Judging Book Covers

“Don't judge a man by his opinions, but what his opinions have made of him.” ―Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

I am sure many of you remember the stories that have been told over and over again. It was also very hard to miss all of the videos and clips on the various news programs. You may have even watched all of it unfold on television as everyone collectively held their breath awaiting the first notes to fill the microphone.

I am speaking of the night that Susan Boyle walked onto the stage of the British television show Britain's Got Talent. It was April 11, 2009 when she shocked many people by beautifully singing "I Dreamed a Dream" from Les Misérables. She went on to take second place to a dance troupe called Diversity.

Did nearly everyone of us judge the book cover at first?

Intellectually we each know we should not judge another simply by the way they look. We have been told over and over again "not to judge a book by its cover." But researchers have found that outside appearance does matter in people's judgments on all manner of issues. As the lead researcher, Chia-Jung Tsay (both highly honored musician and a psychologist at University College, London) indicated, "There is something about visual information that is better able to convey cues such as passion or involvement or creativity. These elements are very much a part of high-quality performance."

So our opinions, our judgments are shaped by what we see. While we know that judging someone simply by appearance is not the complete story, the folks that advertise and try to sell stuff to us know we do anyway. Even economists and political psychologists have found that voters can predict the winners of elections when they watch videos of the candidates, with the sound off. If you believe our politicians are shallow, chances are we voted them into office more on appearance then by substance.

Is all of this bad?

No, not really. We are human and we have been endowed with many senses, which we use to make many decisions in life. My belief is in the biology of our make up, the fight or flight decisions we sometimes have to make happen subconsciously. Visual judgment is a nearly instantaneous piece of information that is used in the raw makeup of who we are as humans.

Think of yourself walking down a partially dark street, no one else around and someone walking towards you. Your first instinct is to judge the appearance and manner in which that person is walking towards you. The dust cover of that person is being judged at that very moment. All of this is happening in response to you trying to assess the situation. It is quick and as the person approaches, your intellect starts to process more information such as the person is whistling or maybe talking on the phone.

Does that mean we should have seen Susan Boyle come on stage and ran in fright? Of course not, but our biology is still there, just under the covers and holds a strong place in how we respond. Our intellect is slower and processes many more sources of information. We do this hundreds of times a day whether we realize it or not.

Quick visual judgment is going to happen.

Just try to understand that it goes on and if you use your visual information along with all of the information to be collected, you will have greater control over your own reactions. You will be better equipped to understand when marketers, politicians and a host of other stimuli are trying to manipulate your responses. It will allow you to make better decisions in your life.

Dream the dream and always know the cover of a book will never tell the entire story.



Stay inspired my friends.

Possible Possibility

"If you stay in what was, you will never get to what is." -Kay Weeks

Are you afraid of change in your life? Does the idea of altering the patterns of your life send anxiety flowing through your veins?

But what if you want to get from point A to point B in your life?

It will take change and there is really no getting around that. In fact, life is always in a state of change. The clock is marking the changing of time. The earth is spinning and tilting to change the seasons. The harbinger of age is changing our physical being. Yes, change happens and so we must first get over it, adapt and be willing to allow change to transform us.

The possibilities are endless on what we can do with change in our life. Yet we will never see those possibilities if we stay stuck in the sameness of our lives. You may tell yourself that you have nothing to offer, no talent, or no ability to grab hold of possibility. I say you are wrong and that we each have talents (large or small) that can enable us to do great things. You simply have to be willing to take charge of change and use it to your benefit.

In an article by Dr. Pamela Gerloff,PHD in Human Development, she writes about how we can shift our thinking of possibility by using change. It is referred to as the Possibility Paradigm and talks about how we should view possibility differently. When we do so, it can be used to better our lives and to achieve more.

All of us know of the "Possibility Principle" in which all things are possible. This means absolutely anything, no exceptions, no "everything, but" possibilities, all is possible. The idea of all things possible can be hard to grasp when we are trained from an early age to measure and accept the bounds of what we can and can not do. All of our lives we are told of limits and of what has or has not worked already.

The "Possibility Paradigm" tries to get you to debunk those thoughts.

This is where Dr. Gerloff wants you to consider the "Possibility Paradigm" as a way of helping you achieve what might be considered impossible. There are two parts which are; Part A: If something isn't possible from within your paradigm, change your paradigm. And Part B: Keep changing paradigms until you find one from which that thing is possible. I look to the example of technology and the smart devices we use each and every day.

We have laptops, desktops, phones, computers, and a host of other things that could be very utilitarian in nature. For many years they were, meaning, these devices did the one single job they were intended to do. Then came along one of the more famous innovators that decided to change the paradigm of possibility in how these devices are designed and used.

Steve Jobs decided to design these devices from an artistic and personal use perspective. You could say he changed design of these devices from the outside in versus inside out. You can read more about this in Steve Jobs: The Man Who Thought Different to see why thinking different can make a huge change in your possibility.

If you can shift your view of possibility. If you can change the way you look at possibility. If you allow change to be a positive force in your life, than all things truly are possible. Take your life towards a more positive way of living, make possibility possible in everything that you do.

And stay inspired my friends.

Take Flight

"Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what's to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn't have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves... for growing up.” ~The Wonder Years

I came upon a song called "Flightless Bird" by a group called Iron and Wine. A song of youthful life and growing up. The 'flightless bird' seems to mean he is unsure if he has found his own path. A bird that cannot fly may be seen by some as ironic. Birds are known to fly as they have wings to fly. But if a bird cannot fly, it has not fully realized it's own potential.

Okay, so that was all a little bit too deep for sure.

What is real about growing up is our struggle to prove ourselves on our own. We may experience hurt along the way as we learn to fly. We will make mistakes. We might may end up only reaching a point of just looking out over the edge, afraid to step out and take flight.

It is at this moment where we can make a decision to take that step and fall with no certainty of anyone to catch us. We can choose to forgive ourselves, take risk and connect with others; in other words take flight. Our flight will take place, when we forgive inside. We will then find ourselves among others in flight with a view so spectacular that you wonder why it took so long.

You may think that childhood is lost at this point. Like the young bird that has left the next, flying on its own, building its own life. But it is my belief when we take flight, this is truly when the child inside gets to experience life in all its wonder. The child inside is flightless until we learn to take our wings and use them. When we allow ourselves to forgive inside, when we take our life beyond ourselves and connect with others; only then will we truly take experience the possibility that life has to offer us.

Stay inspired my friends.

Calling for Help

"Responsibility's like a string we can only see the middle of. Both ends are out of sight.." -William McFee

It was March 13, 1964 on a New York street when Kitty Genovese was slowly and brutally stabbed to death. There were by police accounts at least a dozen people in the neighborhood that heard her screams. Over the course of a 90-minute period, her attacker was frightened away at one point, only to return and finally kill her.

Yet not once during that period did any neighbor assist her, or even telephone the police. Later reports from witnesses indicated they thought it was merely a lovers' quarrel. In many respects the responsibility we have for ourselves and for the needs of others can fall short. In this case, Kitty perished and we provide excuses for doing nothing.

Does this story illustrate that we should take the law into our own hands?

No, but what the story does illustrate is that we as individuals need to do "something" when we see, hear or witness a wrong being done. The problem is that too many of us are wrapped up in our smartphone ear plugs, watching the latest video of a cat doing something silly.

In the above incident, it prompted two psychologists, Darly and Latane, to study the conditions under which people may or may not offer assistance to others in an emergency. They staged an experiment around a woman in distress. They found that 70 percent of the people who were alone at the time called out or went to help the woman after they believed she had fallen and was hurt. Interestingly though, when there were other people in the room only 40 percent offered help.

When others are around, apparently it is not my problem.

Too many times we fail to take responsibility for what is happening around us. And I do not mean to say that we have to solve all of the ills that exist in every corner of the world. But we should be responsible humans, watching out for each other and not just ourselves. Life is not a series of personal song playlists and funny cat videos.

Life is an interaction of humans, taking care of each other. We are responsible for our own actions of course, but we are also responsible people. That means all of us have a responsibility to serve, protect and nurture those around us.

But why you might ask?

Only because it might be you calling for help one day.

Stay inspired my friends.

Believe It

"Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy."
-Norman Vincent Peale


Stand strong through your hard times and know you can change your circumstances.

Believe in your visions and dreams when others try to destroy them.

Achieve all that is possible and impossible.


Stay inspired my friends!

Judge Yourself

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” Carl Gustav Jung

If you read that quote carefully, you begin to understand that being judgmental of others says more about ourselves than it does of the person we are judging. I have heard it said that "People provide behavioral models for each other all the time. It is one of the main ways in which we learn things. Every time we see a behavioral model that we don't deem worthy of emulating, such as someone we find irritating, it narrows the selection process for the behaviors that we want to emulate."

What is hard to reconcile many times is that many of the things we find irritating are those things that remind us of our own flaws. Many of the people who seem constantly irritated by most everything are more times than not basically unhappy with themselves. These same people will try to deceive themselves into thinking that its everyone else's fault. All they are attempting to do is block the insight into their own lives that may help them solve their problems.

And that can be very sad to watch someone go through.

All of us have tendencies that make us wish we were or had something else. It could be the physical beauty of a super model, or a great athlete. Whatever that 'thing' is, we will tend to find irritating that which we currently are not. What we need to do instead is find comfort in who we currently are. When we find happiness in who we are (good, bad, whatever) is when we can move on to a more productive life.

Find that person inside of you, the good, the bad and work on who you are first. You can't change others, your judgement of them doesn't change you either. Find out what it is about yourself that you want to change and change it. Easier said then done you are saying, but only you can do it.

Find yourself first, find judgement in who you are.

Stay inspired my friends.

Nicodemus Moves Furniture

"Most of our obstacles would melt away if, instead of cowering before them, we should make up our minds to walk boldly through them." -Orison Swett Marden

My wife and I recently moved into a new home after many years residing in a former house. It was a challenge for us as it would be for anyone. Change of any kind will do that to you. It can create anxiety, doubt and obstacles you may never have thought about. For us, this change was planned and it gave us a reasonable amount of control over that change. Some people are not as fortunate.

Change is sometimes thrust upon us by circumstance.

For this particular move, we hired a moving company famously and simply known as Two Men and a Truck. Two guys and a big truck show up at your house to help you move from one place to another. It was a perfect solution for me as I get a bit older, the lifting, the heat, the up and down stairs takes its toll. Having two younger guys doing the heavy lifting worked out great.

One of the guys was a 23 year-old named Nicodemus; Nico for short. He informed me that yes, he had indeed been named after that Nicodemus. So it had peaked my interest to hear more. I soon learned through the small talk of the humidity, heat and long day that he was married, with a small three year-old daughter and going to school working to earn an Associate's Degree in electronics.

As the work day ended, the paperwork was being drawn up, we sat at the kitchen table talking. I find it soothing that even though we had no food on the table, we were gathered at a table where so much is shared. It is here I learned that he had attended two years at a west Georgia college after he left high school.

What he said next set me back in my chair.

His short college career mimicked my own in many ways and as I listened, I couldn't help from being drawn back in time. You can read about my own similarities in Changed Lives. But simply put, he dropped out of college to support a new family. Now at the young age of twenty-three he has a beautiful three year-old daughter.

Nicodemus talked a little bit about the obstacles he has had to overcome. He spoke of circumstances of his own doing and others that life throws at us. It is his daughter and wife that continue to be his driving force as he puts it. So he works days moving other peoples furniture and nights going to school working on that degree.

There will be more circumstance, more obstacles to overcome I told Nicodemus. I gave him encouragement as I talked of my similar road to where I am today, sitting at that table, talking of success and victory. I told him that the day will come when he is not the one moving the furniture. It will be success that he finds, as all of us can by walking through the obstacles that enter our lives.

He was grateful for the encouragement and as he was leaving I asked him if he knew what the name Nicodemus meant?

In the heat of the mid-afternoon, he turned to me, smiled and said, "Of course I do. It means 'victory of the people'." With that Two Men and a Truck drove away in the light rain.

Will you overcome the obstacles in life or cower to them in fear? I say be fearless and push through to victory, to success.

Stay inspired my friends.

Not the Past

"Nostalgia is like a grammar lesson: you find the present tense, but the past perfect!" -Owens Lee Pomeroy

Not long ago I was involved in a conversation regarding how good things used to be. The point being made that life was simpler, better for all that we had or didn't have. This person waxed on about how great life was. There were many examples being given to illustrate their argument;

- No social media to glue our attention every moment of the day.
- No cell phones that keep us constantly connected to work.
- No economic hardship of harsh unemployment rates and low wages.
- No ... well you get the point.

I kept thinking to myself what kind of nirvana was this person living in? It is very possible that the cycle of economic, social or philosophical change had jaded this person. The past may have seemed better relative to this person's condition in the present day.

In fact, each of us could possibly trace a period in our life when things seemed more clear or comfortable then what exists in our lives today. But for many obvious reasons, we can not live in the past nor can we stop life from changing around us. All we can really do is adapt to the ever changing world and control our own attitude.

When I thought of the points made, I could only think of how far we have come and in many ways learned from the past.

- Yes, social media to expand our connection to others around the world.
- Yes, cell phones that give us wonderful technologies to keep us safer.
- Yes, a workforce that is evolving in the always cyclical nature of business.
- Yes, an opportunity to adapt and change with our ever changing world.

We can lull ourselves into a sense that life was greater, but we must also remember that the past was once our present. We need to learn from that past in order to make our present even greater. Use the experiences lived long ago to make the experiences of today ones that will advance our lives.

Life is like that of an electronic component called a diode. It has low resistance to current flow in one direction, but a high resistance in the opposite direction. Live your life in a forward direction. Live life having learned from the past and not one in which you remain in the past. Embrace the changing world and marvel in all that is possible.

Stay inspired my friends!

On Top

“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.”
-Oprah Winfrey

You just never know how far you will go until you get there. And the only way to get there is by placing yourself around others that will help lift you. That sounds like a no-brainer, but many times we surround ourselves with negative people.

It is those type of people that will only hold us down.

Negativity can be very infectious when it starts to invade your world. Their restricting vines will entwine you until one day you find yourself stuck. There is darkness that surrounds negativity. It restricts your view of what could be a greater life. It simply makes life very difficult to live within the bounds of negativity.

By placing yourself around people that lift and encourage can also be infectious.

Those that live a more upbeat and inspired life want to share that with you. The belief that dreams and visions can be achieved will be nurtured by these type of people. Your life will have a clearer vision of all the possibilities that exist and give you a path towards achieving those possibilities.

You may not end up performing acrobatic moves atop the Empire State Building, but then again you might. You see that's what is great about life, anything is possible.

Stay inspired my friends.

Moving Six Miles

"Don’t worry about being worried. You’re heading out on an adventure and you can always change your mind along the way and try something else." -Tracy Kidder

I found it kind of cool that on the same day our good friends Dave and Annie Spell talk about moving into their new home in Brazil; Laura and I are closing and moving into our new home. For both the Spells and ourselves, there is always a moment or two of anxiety and worry. It happens to all of us and it is usually the first hurdle to overcome when change is being contemplated.

If you follow David Spell's blog, you will have seen the great change he and Annie made. In a life changing move, they are now living in Curitiba, Brazil. For my wife and I, we moved six miles. But the point isn't to compare one to the other because change is a very personal thing to go through. The home we are leaving has been our home for over eighteen years. The familiarity of the the door opening, a creak in the floor or traversing a darkened room will all change.

I even found myself the other day wondering how will I drive to work or home from the new house. Everything is different and strange to the patterns established over so many years. And laying down deep, under the anxiety and worry is this excitement starting to boil up. An excitement that is being held down until the keys are in my hands. An excitement that waits until our old home is sold and I can truly release it.

There are so many times though when we keep ourselves from making a change because we either do not want the anxiety and worry. Other times because we are too afraid of allowing excitement into our lives. But change is how we move ahead in life. It is how we are able to accomplish the impossible. We become self-defeating before we even attempt the change.

To help you, Stan Goldberg, Ph.D. writes in Psychology Today about 10 major principles to help you with change.

- All Behaviors Are Complex
- Change Is Frightening
- Change Must Be Positive
- Being Is Easier Than Becoming
- Slower Is Better
- Know More, Do Better
- Change Requires Structure
- Practice Is Necessary
- New Behaviors Must Be Protected
- Small Successes Are Big

Each of these principles will help you look at yourself in a different manner, allowing change to occur, allowing you to move your life forward. Change happens everyday whether we like it or not. Some changes are big, some changes are little, but change does happen. Allow change to have a positive or better yet, an exciting impact upon your life.

And stay inspired my friends!

Catcher in the Rye

"Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around — nobody big, I mean — except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff — I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I'd do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. I know it's crazy."
-Holden Caulfield (from J.D. Salinger's Catcher in the Rye)

I know there will be many that have a much different opinion than I on this, but I consider Catcher in the Rye one of the great reads of my life. If I slip back into my high school years, there were many teachers being let go or reassigned after having their students read this book. In fact one study showed Catcher in the Rye being the most often censored book in the U.S., second only to John Steinbeck's Of Mice and Men.

My good fortune was to have an English teacher who was not afraid to give us The Catcher in the Rye as a reading assignment. The book will most likely be forever one of Salinger's most memorable books.



What prompts you to question and learn more about the life we live? What inspires you?

1968 Torino GT

"Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future." -Oscar Wilde

Just yesterday I had the pleasure of a momentary jump back into my past. As I was driving back from the office, there in a parking lot was a 1968 Ford Torino GT. It was very much like the one I owned in high school, so stop to look and admire it became a step back in time to 1977. The sleek lines of the car covered the 325-hp/390-cid engine just waiting underneath the hood, longing to roar down the road.

A four-speed manual transmission with a stick shift waiting for the driver to put it into action. Yes, I had a 1968 Ford Torino GT in high school. No it certainly was not as fast as other muscle cars in its era, but it did make for a few fun rides down the flat highways near Cedar Bluffs, Nebraska.

Every now and then it can be good to look backwards into the past. It reminds us of where we were and helps us rediscover how we got to where we are today. Stay inspired my friends and enjoy the ride!

Slow Down

"For fast-acting relief try slowing down." -Lily Tomlin

Okay, I admit that I recently cut my ear while shaving. It means that I will need to find my owners manual and relearn how to shave before I end up really hurting myself. But how in the world does one cut their ear while shaving their face?

It is actually quite easy from what I recently encountered. All that is required is a sharp razor, an early morning hour and just being in too big of a hurry.

Which brings me to the point of this article.

If we are in a hurry to get somewhere, to complete some task or to achieve some goal, chances are we are going to miss seeing all of the little things in life. We miss the fact that we have a razor in our hand swinging around our face. We 'race' down the road in our car, never seeing the small things along the way. We miss the short interactions with other people that can add up to a lot of great things.

In example, I have this issue when traveling on vacation. We jump in the car and my objective is to get from point 'A' to point 'B' as quickly as possible. Many times this results in not getting to see the cool things which lie between those two points. If we slow down and experience life, the result will be that we have fewer missed opportunities; the ones that are there but we fail to see.

Slow down and allow the details to become more clear in your life.

Slow down and realize that the razor in your hand could possibly cut your ear.

Stay inspired my friends!

Step Taken

“To establish true self-esteem we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.” -Denis Waitley

Each of us have small amounts of self-doubt or even large problems with believing in ourselves at various times in our lives. It can be a very debilitating way to live. Your successes or failures in life are mostly dependent upon you as opposed to those things being handed to you.

Even if you are handed success, you can either succeed or fail once given it. Others can have all of the belief and faith in your abilities, but you need to have belief in yourself for success to actually happen.

If you find yourself at a point of just sitting on the edge of your bed, wondering what to do next, may you need to have a talk with yourself. Ask yourself if you are being negative or positive about your life. If negative, a starting point for change has just been found. It isn't easy, it takes time and work to turn your inner ship of negative thinking. But with practice and continued inner talking, you will change those habits.

You will also need to become what is termed a 'chooser and decider'.

You make the choice to have a great day. Don't let someone else be the determination of your attitude. The person that cuts you off in traffic, only you can decide if that circumstance is going to make your day a good one or a bad one. There are many examples just like this. What you have to do is decide to be in charge of your own attitude.

It all begins with these steps we take in life. A small step forward here and a small step forward there; pretty soon you will be on the path to a great life.

NOTE: The picture is of one of my grandchildren. It reminds me that there will always be one first step taken, and that each of us can take this step at any point in our life. Whether 100 minutes or a 100 years old, change happens when we put one foot out to take a step.

Stay inspired my friends in each step you take.

The Open Door

“You can do anything you think you can. This knowledge is literally the gift of the gods, for through it you can solve every human problem. It should make of you an incurable optimist. It is the open door.” Robert Collier

A new week begins filled with work, challenges and recurring things to do. It is also a chance, an opening to new possibilities. Every day opens a new door for you that you can step through.

Take the moment and step through to what is possible.

Stay inspired this week my friends!

A Better Day

"There's nothing wrong or evil about having a bad day. There's everything wrong with making others have to have it... with you." -Neil Cavuto

Some days just seem like the worst anyone could have. You sit around thinking that your problems are worse then anyone else. Then you hear a story that shows you that others may be having it worse.

~~~~~~~~~~

A little guy is sitting at the bar just staring at his drink for half an hour, when this big trouble-making biker steps next to him, grabs his drink, gulps it down in one swig and then turns to the guy with a menacing stare as if to say, 'What'cha gonna do about it?'

The poor little guy starts crying.

'Come on man I was just giving you a hard time,' the biker says. 'I didn't think you'd cry. I can't stand to see a man crying.'

'This is the worst day of my life,' says the little guy between sobs. 'I can't do anything right. I overslept and was late to an important meeting, so my boss fired me.'

'When I went to the parking lot, I found my car was stolen and I don't have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife in bed with the gardener and my dog bit me.'

'So I came to this bar trying to work up the courage to put an end to my life and then you show up and drink the dang poison.'

~~~~~~~~~~

It is a bit of dark humor that illustrates that maybe your day isn't going nearly as bad as someone else. Try to find the good things, little or big, that are actually right in your life. And stay inspired my friends!

Just One Reason

"There are a million reasons you can find to tear someone down. Work to find that 'one' reason to build them up." -Dean Sweetman

When you consider your own life, you have probably found that you do much better in a 'positive' environment. Whether the environment is home, church, school or work; if everyone is always negative, there will likely be little success.

If those areas of our life are going to be great, then we have to have great people around us. You do this by building up others. Think of the people around you that provide encouragement. Remember how good you feel when you are around them. The same can be said when you are near those that would tear you down, and you know how that makes you feel.

You can be someone that encourages others; it not only builds up the other person, but it strengthens your relationship with them. This article is not about shallow flattery or "sucking-up." It means to look for and recognize positive traits and actions in others. The "sucking-up" is as bad as lying to people, they will see through it very quickly.

So what are the benefits of encouraging others?

- Your relationship develops.
People sense your interest in them and are willing to give more of themselves to you.

- Your influence grows.
Who is going to have more influence in the lives of others, the one who tears down or the one who builds up?

- You build stronger loyalty.
When the individual knows they are appreciated, they become loyal, because they know that you care about them.

- You create happy, fulfilled people.
This is not an exercise in “return on investment.” It is right to build up others, without expecting anything in return. Someone out there is looking to tear them down; you be the person committed to building them up.

So work at improving your life and attitude about others. Then take your effort and build up those around you. It will have a great impact on your life.

Stay inspired my friends!

So Move

"To accomplish great things, we must dream as well as act." -Anatole France

For all of the dreaming and planning that we do, movement in action is required to realize those dreams. Each of us know of people that constantly talk of what they want in life but never begin taking actions to achieve it.

Those people may very well be you, always thinking of greater things for your life. Planning and assessing how to get to a new point in your life becomes a daily activity. Yet you never get any closer to the dream.

Why? It is because you make no movement in your life to actually go after those dreams. Without action, a dream remains a dream. With action, a dream can become reality.

Dream of great things, dream of all that you want....then take action.

Stay inspired my friends!

Stuff Happens

"One's life is not as fixed as one believes. Surprises may lie in store for you, the unexpected often tends to happen, sometimes bringing in its train the most delightful change in one's life or circumstances." -Elizabeth Aston

cir·cum·stance (sûrkm-stns)

1. A condition or fact attending an event and having some bearing on it; a determining or modifying factor.
2. A condition or fact that determines or must be considered in the determining of a course of action.
3. The sum of determining factors beyond willful control. Often used in the plural: a victim of circumstance; work that will begin on Monday if circumstances permit.
4. circumstances Financial status or means: "Prior came of a good family, much reduced in circumstances" George Sherburn.
5. Detail accompanying or surrounding an event, as in a narrative or series of events.
6. Formal display; ceremony: the pomp and circumstance of a coronation.
7. A particular incident or occurrence: Your arrival was a fortunate circumstance.

Idioms:
under no circumstances
In no case; never.
under/in the circumstances
Given these conditions; such being the case.

There is a saying that I am sure all have heard before. Without being vulgar in my writing, I will change the wording slightly. The saying is, "Sometimes STUFF happens." I am sure you can fill in the appropriate word within the saying. And it is true, life happens each and every day. There is no seeming rhyme nor reason to any of it. Things will happen at various times in your life, no escaping that fact.

When these things happen, you shouldn't waste your time wondering the why and how. Sure it is good to try and understand what led to the condition. Yet how you conduct yourself, how you respond to these circumstances will determine how well and how quickly you get past it.

There are people I have known that will spend time and time again focusing on the 'why' and very little time on the 'getting past' the circumstance. Repeatedly they bring it up and turn it in circles, looking it over and over. They become so focused on the issue that they are unable to see an outcome or resolution.

So the next time something occurs in your life, know that STUFF happens. It is not an assault upon your life. Stop and examine what you can of it and then move on. Take the experience of having gone through it and let it lead you to something greater. Keep moving, your future awaits.

Stay inspired my friends!

Strategy for Life

"The reason most people never reach their goals is that they don't define them, or ever seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them." -Denis Watley

We dream of things to come and have visions of what we want to accomplish in our life. But these dreams and visions remain just that if no action occurs. The act of taking a step towards them puts us on a journey that will eventually capture our real goal.

Yet how do we go about planning or executing a path towards those goals. In much of my reading, many of the principles I've learned come from business. It comes from those that have achieved in life with very basic steps. In today's article, I want to list these steps. Not in the 'business' vernacular, but in a way that you can adopt them in your own personal life.

For any goal to be met, you need to have a coherent strategy and method of executing those steps. Each of these are crucial in working together for success in achieving a goal or set of goals. Much of what I have read revolves around six steps through which a plan for success in achieving a goal is accomplished.

1. Develop a strategy; it may seem a very basic step, but many people go head long into something without figuring out first how to get there. When considering your vision, think about the following;

- What is the mission or purpose you want of your life?
- How does the goal fulfill that purpose?
- What lies beyond the goal or what do you envision once the goal is achieved?

2. Plan the strategy; now that you have an idea of what the strategy will be, plan how you will implement it. Translate the objectives into specific targets or short term action plans. You can even create a one-page block diagram that gives you a visual idea of where you are. With small and short action plans, accomplishing lots of little steps gives you encouragement and shows progress.

3. Align your life with the strategy; are those around you supportive and willing to come along on this journey. Giving those around you a sense of ownership and benefit will be a supportive network. If you hang around negative people, it only draws you down and hinders your ability to accomplish your goal.

4. Conduct your life with the goal in mind; find ways that will improve and boost your ability to accomplish each of the targets. In ex; if you like to read and the goal is being debt free, then reading sporting magazines all of the time isn't helping you achieve that. Maybe change subscriptions and start reading financial magazines and the like.

5. Monitor and Learn; many strategies to accomplishing something never end up looking exactly as they did when first developed. As you move forward, evaluate what is or is not working to help you achieve the goal. There is no hard fast rule that says you can't change. Change is great when applied to strengthen and improve your strategy.

6. Adapt the strategy; as you monitor and learn from your journey, write down and revise the written strategy. A lot of folks simply adjust and forget to rewrite the strategy. Then when they reach a point of being lost in their journey, they go back to the written strategy for guidance. If it is the old and original one, you will retrace steps that you either don't need to and shouldn't. This can cause you to become disheartened or discouraged. So write down, adapt the written strategy for it is your road map to where you are going.

So performing these steps doesn't require fancy charts and graphs or forms. It only requires commitment from you to take a step. It requires you to change some of what you are doing in life now and being bold to step out of the comfortable.

Once you begin moving and start seeing small accomplishments, the goal becomes much clearer and achievable. Develop a strategy for your life and achieve the seemingly impossible.

Stay inspired my friends!

Attitude Check

"The greatest revolution in our generation is that of human beings, who by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives." -Marilyn Ferguson

Did you check the oil level in your car's engine today by chance? Maybe you created a checklist of grocery items needed for the house last night before going to bed. As you left for work, you may have stopped to check the thermometer or rain gauge to see what the weather is like. Are you really prepared for the day?

And we all do this; stop by the mirror to check what we look like. We make sure our hair is combed straight and that our clothing for the day looks appropriate. Again, are you really prepared?

The one thing we do forget is to check our attitude.

Knowing what type of mood we are in can make all the difference in how our day proceeds. But many times it is the last thing we ever think of doing. We rush off, out the door into a world that is waiting to test your very attitude. Maybe we are not quite prepared?

The unexpected nature of life does not mean that life is 'out to get you.' Rather it is just life happening and if we prepare our attitude ahead of time, then adjusting to the roller coaster events will easily be enjoyed or endured (for those that do not like roller coaster rides).

Now you are prepared!

Take a few minutes each morning to just relax and reflect upon how you want your day to go. Prepare yourself to understand how you feel going into your day. It is an attitude check that you can perform at any point or multiple points through out your day. An attitude check will prepare you for a great day and should be a part of the everyday routine.

Stay inspired my friends!

Where Do I Go?

"Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

The time approaches when you have identified an addicting habit, faced it and gone through recovery steps. You are like the shiny clean car being coming out at the end of the automated car wash. At that moment you are in a safe spot, clean and ready to face the world, yet you wonder which way to go, what next, and how.

The choice of roads are plentiful, some paved, some not. The sky has patches of blue with darkening clouds in one direction. The world seems scary and enticing, all at the same time once again. So you stop and wonder, "where do I go?"

Any time you have come through counseling, coaching, rehab, insert your favorite term here; part of that process should include steps to prepare you for this moment in time. In fact for most it can be the most difficult time in recovery because all of the tools, words, and safety are now your's to deploy in your new life.

Nearly every book I have read will say that recovery doesn't occur simply by ending the addictive behavior. Recovery happens by creating a new life where it is easier to not use. If you don't create a new life, all of those things that brought you to your addiction will eventually catch up with you again.

Not everything has to change and all of us know that the world itself will not change to meet your new needs. All of those things, friends, neighborhoods, hangouts and other strong influences will still exist. Many of those things will have to be let go in your new life and the more you try to hold onto your old life in recovery, the less well you will do.

There are things you can do which will help you avoid a relapse and ease the anxiety of what you are going through.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(from Seth Meyers, Psy.D., clinical psychologist with the L.A. County Department of Mental Health.)

1. Get a sponsor.

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you need to join Alcoholics Anonymous or another twelve-step group to have a sponsor. If you don’t want to join a twelve-step group, ask a trusted friend to be your sponsor, someone you can call when you’re overwhelmed. Having a sponsor is a crucial, time-tested part of successful recovery.

2. Always remember HALT.

After running addiction groups on Skid Rowe in Los Angeles for a long time, I found that one of the most helpful tools for recovering addicts is a neat and simple acronym: H (Hungry), A (Angry), L (Lonely), T (Tired). Research—and first-hand accounts of thousands of addicts—tell us that you’re more likely to relapse if you experience any of these strong feelings. Be careful and make sure to take care of yourself so that these unchecked feelings don’t wreak continued havoc on your life! Get your rest, eat well, surround yourself with positive people, and express your anger in the right places: your journal, therapy, or artistic outlets.

3. Find purpose.

One of the best ways to ensure a successful recovery is to make sure that you’re clear on your sense of purpose—and I’m not just talking about returning to your job to pay the bills after rehab has drained your bank account. I’m talking about making sure that your life has meaning in several domains: cultivating friendships full of nurturance and support, volunteering for organizations that serve others who are less fortunate, and even writing about your story—in a journal, a blog post, or even planting the seeds to write your very first book!

4. Rediscover childhood fun.

Consistently, I find in my work with addicts that their addictions took over so much of their lives that they stopped doing some very simple and basic activities that once brought them peace and joy—and people need joy like the IRS needs tax returns. My advice is simple in this department: Figure out what you have fun doing—and a return to addictive behavior doesn't count—and pursue those activities in a disciplined way (e.g., twice per week or more frequently). Examples: dancing, uncommon exercises (kick-boxing class, Pilates), and creative pursuits either at home or in a class at a local community college (drawing, painting, sculpting). We did this stuff as kids, so why did we ever stop?

5. Work on your relationships.

It’s impossible to be an addict without simultaneously damaging some of your closest relationships. Yes, it’s hard to be the addict, but it’s no easier to be the loved one of the addict. After rehab, you must start to do the work to improve your relationships that have suffered because of your historic loyalty to the addiction—and your loved ones know too well that you put your addiction first. Start having conversations with your loved ones about their feelings and apologize for the fact that your problems caused problems for them, too. Give them a chance to tell you how they’ve felt as they witnessed your downward spiral, and reassure them that you are now making an honest commitment to change. If you get feedback that is painful or hard to hear, call your new sponsor who can give you some perspective on the situation.

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There will be a time when the road becomes much more clear in your life. When you reach the point of not worrying about the road ahead, knowing you have the ability to take on any thing, in any fashion, in your own way. Stay inspired my friends.

Relationship with Addiction

"No one is immune from addiction; it afflicts people of all ages, races, classes, and professions." -Patrick J. Kennedy

Psychology Today describes addiction as "a condition that results when a person ingests a substance (alcohol, drugs) or engages in an activity (gambling, pornography) that can be pleasurable but the continued use of which becomes compulsive and interferes with ordinary life responsibilities, such as work or relationships, or health. Users may not be aware that their behavior is out of control and causing problems for themselves and others."

The experts debate if addiction is a "disease" or a true mental illness but in either case, addictions need to be dealt with if the its spiraling effects are to be stopped. And many people, either addicted or speaking of those addicted will debate what is the difference between a habit and an addiction?

Addiction - there is a psychological/physical component; the person is unable to control the aspects of the addiction without help because of the mental or physical conditions involved.

Habit - it is done by choice. The person with the habit can choose to stop, and will subsequently stop successfully if they want to. The psychological/physical component is not an issue as it is with an addiction.

So in its simplest form, if it were a habit, you would be in control of your choices. When it comes to addiction, you are not in control of your choices, the addiction is running the show. And that addiction can come in different forms because an addiction is when a person does an activity, or uses a substance, that they find so pleasurable they cannot stop doing or using it.

There are different types of addictions as noted such as;

Drugs and Alcohol

Having an addiction to mind-altering drugs is very unpleasant, scary, and sometimes deadly. People must enter a rehabilitation center to receive medication and counseling, in order to safely detoxify from these substances. Usually, when a person is addicted to a certain substance, they are susceptible to having addictions to other substances. In addition, most drugs are illegal and carry legal repercussions. Loss of relationships, family and home normally occur with this or any type of addiction if not dealt with.

Gambling and Shopping

Ding, ding, din, the alluring sound of those slot machines or maybe the enticing store display with it 30% off sale price signs. Both seem innocent enough because the act of winning or taking home a new possession can and does produce excitement and pleasure that can lead to continuing the behavior; many times to immeasurable lengths. In example, a gambler or shopping addict may spend all of their money and go into debt, even if they have a family to care for. The results of either can mean huge debt, loss of family and home.

Sex or Pornography

There are those that will seek to please others so that they themselves will feel love in return. While sex is a physical act, the act itself satisfies the need for love and attention that those with sexual addictions crave. This same need can be manifested in the form of viewing pornography and the resulting physical release without commitment or "strings attached" obligations. The end results of either can be loss of relationships, jobs, self respect and even medical problems.

Exercise

Yes, exercise can become an addiction as people become obsessed with having a perfect body. This type of addict must work out daily, sometimes many times a day or for hours on end, striving for excellence in performance and physique. These type of people get addicted to the “high” experienced from the endorphins released through exercise. An exercise addict must work out to the extreme in order to feel good about them-self.

As you can see, addiction becomes an addiction when it interferes with the many other parts of your life. When your relationship to life becomes all consuming by the addiction, exclusively and under its controlling methods.

The good news is that addiction is treatable, can be overcome and that hope for returning to a normal life does exist.

The first step or phase of treatment is withdrawal from the problem substance or activity. Many organizations that treat addiction will describe this phase in acknowledging there are both physical and psychological effects that occur when substance-taking stops. This includes physical signs as nausea and vomiting, chills and sweats, muscle cramps and aches, sleeplessness, shifts in heart rate, even fever. The emotional effects include depression, anxiety, irritability, and mood swings.

The withdrawal symptoms normally last three to five days and while rarely life-threatening, medical supervision is usually provided in residential treatment programs, and medications may be given to ameliorate the acute discomfort of withdrawal for those undergoing drug or substance abuse types of treatment.

Behavioral therapy and counseling become important elements of all addiction treatments. This therapy will help people identify, avoid, and cope with situations in which they are most likely to abuse drugs or activities. There is an element to this type of treatment that will remind people of their value in life and to those around them. Family therapy may be provided or needed to help the patient maintain a supportive environment and improve family functioning.

While addictions have varying degrees of impact on the addicted person's life and those around them; these addictions can be overcome. There is hope, there is help and there is possibility for greatness beyond addiction.

Stay inspired my friends.

Back Soon

Back soon, traveling overseas so stay tuned. More great stuff to follow any day now.

Stay inspired my friends.

Happy July Fourth

"For what avail the plough or sail, or land or life, if freedom fail?" -Ralph Waldo Emerson

A very happy fourth of July to my fellow Americans.

Price of Choices

“Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it's always your choice..” -Wayne Dyer

In everything we do, there is choice of some sort that can be made. It could involve not having enough money. Where and how much to spend or even if to spend on a certain item. It could be a need to change your living style to meet your income. Or taking on a second job. Maybe you could even take classes to improve you job skills and get a promotion.

Choices exist, we only need to be willing to make them.

It could be a destructive relationship you are in. There is so much that can be said about relationships, but choices do exist. Or how about the lack of a relationship? The choice might be to turn off the television and go to places where people gather.

Deciding not to do anything is a choice as well. But using that one will get you absolutely nowhere.

The health you have can be impacted by making certain choices. Disease and medical conditions are treated by physicians, with choices to be made. But we also have the choice to take care of our physical state. To again, to turn off the television and take a walk, little steps to help improve your health. I'm not here to say you will live longer, although statistics would support that. What I'm talking about is improving the quality of your life.

Will you make a choice to improve the quality of your life?

What price will you pay for the choices you make?

Choice is there for the taking and you need to make one. We each are given one life and of course, how you live it is yours to decide. But if you want to change the life you live, then stand up, choose and then step out boldly.

Stay inspired my friends.

What is Freedom

"What is freedom? Freedom is the right to choose: the right to create for oneself the alternatives of choice." -Archibald MacLeish

The word freedom is defined as the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint. It is a word that is easily ignored and also easily used in defense of one's action.

There are many types of freedom;

- Freedom of assembly
- Freedom of association
- Freedom of choice
- Freedom of speech
- Economic freedom
- Academic freedom
- Intellectual freedom
- Religious freedom
- Scientific freedom

And of course, free will.

Freedom is exactly what it states, and there is no such thing as "no strings attached" when it comes to living our lives free. When we take freedom for granted, there are sure to be those that will attempt to take our freedoms away. That loss can come from an over burdening government, over zealous religious leaders, abusive relationships, and a host of other sources. For every step we fail to take in guarding our freedom is another step back into some level of bondage.

But with freedom comes responsibility. This means that we must accept the consequences of our choices. We must respect and protect each others' freedom, not just our own. Not everyone respects this responsibility and freedom without mutual responsibility becomes the law of the jungle. Everyone being out for themselves, fighting not only for their own freedom but to subjugate others to their own will.

Men and women have died for thousands of years fighting not only for your freedom to choose and believe but for mine as well. When we accept that each of us has a responsibility to protect and defend those freedoms, only then will freedom really remain freedom.

As we celebrate this week in the United States, two-hundred thirty seven years of independence; be mindful of the freedoms we have given up. We have given up freedoms in the name of national security that one could argue go beyond simple protection. We have given up financial freedoms in the form of dependence upon a government as the source of all our needs. We have given up religious freedoms in the fear of those religions different from our own. So many have simply given up.

Freedom is not lost and we can regain much of what has been lost by simply choosing to be free once again. When we acknowledge that we must work to protect not only our rights but the rights of others. When we take responsibility for our own freedom and understand the cost associated with keeping ourselves free. When we simply choose to be free, freedom then becomes real.

Stay inspired my friends.

Freedom of Speech

Almost Never Happens

"Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today." -Mark Twain

almost
Main Entry: al·most
Pronunciation: \ˈol-ˌmōst, ol-ˈ\
Function: adverb
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English ealmæst, from eall + mæst most
Date: before 12th century

: very nearly but not exactly or entirely

Yesterday, you almost called home to say hello to your mother. With a passing thought, you almost held a door open for someone carrying a package. Early this morning you almost had a conversation with your teenage child. Those things that we almost do in life but never seem to find the urge to actually do.

Your day goes by, then a week and eventually the year is nearly over. We think back and wonder at all of those things we missed doing. We feel that we came close, that we almost had the ability to do all of those meaningful things. But in our own self assessment, we know that almost really wasn't quite good enough.

The analogies one can use vary with many examples how almost results in things lost. In sports it might be said, "we almost made the winning touchdown." Yet the team still lost so almost doesn't quite cut it. In a political race, others may state, "we almost won the election." And once again, almost does not put the person into office.

Or the idea of almost completing your high school education. Almost does not make it easy to find a job or move ahead in life. There is also the big one, "I almost called to say hello," or for others, "I almost called to say I love you."

Life on earth is finite, and almost will turn into never being able to do those things. Find the time today to actually do those things that you know and feel need to be done. Do not put them off any longer, take the time now. Do not almost try it, actually accomplish and look back on all of those things you did complete.

Stay inspired my friends.

Over Deliver

"Only undertake what you can do in an excellent fashion. There are no prizes for average performance." -Brian Tracy

In an interview, former chairman and CEO of GE (General Electric) Jack Welch was asked, “What’s the secret to success?” Without hesitation, he blurted, “Find out what your boss wants and then over-deliver.” It is a simple, but true statement. When you over deliver on what the expectation is, a "wow" effect occurs that provides greater opportunity for success in your life.

Henry Cloud wrote a book called "Platform: Get Noticed in a Noisy World" where he describes wow as being what happens when you deliver more than your customer (boss, spouse, family, friends, etc.) expects. It is probably more true today with the short attention span most people have developed in this noisy multi-media information age; you must create wow to succeed.

The book offers some suggestions for grabbing hold of the idea that over-delivering can improve your career chances and life.

1. Make the decision to over-deliver. Few good things happen by accident. You have to decide you are going to do something differently—or do it at a different level. Just making this decision will set things in motion. It’s amazing how many aren’t willing to do this. They are content to do just enough to get by.

2. Get clear on your boss’s (or client’s) expectations. It’s really not about you—not if you are going to succeed. You have to be committed to making your boss successful. What does he expect from you? This is worth considering overall and on the front-end of each initiative. Start by asking, “What do you expect from me?” His response sets the bar.

3. Identify specific ways you can exceed them. This is where the fun begins. List your boss’s (or client’s) expectations in one column of a sheet of paper or on a spreadsheet. Now, in another column, list what you could do to exceed those expectations. How can you make his jaw drop or at least make him smile with delight? Use your creativity to create a wow experience.

4. Make wow your new standard. Every time you exceed your boss’s expectations, you create a branding impression. You want to develop a reputation for consistently over-delivering. You want to be the first person your boss thinks of when considering a new position or important project. That’s the secret to getting ahead.

The reality is that it will take hard work and additional effort to raise your level of performance. And as you continue to over-deliver, the expectations of even more will occur. In actuality it becomes a commitment to never-ending improvement. But our human potential, your human potential, is mostly under-utilized.

You can do more than we allow ourselves to believe we can do. So over-deliver on something today, then grow it day by day and realize the potential that exists within.

Stay inspired my friends.

All to Give

"I will grow. I will become something new and grand, but no grander than I now am. Just as the sky will be different in a few hours, its present perfection and completeness is not deficient, so am I presently perfect and not deficient because I will be different tomorrow. I will grow and I am not deficient." -Wayne Dyer

Our lives are full of choices regarding how we are willing to give of ourselves. We choose to apply either small or large amounts of energy to accomplish a task. Many times we choose to give nothing as we are afraid of failure. The idea that you could attempt something and not complete it frightens you.

There are times when you give only a partial effort as you believe the perception of having tried is all that is needed. You step half way, keeping one foot firmly planted on solid ground. A goal can never be achieved by half-trying. When you give all that you can in attempting those things in life, there is no failure in not achieving the goal. In many respects, you may find that what you eventually achieve is not necessarily what you first wanted.

A great example comes from a friend who recently passed away.

Belinda is a dear friend of our family, one of those people everyone should have as a friend. As many of us are, she was not as athletic as she once was. But this particular day, the goal she wanted to achieve was only forty feet away.

It would be equivalent to some twenty steps if walking, but this forty feet was straight up. It was a climbing tower with varying challenges for even the most fit. The goal or reward once reaching the top was an exhilarating zip line ride down over a lake. The ultimate reward after accomplishing a tough climb.

Belinda was determined and resolute in not letting fear or physical limitations from achieving the prize. So up the first ten feet of cross bars and transitioning to a netted ladder. Difficult climbing if one is not used to using the many muscles in your legs and arms on a daily basis.

Exhaustion was beginning to make a presence when she made it through twenty feet of climbing. The next ten feet involved climbing a swinging ten foot log. There are foot pegs at various points, but again the physical requirements will take its toll.

The fear and trust in the equipment always plays with you mentally as you climb for the first time. A chorus of encouragement rang out as Belinda made it up to the thirty foot level. By now though she had given everything physically that she could. She had expended any remaining amount of energy that her body could muster for the final ten feet.

I have heard the phrase "giving it all" said many times but it isn't often that you truly see it happen. Many times people are said to "give it all", but have more left in them. This time I saw it unfold before us, Belinda had given all that she had. There were words of encouragement and adoration for a great attempt.

Belinda may not have achieved the goal she set out for, but I do believe she achieved something else. It was a prize found inside, a new found belief in herself and the possibilities in life.

You see, all of us will learn something about ourselves when we step out and as we move towards a goal in the belief that we will succeed. Accept that your mission to succeed may result in finding something completely different. The end result may mean achieving something far greater for your life.

Give it all when moving towards a dream and embrace what you eventually find. Belinda achieved perfection in that moment and so can you. Stay inspired my friends.

Your Level of Vision

"Realize that if you have time to whine and complain about something then you have the time to do something about it." -Anthony J. D'Angelo,

In life, all of us have complaints and concerns regarding various issues that occur around us. It may be the way that someone at work seems to rub you the wrong way. Or possibly at church you find that the "music is too loud." What about complaining of the next door neighbors that seem to always have a newer car than you?

Each of us will fall into this bad attitude trap at various times in our life. It will come to pass that you find your self in a state of perpetual complaining or yearning to have something beyond what you already have. Just consider what a friend of mine, Graham Fletcher, said, "the level of your complaint is the level of your vision."

If you complain about the situation, it is within that situation you will remain. Stop complaining and do something about it. You want that newer vehicle, then adjust your attitude and work towards having a new car. The music is too loud, then move to a different part of the church or find a church that is more suitable. One that you will be able to grow in, both in spirit and attitude. Maybe that person at work could use more cooperation from you or possibly mentoring. Doing so will increase your skills, the boss likes what you've done, possibly get a better pay raise next time. Then guess what, you just might be able to afford that new car to drive to church in.

Do not think that we can't complain in life. It is the idea that simply complaining and not doing anything about it that restricts you. One way to deal with it is to "see the answer and not the problem", get up and do something to correct the situation in order to achieve a greater life.

There is a lot of good out in the world and a lot of potential in each one of you.

Move to make change and leave your complaints behind. Reach out for a greater vision that is obtainable by choosing not to hold onto complaints. Do it today for now is the time.

Stay inspired my friends.

Focus On Your Goals

"Learn from the past, set vivid, detailed goals for the future, and live in the only moment of time over which you have any control: now." -Denis Waitley

In an article called "Healthy, Wealthy & Wise" by Andrea Rains Waggener, being goal-oriented means never leaving home without knowing where you're going.

Goal-oriented is visionary. It sees possibilities and figures out how to turn them into actualities.

Goal-oriented has a plan and a result in mind. It enjoys the trip along the way, but ultimately, it wants to reach the viewpoint at the end of the trail.

I'll admit that I've never been the best at being goal-oriented. My success has come more from having a vision in mind and then simply moving upon it. Making changes and adjustments as I work towards that vision. And over the years this process has taught me that it can work yet is full of twists and turns.

To bring your vision to fruition, having goals attached to and driving that vision greatly helps. Writing these goals down will make that vision much more real, much more attainable. Set goals that will move you towards your vision.

Then sit down and do the following;

1. Write down your vision
2. Write down three goals that will set a course towards your vision

Now, make copies of the above and put one in your billfold or purse. Place one on your desk at work, at school and at home. Put one in places where you'll see it during the normal things you do through out your day.

Repeat them to yourself when you can, tell them to others when the opportunity presents itself and keep your focus on those goals. Your vision will shine within you and become more clear.

Stay inspired my friends.

Underground Attitude

"Goodness is the only investment that never fails." -Henry David Thoreau

Traveling in London by means of the Underground can be quite interesting. Watching how people react to each other when the train is full versus a somewhat empty train can be quite an experience.

Is there chivalry amongst the men riding the train?

Is there giving help to others still a natural occurrence.

What about common courtesy among the travelers?

I find that on a crowded train, men do tend to give up their seat for a woman when no other is available. When a crowded train pulls up, people do tend to allow the flow of others to take place.

All of this is happening with strangers among strangers. A natural giving of oneself to better the surroundings.

In doing small things that bring a bit of pleasantness into the lives of others can make a difference. The train ride is a bit more bearable during rush hour. Even during non-rush hour times, courtesy can be found if you look for it. Helping someone with their luggage onto the train. Providing directions to those that look lost. It happens more frequently than we might first admit.

All of us could use some kindness in life from others. And when you receive it, pass it on in some fashion. Attitude improves as one progressively does more for others. Open up your seat for another, lift a bag to help them...it will open your heart and lift your spirits.

Stay inspired my friends.