. Focus Forward: If you set lofty goals, they improve your outlook in life. Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph.D., and author of Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-being. He recommends to live in the future with short- and long-term goals to keep yourself positive.

The glass can be whatever you want it to be. Just keep filling it each day with good things, good thoughts and a good life; your best life.

Big Idea

"Believe in something larger than yourself... get involved in the big ideas of your time." -Barbara Bush

The thought of coming up with one big idea is daunting to most people. We sit and think and think some more about one big idea. The sitting around thinking all day never accomplishes anything. All we end up doing is just thinking.

There are those of course that have a big idea every day. They rush out and each big idea fails. The problem is that those big ideas are self centered. How to make the next big dollar, millions mind you. But when you look only selfishly at the next big idea, failure will normally occur.

When you look to connect yourself with a big idea that helps others it changes the game. Even your own idea, outwardly, unselfishly, sacrificial will grow into a big idea. Your big idea will impact and change peoples lives without even realizing it is going to happen.

Where is your big idea going to go?

A Day Filled With Happiness

"Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens." -Khalil Gibran

You have been given a wonderful opportunity. You have been given a life to live. You have been given the greatest gift and it is your life to live. I always wonder why people do not see the wonder in it and choose to live a negative and unhappy life.

Is not life a vanishing resource to us, from the moment we are born the years, days and minutes are numbered? I believe we should be happy in living those moments we call our life.

Reverse the unhappiness, let go of what burdens you and live your life to a full extent.

Shirley Neering Schmidt Creager

This past weekend my wife's mother Shirley passed away. She was born to Royal and Doris Luce a long time ago. She married Paul Schmidt and together they had eight beautiful and wonderful children; each still spread the joy that was Shirley, everywhere they go. Later in life she re-married and spent many years in the desert plains of Mesa, Arizona. It was a life with so many stories.

Shirley's life and story was filled with all of the pain and joy that comes with living this grand life. We each get to make what we want and can of that life. Shirley did just that.

You know, when a life ends, the length of that life is always far too short for those remaining. We each want one more day, an hour or even a few more seconds. But we do not get to chose the time or the place, we don't get to hold our loved ones in our arms forever.

What we do get to keep and hold onto are the memories and love for those that have passed before us. It is that love which will never cease, and means our loved ones will never end; love is eternal.

The following poem was written by Mary Frye in 1932. The inspiration came from a young Jewish woman who was living with Mary and her husband. This woman's mother was ill and living in Germany at the time. Due to the anti-Semitic unrest, her mother begged of her not to come back to Germany; that she would be okay.

Soon this young woman's mother died and she was heart-broken that she never had the chance to “stand by her mother’s grave and shed a tear”. She cried in pain at not being able to be with her mother and say goodbye.

Mary Frye then wrote the following poem.

Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there;
I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft starlight at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there;
I did not die.

In our hearts and memories, Shirley will always be here with us. Even though we never had a chance to say goodbye, we know you are still here with us. And until we get to meet again, the stars will shine and the sun will warm our days. We will know that you are peacefully smiling upon each and everyone of us.

Someone Is Thinking of You

“Perhaps they are not stars, but rather openings in heaven where the love of our lost ones pours through and shines down upon us to let us know they are happy.”

Our mother, Rose Marie (Gale) Primm passed away on October 14, 2008. She died from the effects of Pancreatic Cancer. It is a day that our family carries in our hearts because Mom gave us so much during her life and also in those final days.

One thing she said that resonates with me to this day is, "Prayer was here for us before we knew what prayer was for." To me it means that God is looking out for us even if we are unaware of it.

I add my mother to that list of people up above. She is looking out for each of us even now from a greater place. She is doing so even when we don't realize that she is. And for that I thank you Mom.

Love you and miss you.

Queen Victoria and Prince Albert

"It is difficult to know at what moment love begins; it is less difficult to know that it has begun." -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

As I draw closer to finishing the manuscript for my new book, there are stories I wish to tell. Stories that speak of love and how it manifests itself in our history and in our everyday lives.

Today is a love story about English royalty and the death of a royal. This is not the story of Princess Diana, however tragic that was. This is the story of a queen who mourned her husband's death for 40 years.

Queen Victoria was a lively, cheerful girl, fond of drawing and painting. She ascended to the throne of England in 1837 after the death of her uncle, King William IV. It was in 1840 that she married her first cousin, Prince Albert of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha. While at first Prince Albert was unpopular in some circles because he was German, he came to be admired for his honesty, diligence, and his devotion to his family. The couple had nine children and Victoria loved her husband deeply. She relied on his advice in matters of state, especially in diplomacy.

Sad as it may be, Albert's death came suddenly; in November of 1861 he contracted typhoid fever. He was sick in bed for several weeks and fell silent from the disease on December 14. Albert was only forty-two years old and Victoria was devastated.

She wrote to one of her daughters, "How I, who leant on him for all and everything—without whom I did nothing, moved not a finger, arranged not a print or photograph, didn't put on a gown or bonnet if he didn't approve it shall go on, to live, to move, to help myself in difficult moments?"

For three years, Queen Victoria did not appear in public. While she held herself in seclusion, this generated quite a bit of criticism and several attempts were made on her life during this period. It took the influence of Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli to persuade Queen Victoria to resume public life, by opening Parliament in 1866.

Queen Victoria never stopped mourning her beloved Prince Albert. She always wore the color black until her death in 1901, a sum of forty years. It was during her reign, which was the longest in English history that Britain became a world power on which it is said "the sun never set."

The sun never set on her love for Albert, an example of undying love. A love that lived on beyond the physical and beyond their time together. Love can be that lasting.

Your Wake Up Call

"A man is what he thinks about all day long." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Every day that you wake from sleep, you have a choice to make regarding your attitude. If you choose to think in a negative fashion, it will be a negative day you will have. If you choose to believe nothing will come to fruition in your life, than nothing will. What you believe in yourself will dictate what will happen.

Why not choose to believe in better things for your life. Why not believe that the day can be good. Why not believe in those around you. Why not believe in yourself.

Choose today that things will be good.

Victory Achieved

“Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later, win a little more.” -Louis L'Amour

There are hundreds of small victories won each and every day. All you have to do is look for them and accept them for what they are; victory in your life.

We spend way too much energy and effort on acknowledging our failures. There is cause analysis done and much angst over that which we fail to achieve. To look at and understand what we may have done wrong is okay. To review and see what it was that went wrong is just fine. You then need to move on from it.

But lots of times we dwell on it, which gives it power over us. It causes us to lose confidence in little bits and pieces. So why not give as much time and acknowledgement to all of the little victories. With each and every one, we build a bigger mountain to stand upon. We deserve those victories. We deserve to acknowledge and accept those victories in our life.

So get on with letting go of the failures, any and all. Get on with adding up your victories in life, large or small. One victory after another will lead to achieving those goals in life.

Red Light, Green Light

"It is in the moments of our decisions, that our destiny is shaped." -Anthony Robbins

I was driving to work this morning after having breakfast with my lovely wife Laura. We were discussing a possible change in our lives to accomodate something that is dear to our hearts. But it is a decision that impacts not just us, but our family and friends as well. That means we are giving it careful thought before moving forward.

During the short drive from breakfast to work, early as it is I came up to the stop light at an intersection. As I sat there in the fading darkness of night, the green of the traffic light for cross traffic jumped out at me. But so did the glowing red of the stop light in front of me. Each light seemed to be accomplishing the same thing.

The thought struck me that these traffic lights were not just there to safely guide me through. The red and green were also there to slow me down in my busy and hectic life. I'm sure you can relate to being busy and I'm not here to say mine is any busier than yours. While it may seem that the stop lights are getting in your way, they are actually slowing you down.

They give you time to catch up with yourself and consider what is going on. It is similar to slowing down and making thoughtful choices about how you are going to proceed. Those decisions we make in life are sometimes 'drop of the hat', quick and without much thought. We move on and correct maybe a wrong decision later. If only we would stop for a moment or two first, we may save ourselves further down the road.

What it might save is getting pulled over further down the street for having run a 'yellowish-red' light at the intersection. It may have saved a life from running a red-light and not making it.

But some will ask, how long should I stop and think about my decision? My answer is "how long is a piece of rope?" I can not answer that for you because it depends upon you and your willingness to feel comfortable with the decision. For that matter, how long do you sit at a red light?

Depending upon whom you ask, how long it takes is very much like this chart.

Cheezburger.com

So take care and watch out for those red lights cautioning us to slow down. Take the time to make your decisions wisely and then get ready. The light is going to turn green on your life.

Tear from an Apple

"Visionary people face the same problems everyone else faces; but rather than get paralyzed by their problems, visionaries immediately commit themselves to finding a solution." -Bill Hybels

Steve Jobs has passed away at the age of 56 years old. As a co-founder of the computer company Apple, the world experienced the visions of a man unfold and transform our lives. It is not often that we get to experience such a person in our lifetimes.

There will be plenty written about Steve Jobs, the business man, the innovator and the accomplishments. The changes that his company brought into this world will impact how we communicate, conduct and relate to each other for years to come.

I was not alive at the time to watch when people such as Thomas Edison, Henry Ford and others brought their visions into our world. I only get to live with the results of those visions, dreams and accomplishments. They gave us the types of changes that completely altered and improved the world around us.

The computer business is no different as it has transformed our everyday lives. Steve Job's vision and his company's products and innovations have accomplished the same thing. For a long time to come, what he accomplished will also transform our everyday lives. We will not soon forget the man.

But I also realize there is a family and friends behind this man who lived by the name Steve Jobs. To those people I send deepest sympathies. To lose a loved one is a heart breaking and life changing event as well. It is a loss that goes beyond words.

Steve's vision will live on in his products. His memories will live on in the hearts of his family, and his friends.

Teamwork and Me

"Teamwork is the ability to work together toward a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishments toward organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people to attain uncommon results." -Andrew Carnegie

It might be that you work by yourself, sitting at your desk filling out reports, researching, or making projections. Maybe you are on the factory floor installing windshields, or in a day care tending to infants. It could be a myriad of things you do each day. But much of what we accomplish is done with teamwork present visibly and many times invisibly.

Take the story of Charlie Plumb, a navy jet pilot in Vietnam. He had seventy-four successful combat missions, but on his 75th mission, with only five days before he was to return home, Plumb was shot down.

Captain Charlie Plumb parachuted into enemy territory, was captured and spent six years in prison. He survived imprisonment and now lectures on the lessons he learned from his experiences.

After his return from Vietnam, Charlie and his wife were sitting in a restaurant when a man approached them, and said, "Are you Plumb the navy pilot?"

"Yes, how did you know?" asked Plumb.

"I packed your parachute," the man replied.

Plumb was amazed and very grateful to the man, "If the chute you packed hadn't worked I wouldn't be here today."

Charlie Plumb refers to this story in many of his lectures. He realized that there were anonymous sailors who packed the parachutes and held the pilots' lives in their hands, and yet the pilots never gave these sailors a second thought; never even said hello, let alone said thanks.

As Captain Plumb asks his audiences, "Who packs your parachutes?..... Who helps you through your life?.... Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually?....... Think about who helps you; recognize them and say thanks."

There is teamwork involved in many parts of our lives. You know they are out there and you can find them. Look around your community to find them. Look around your workplace to see whom they are. Look around your home and church to see whom those people are that are on your team.

You will hear the phrase that there is no 'I' in 'TEAM' to make their point. I prefer to say that there is 'ME' wrapped up in the word 'TEAM' which means we only succeed because of those around us. And those around us succeed because you are part of their lives, their team. We are each an integral part of not only our success but of those around us, the team.

The people around you that have entered into your life. Your family, your friends and co-workers. Your team exists of many, not one. Realize that you are part of a bigger team than just one. See how much further your life and the lives of the team will achieve once we acknowledge and embrace the idea.

Stay inspired my friend.

My Aching Attitude

"Grow old with me! The best is yet to be." -Robert Browning

So there I was sitting in the Orthopedic doctor's office, waiting to hear the news. This particular doctor had once been a team physician for the New York Mets baseball team. There was confidence in my mind but nervous about what the results might be.

My left shoulder had been having increasing pain over the course of two to three months. Normally I would not think much of it but worse and worse it became. The pain becomes nearly unbearable when trying to sleep at night should I happen to roll over onto it. Think of sleeping quite nicely and then having someone drive a pointed stick into the area of your collarbone. Ouch!

My doctor said that normally that is the point at which people finally come in. The point in which sleep is disrupted. Go figure!

I sat in the examining room and thought of all those sports injuries it could have been. While I am not an athlete, oh well it could be. Anyway, a tear, a cracked bone, some abnormality that defies logic? I can see the sports headlines now, "Primm out with Rotator Cuff - Blog put on Hold." What would all my fans do?

The doctor came into the room and ran me through a few more mobility tests, looked at pictures of my shoulder and always in the inevitable "hmmm" sound. "Give it to me straight Doc, I can take it. Am I out for the season?"

His diagnosis? Normal, common everyday AC Joint Arthritis. As a person becomes older and uses the shoulder, normal wear and tear, or degeneration, of the cartilage takes place in the joint. Common in middle age people. "Wait a minute, did you say as people become older?" I asked.

That is correct, I am just like you and millions of other folks that have this thing called "aging." For some reason I got to thinking it probably has to do with that AARP membership card I sent in earlier this year. But no getting around it, I am simply growing older like everyone else.

I really can not complain though. My body might be trying to show signs but my mind is fresh and not nearly as old. Some may call that immaturity, but I think of it as never getting too old not to enjoy the life I have. There are people that have and are going through much more difficult physical challenges, (cancer, major injuries). So I thank my God for the good health that I do have.

While we each may be getting older, complaining about it will not make it go away. We need to enjoy our lives to their fullest possible given our circumstances. Some are better than others but it isn't a comparison. It is about you and what you feel about your life. You dictate how happy your life is by choosing to be happy.

There are those that will say, "Sure, that's easy for you to say." And they are partially correct in that assessment. I don't have a debilitating disease nor am I fighting through anything worse than a sore shoulder. But what I am doing is working on my attitude. Training myself to change any negative thinking into positive thinking.

The time may come when my aging body gives me a bigger surprise. But if I have exercised my brain, my thoughts, properly than I will be better prepared to deal with the physical changes. In many ways there are only two choices we have, "Get busy living, or get busy dying" (The Shawshank Redemption - Andy Dufresne).

Stay inspired my friends.

Charting Our Attitude

Here we are at the end of the week. I have had good success in working on my manuscript and sharing one last older post with you. Here from May 12, 2006 is "Charting Your Attitude".

Billy Graham once said, "we do not understand the intricate pattern of the stars in their courses, but we know that He who created them does and that just as surely as He guides them, He is charting a safe course for us." The quote is one mans vision of how we can face an uncertain future. It is a tough thing to go through when it is yourself facing bad times.

Those low spots in your life can always be countered by thinking of those high spots in life. The next thing you can do is one small positive thing. Smile at someone you pass on the street, open a door for another or maybe help out another individual in some small way. The things you do in a positive way will build upon itself. And keeping your attitude strong in spite of down times is of utmost importance.

As you work your way through this, listen to others and know that many are their to help you through these times. Surround yourself with these people not to pour your problems on but to help build yourself up. Many of us have been through the valley and know of your pain. A safe course is being charted for you, read the signs and follow it to a better life.

Sweeping The Street

As we continue sharing some older posts, last weekend my wife and I fixed up the area around our mail box. With the dirt and mess, we ended up having to sweep the street. It reminded me of a favorite of mine by the Rev. Martin Luther King, Jr.

If a man is called to be a street sweeper
He should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted
Or Beethoven composed music
Or Shakespeare wrote poetry

He should sweep streets so well
That all the hosts of heaven and earth
Will pause to say
Here lived a great street sweeper
Who did his job well

~Martin Luther King, Jr~

This is one of my favorite quotes that I share with you today. You can make a difference every day simply by doing what you do, to the best ability that you can.

Where You Going

This week, still sharing some older posts. In keeping with OLDER posts and that it just so happens to be my brother Jim's birthday today, here is one from September 28, 2010 titled "Light of Life".

Happy Birthday Jim!

“And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.” ~Abraham Lincoln

All of life is actually pretty grand when you think about it. An amazing biological wonder is what happens from conception to death. Sometimes it is very difficult to comprehend the immensity of what must happen for life to exist.

And then I turn to my beliefs and know that anything is possible. The big bang theory, Adam and Eve, evolution, and how they get the peanut butter inside the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup; life gives us enormous possibility. Darkness can turn into light with the blink of an eye. That light becomes you and shines from within you as well.

So as we celebrate my brother Jim's birthday today, think about how amazing your own life is. Then consider all of the possibility life has to offer you. Enjoy life, live life to your greatest potential and allow the light of your life to shine.

Happy Birthday Jim.

Rolling It Up The Hill

This week we are sharing some older posts that received attention by many of my readers. Here is one from July 28, 2010 titled "Journey Onward".

"The will to persevere is often the difference between failure and success." ~David Sarnoff

In Greek mythology Sisyphus was a king whom was punished by being made to roll a huge rock up a hill, only to watch it roll back down. He repeats this throughout eternity.

The shear will to keep performing this task has many different meanings but maybe it is in the struggle itself towards greatness that is enough to fill your heart. In other words, maybe it is the journey that should be enjoyed.

We persevere throughout our life to reach a goal, dream or final destination in life. What we fail to do many times is to enjoy that wide spectrum of activity between starting and achieving. It can be in the doing of life that provides us with the most enlightenment and enjoyment.

The achievement itself is wonderful but many times it simply becomes another step to something even greater. The journey continues beyond the achievement and it is perseverance that will keep us moving forward.

Enjoy your journey and persevere throughout the process which will be difficult at times. Achievement will only be temporary, the real reward is in the journey itself.

Your Patience Appreciated

So enjoy some older posts, like this one from November 16, 2010 titled "Waiting for a Tow Truck".

"We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other's happiness, not by each other's misery." ~Charlie Chaplin

The other day I was sitting in a restaurant eating dinner with my wife. We were dining on the patio area with big thick glass walls dividing us from the plaza which stretched some distance to the street. The time was rush hour near a particularly busy area of Los Angeles, which sounds odd because I feel every area in Los Angeles is quite busy with traffic.

As the cars filled the lanes to go straight or to turn left, each was trying to simply get home from a long day at work no doubt. Then as circumstance always seems to happen, a car broke down in the turn lane. A ruin to the driver's day and quickly becoming the same to drivers behind him.

With so much traffic on the street, cars quickly piled up behind him wanting to turn left. He was several car lengths from the light, so as those in front would clear, those behind him would vent frustration by honking their horn. Some would find a clear opportunity and move out into oncoming lanes to get around, others would try to squeeze back to the right to get around. But no matter what happened, no one was getting out to help this man.

You could hear the shouts of some, the horns of others and the driving habits of those getting around that the source of their problems for the day were this one man.  Yet twice we saw people stop to offer help. One young lady going so far as to put herself in a bit of a dangerous position with the amount and speed of oncoming traffic.

Yet from what we could tell at a distance is that the man waved off help as he had apparently called for a tow truck. Waiting and waiting was going to be his penance for having car trouble, at rush hour and inconviencing so many other people.  The horns, the gestures and the wait were his to endure.

The tow truck did arrive within the hour and pulled him to safety, freeing up traffic to go about its busy day. And what became of the man we will never know. But it likely ended as you might expect; a tow bill, a car repair bill, late getting home, tired and exhausted.

What of those other people that mocked and ridiculed him with the gestures and honks of displeasure? Did their day really improve by taking it out on this one lone driver? Was this broken down vehicle a planned event to be the reason for a bad day? Did these people acutally end up feeling better? It is unlikely that they did for the broken down vehicle was only a distraction.

What of the few people that did offer to stop and help? I'm betting that their day actually improved. I'm betting that it eased some of the burden in their day. Even those that didn't stop but were mindful and empathetic to the situation; they likely had an easing of their day.

The idea of helping others, in any shape or form is ingrained in our human nature. Some of us repress it as a horrible thing to have. Yet others embrace it and understand the power of helping others. Another person's misfortune is not our gain, but an opportunity to lift yourself while lifting another person. It makes you a better person, it reflects a better side of who you are and other people notice.

Would I be inclined to one day meet one of the irate people that flashed a demeaning gesture? Or would I rather meet the person that stopped to offer help to another person in need?

Think about how you would react in your busy day. Not only stuck in traffic, but in the grocery line, at the bank or even with your children brushing their teeth before bed. Patience, understanding and kindness will take us much further towards a successful life then the alternative.